My matron of honor has been my best friend since 6th grade and is an ultra flake. I asked her to be in my wedding shortly after I got engaged in April. She jumped at the idea and immediately began asking me about the bridal shower and bachelorette party (I am getting married in September of next year, and she was literally texting me 4 times a minute for details about those far off events).
Yesterday she texted me and said that she was unsure she could make a commitment to be in or even come to my wedding, but she would let me know in December. Her husband is military and they are getting reassigned around that time, but she has known that for well over a year.
I am so upset that she is tentatively backing out, and I am really turned off by the fact that she said yes and waited until 4 months later to tell me it might be a no, that I don't know if I even want her in the wedding anymore. Am I overreacting? (She has done this sort of thing our whole lives and when she got married she told everyone we knew and made them promise not to tell me. I didn't find out she was married until 3 months later and I found out from a third party, so I guess I should have expected it, but it has just really hurt my feelings.)