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Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
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how to honor...

undyingmizeryundyingmizery
500 Comments
in Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
My parents of whom adopted me at a very young age have passed away a few years ago. My FI Father passed away when he was 9. How can I honor those who have passed in a good way without making things an emotional mess. I want things to be fun and a happy occassion. But still want to have the memory present of those who supported us in who we are today.
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Re: how to honor...

  • bethsmilesbethsmiles member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    You can honor them by simply being happy (like they would want) on your wedding day. I hate memorials are weddings but if you really want something...

    Did your mom have a favorite flower? You could incorporate it into your bouquet.
    I know some people do tiny picture frames on their bouquets.
    Tiny things that only you or your FI know about are best.


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  • undyingmizeryundyingmizery
    500 Comments
    See I don't want to do a memorial but I do like the flower idea. See that's more what I was asking sorry I just didn't know how to work it properly.
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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    My mom passed away 3 weeks before DD's wedding.  DD and her grandma were very close.

    DD wore a pair of grandma's earrings during the wedding.  She also had our pastor mention grandma and my SIL's dad (who had died 9 months before wedding) in the prayer/blessing before dinner.

    Like you, DD wanted the day to be a joyous celebration, and not make anything "in your face" about their losses.  So they did what they did quietly.  Besides, my mom would have hated, hated, hated anything that took away from her beloved granddaughter on her wedding day.  =)

    My DIL's dad passed away about 10 years before she and our son were married.  DIL also said her wedding was a day to celebrate joy, so she chose not to have anything done at the wedding.

    I think you need to do what makes you comfortable, but I have to say I agreed with DD, SIL, and DIL about keeping anything extemely low key.

    I'm sorry for your losses, and wish you well!
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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  • DramaGeekDramaGeek member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    I was very close to my grandfathers, both of whom passed away before our wedding.  I got a locket and had pictures of my grandfathers put into it.  The pics were from my parents' wedding.
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  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_honor?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:b9900164-20ef-441f-85a2-0ef299c0ca4fPost:9bde86e7-042f-4c46-8d7a-cde283005d00">Re: how to honor...</a>:
    [QUOTE]You can honor them by simply being happy (like they would want) on your wedding day. I hate memorials are weddings but if you really want something... Did your mom have a favorite flower? You could incorporate it into your bouquet. I know some people do tiny picture frames on their bouquets. <strong><font color="#0000ff">Tiny things that only you or your FI know about are best.
    </font></strong>Posted by bethsmiles[/QUOTE]

    Agree.
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  • jana953jana953 member
    10 Comments
    at my wedding we are doing something for our grandparents who are no longer with us. i bought a vase through oriental trading that says something like " In remembrance of life and love that came before us" that will be filled with flowers and then setting out portraits of each of them next to the guest book.

    I also thought about putting a remembrance at the end of the slide show before the ceremony starts.
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