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September 2012 Weddings
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if you are writing original vows....

volleygurl0306volleygurl0306 member
1000 Comments Second Anniversary
in September 2012 Weddings
Are you going to read them to someone (mom, MOH, etc) first?  I feel like I'd love a second set of ears but also I don't want to take away FI being the first to hear them.  Obviously everyone will hear them at the same time but I mean that someone wouldn't have heard them first.  I also don't know how well I'd take criticism since they are so deeply personal but I'm also nervous that they could be better or that I could phrase something better.  I just want to make sure they are easy to understand I guess.  And I think saying them in front of someone first may take the edge off of the actual day. 

I've actually already had my vows written for months and just read them time to time and make small changes.  My MOH is a beautiful writer and I can't decide if her opinion would be helpful or invasive or what.  Have you given any thought to this?  What are you doing?
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Re: if you are writing original vows....

  • mamameechmamameech
    1000 Comments
    I think I'll keep mine totally private. If I do share them, it might be with my sister. I kinda want him to be the first to hear it :)
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  • volleygurl0306volleygurl0306 member
    1000 Comments Second Anniversary
    I'm really leaning towards keeping it private but I feel slightly insecure about them for some reason.  Totally stupid because they are mine for him and no one else.  And I could say I'll love you every day and he'd be happy.  Maybe because FI and I are so competitive and he keeps telling me his are going to be better haha.  Think I'm just hyping myself into being nervous. 
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  • mamameechmamameech
    1000 Comments
    i know that whatever i write will be better than FI's LOL
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  • volleygurl0306volleygurl0306 member
    1000 Comments Second Anniversary
    Haha is he not a good writer?  On our website under the standard bride and groom profile instead of writing them together or about ourselves, we wrote them about each other.  And what he said about me KILLED what I said about him.  In all fairness he did read what I wrote before he wrote his but still.  He was incredibly thoughtful and romantic.  Maybe it got me because it was the only love letter-like thing I have from him (except for random "You're wonderful I love you" texts haha).  But still, he is a beautiful writer and I want to beat him hahah.  Even if I "lose" I guess that means he wrote some pretty awesome vows that I'm going to hold him too so not a bad consolation prize. 
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  • mamameechmamameech
    1000 Comments
    My FI is NOT a good writer. He has a hard time expressing himself verbally and in written language. He confuses cliches and mixes up quotes all the time. He's also highly inappropriate; not intentionally by any means but he defnitely lacks a filter.
    I am a good writer and express true feeling and emotions. Like I said in the other post, he'd most likely follow my vows with a high five or a "ditto" response lol
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  • volleygurl0306volleygurl0306 member
    1000 Comments Second Anniversary
    OMG I have a sense of humor but a high five or ditto would piss me off!!!!  You should make him go first so he can't do that haha.  FI was all set to go second so he could hear my first and when we got the script back from our officiant she put FI's first.  So I told him too bad the officiant said so and he tried to point out how we are customizing everything else about our ceremony from the script but I told him that one was set in stone.  I'm the one who communicates with our officiant so I'll make sure it stays that way. 
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  • Tandra&DevinTandra&Devin
    100 Comments
    My FI and I did an "our story" thing on our wedding website where we wrote what we loved about each other and what we're looking forward to at the wedding.  Like always, I rambled on for two paragraphs, and he, after "thinking about it all day at work" slapped down two sentences.  Two very sweet sentences, but still two.  Oy vey.
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  • jessa1228jessa1228 member
    1000 Comments Second Anniversary
    If you mean that you want someone to make sure what you're saying is grammatically correct and flows properly, that's one thing. But I wouldn't want someone telling me "oh I think you should say it THIS way instead" or "use THIS word instead of THAT", you know? Because they're YOUR thoughts and feelings, no one should really be critiquing them.
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