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August 2012 Weddings
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Is this unreasonable?

unicorntreesunicorntrees member
Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments
in August 2012 Weddings
Hello again August board! The past week got hectic for me. I will make a post of updates (with pics!) as I've gotten quite a few things done, but I will do it later when I'm at home.

For now, I have a semi-etiquette question. I am considering asking a friend of mine to do a reading for the ceremony. Would it be unreasonable to ask her to take out her septum ring or put something in that is not noticeable? FI was concerned that it might garner unwanted attention from some family members.

If this is a reasonable request, how do I go about asking her? She is OOT, so I am waiting for confirmation that she is coming (she was asking me about hotel info last week) before I ask her. I don't want to accidentally offend her or anything.

TIA!
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Re: Is this unreasonable?

  • spazticrexespazticrexe
    100 Comments
    Well.. you knew she had a septum ring when you asked her, so I don't know that there's any nice/polite way to go about asking her to take it out.

    If she offers to take it out or wear a plug, of course go ahead and take her up on it.
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  • StephyD216StephyD216 member
    Third Anniversary 10 Comments
    I don't think there's a polite way to ask that. Do you think it will be that noticeable to your guests? I don't know if you're getting married in a church or somewhere similar, but it may go unnoticed by many.
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  • mtbentleymtbentley
    100 Comments
    I don't really think there is a nice way of asking her to take it out. If she offers I think it is okay, or if the church/ceremony location doesn't wan't her to wear it for some reason. If she sees her piercings as a way to express her personality then I wouldn't ask her to remove it. 
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  • AjoydAjoyd member
    100 Comments
    I agree with PPs that there is no polite way to ask her to take it out. If it is a concern for you then you should probably ask someone else.

    Sorry but you could potentially really hurt her feelings by asking her to remove it.
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  • ohnoitskaroljoohnoitskaroljo
    100 Comments
    I've had lots of piercings. Literally damn near everything my face has had a hole in it at some time. I personally never got offended when I was asked to remove them / hide them. I don't think it's necessarily unreasonable for you to ask her to hide it, but keep in mind that this is part of who she is and you should accept her as is.

    With that said - does she wear a "horseshoe" shaped barbell in her septum? And is it large or small? If it's a smaller horseshoe sized one, just ask if she'd be willing to flip it up into her nose during the reading. Then she doesn't have to take it out and can flip it right back down after pictures are taken. I've seen people do that tons of times with septum rings. :)
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  • unicorntreesunicorntrees member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments
    Thanks ladies. It seems as though this wasn't as big a deal as I thought it was, which was originally why I brought the question here. Thanks for being constructive!

    Mt, I know I've seen the tattoo question, and I thought this was kind of the same too. It's also why I brought the question here and not the etiquette board, lol. 
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