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Wedding Photography and Videography Forum
Disappointed in Engagement Photos
The point of this post is to see what you girls think I should do regarding my engagement photos. After reading the situation below, should I ask for some extra shooting time with this photographer or add engagement pics in with our wedding photographer's package. The limitation is that my fiancee will be deployed in a couple weeks and we may not get a chance to meet up with the same photographer, plus I feel like that might be awkward, but we did pay him extra, not sure why. On the other hand, he may not be back until November or December and we live in Kentucky (COLD) and are getting married in March, so we will be limited on photo options and time then as well. Anyway, any opinions are appreciated.
So, my fiancee thought it'd be a good idea to "surprise" me with engagment photos. However, I did most of the legwork finding a photographer and checking availability, getting prices, etc, because he's being deployed and I was looking in to making him take some with me before he left anyway. So, I put a ton of time and effort into getting the perfect outfits, getting my hair and nails done, updating my make-up, etc as I had to travel to see him. Well, he wanted to take over the planning because we weren't actually engaged yet and I guess he wanted it to be at least a little of a surprise. So on saturday, we get up, make a 2.5 hour drive to a nearby city, where I think we're staying overnight, I do my make-up in the car and barely fix my hair, then we walk around and eat for a couple hours, then go to some hills overlooking the golden gate bridge, where the wind is blowing 30 miles an hour, then a photographer pops up out of nowhere. So you can imagine how I feel when I realize we are taking pics on these hills where there is no place to change, no mirror to use, but the car mirror, my clothes are folded up and wrinkled in my suitcase and my hair and makeup look like I woke up from an afternoon nap. And neither of them thought I'd like to know that my jeans were not flattering, the pair I planned on wearing had gotten dirty along the way, I know I'm not a big girl, but those jeans say differently! I was less than thrilled. So not only do I look bad because I could not "fix" myself, but also because I was frustrated and uncomfortable the whole time. It was so awkward because we weren't engaged yet, which ruined the engagement because, obviously he was going to ask me during the shoot, probably right after the photographer said "do your thing, man". I feel awful to complain because he tried to do a nice thing, but I'm a girly girl and he knows this, he didn't think his plan through well at all. Oh yeah, one other thing, he wore this awful, baggy fleece in EVERY picture, except the ones where my hair is blowing so crazy you can't see my face. Any thoughts?
So, my fiancee thought it'd be a good idea to "surprise" me with engagment photos. However, I did most of the legwork finding a photographer and checking availability, getting prices, etc, because he's being deployed and I was looking in to making him take some with me before he left anyway. So, I put a ton of time and effort into getting the perfect outfits, getting my hair and nails done, updating my make-up, etc as I had to travel to see him. Well, he wanted to take over the planning because we weren't actually engaged yet and I guess he wanted it to be at least a little of a surprise. So on saturday, we get up, make a 2.5 hour drive to a nearby city, where I think we're staying overnight, I do my make-up in the car and barely fix my hair, then we walk around and eat for a couple hours, then go to some hills overlooking the golden gate bridge, where the wind is blowing 30 miles an hour, then a photographer pops up out of nowhere. So you can imagine how I feel when I realize we are taking pics on these hills where there is no place to change, no mirror to use, but the car mirror, my clothes are folded up and wrinkled in my suitcase and my hair and makeup look like I woke up from an afternoon nap. And neither of them thought I'd like to know that my jeans were not flattering, the pair I planned on wearing had gotten dirty along the way, I know I'm not a big girl, but those jeans say differently! I was less than thrilled. So not only do I look bad because I could not "fix" myself, but also because I was frustrated and uncomfortable the whole time. It was so awkward because we weren't engaged yet, which ruined the engagement because, obviously he was going to ask me during the shoot, probably right after the photographer said "do your thing, man". I feel awful to complain because he tried to do a nice thing, but I'm a girly girl and he knows this, he didn't think his plan through well at all. Oh yeah, one other thing, he wore this awful, baggy fleece in EVERY picture, except the ones where my hair is blowing so crazy you can't see my face. Any thoughts?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Disappointed in Engagement Photos
Regarding the wedding-related photography, adopt the attitude that these photos were to capture your engagement day, but were not your engagement photos. That will be in another session when you're fully prepared. If your fiance balks, saying you already have your engagement photos, explain like you did in your post and like I did above.
In short, don't make this about how things went wrong, but about how much better they're going to be. Yes, he may think he's done with the e-session thing, and with his upcoming deployment he may not want one more thing to do. But make it fun, let him know you love him for it -- all of it -- and get it done!