this is the code for the render ad
Community› Cultural Wedding Boards› African American Weddings
African American Weddings
New Discussion

Oh I Wish I Could...

aquari0216aquari0216 member
500 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
in African American Weddings
Invite way more ppl than we can to our big day, someone told me that they went to a wedding that charged some ppl per plate....really? How bad on the etiquette scale is this? How is it done? How do you word it? I doubt I'd do this but hell, how do ppl do this? I honestly do think I'd find it rude because I've always gone to weddings for free, but that's my upbringing....is it as rude as I think it may be?
****The Future Mrs. Ikeard**** wedding countdown
Report Reply to Post

Re: Oh I Wish I Could...

  • Anjee23Anjee23
    100 Comments First Anniversary
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_oh-i-wish-i-could?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:1b7e79ec-6457-43fc-95ce-231406f1a410Post:49781bd3-8df2-41a6-929d-fed04f950f0c">Oh I Wish I Could...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Invite way more ppl than we can to our big day, someone told me that they went to a wedding that charged some ppl per plate....really? How bad on the etiquette scale is this? How is it done? How do you word it? I doubt I'd do this but hell, how do ppl do this? I honestly do think I'd find it rude because I've always gone to weddings for free, but that's my upbringing....is it as rude as I think it may be?
    Posted by aquari0216[/QUOTE]

    Oh wow!  I never been to a wedding where they charged some people per plate.  I'm not sure how I'd take it if I received an invitation like that.  I'm with you, I think it would be rude. Ummm yeah...you're invited to our big day, but you have to pay for you food. And don't forget the gift! LOL!  I wonder how they determine who pays and who doesn't, then do you sit all the people that paid at the same table?
    With that being said, it also depends on the situation. If you have someone that wants to bring people with them, then they should pay for their plate. My cousin wanted to bring two of her friends. I explained that one of her friends would have to pay, or share a plate with her. Excuse me cousin, but your invitation calls for +1. LOL!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • ladycane015ladycane015 member
    500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    I dont think I would attend a wedding that I have to pay for my plate. I think it's at the top of the etiquette scale. I'll pay for my drinks if I wanted alcohol (even though thats supposedly a "no no" as well lol) but b/c we're inviting people to our party to celebrate with us I think it's only right that we pay for their meal. Do you already have your venue? If not are there any venues that you can choose where you can cater from outside? Being that that is sometimes more reasonably priced it may allow you to invite more ppl? I don't think there is a nice way to word it honestly lol.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • keyaira04keyaira04 member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Coming from someone who usually throws aside the etiquette presented on this website, I think this situation is not good etiquette. Paying for a drink is one thing, but paying for a meal...hmm. 

    The only time during a wedding weekend Ive heard the host ask people to bring their money for the meal is the rehearsal dinner or maybe a brunch the day after. Even with this request, the guests presence was optional. Many might still find this questionable.
    Daisypath Wedding tickers LilySlim Fitness goals tickers
    Report Reply
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 250 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited January 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_oh-i-wish-i-could?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:400Discussion:1b7e79ec-6457-43fc-95ce-231406f1a410Post:49781bd3-8df2-41a6-929d-fed04f950f0c">Oh I Wish I Could...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Invite way more ppl than we can to our big day, someone told me that they went to a wedding that charged some ppl per plate....really? <strong>How bad on the etiquette scale is this</strong>? <strong>How is it done</strong>? How do you word it? I doubt I'd do this but hell, how do ppl do this? I honestly do think I'd find it rude because I've always gone to weddings for free, but that's my upbringing....<strong>is it as rude as I think it may be</strong>?
    Posted by aquari0216[/QUOTE]

    1. a negative 4.
    2. it isn't.
    3. no, it's about 57% more rude than that. 

    dead.  I don't even understand how, as a society we got here.  Hosting an event means the host incurs all of the costs.  There are no circumstances under which it's appropriate to ask your guests to help incur any portion of them.   If that bride's point is that she wanted to accommodate everyone, I get it, but it just means nobody in her cipher was willing to tell her the truth.  poor taste does not make up for good intentions.
    Report Reply
  • gmg75241gmg75241 member
    100 Comments
    No I wouldnt suggest doing that. I would probably turn around and leave lol.

    Although, if you are having a wedding where they charge per person, make sure you check how many people come in. At the end of the night, they charged my card an extra $600 for people who showed up  but had not rsvped. SMH
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • aquari0216aquari0216 member
    500 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    In Response to Re:Oh I Wish I Could...:[QUOTE]In Response to Oh I Wish I Could...:Invite way more ppl than we can to our big day, someone told me that they went to a wedding that charged some ppl per plate....really? How bad on the etiquette scale is this? How is it done? How do you word it? I doubt I'd do this but hell, how do ppl do this? I honestly do think I'd find it rude because I've always gone to weddings for free, but that's my upbringing....is it as rude as I think it may be?Posted by aquari02161. a negative 4.2. it isn't. 3. no, it's about 57 more rude than that.nbsp; dead.nbsp; I don't even understand how, as a society we got here.nbsp; Hosting an event means the host incurs all of the costs.nbsp; There are no circumstances under which it's appropriate to ask your guests to help incur any portion of them.nbsp;nbsp; If that bride's point is that she wanted to accommodate everyone, I get it, but it just means nobody in her cipher was willing to tell her the truth.nbsp; poor taste does not make up for good intentions. Posted by sultryzulu[/QUOTE]
    Very well put....
    ****The Future Mrs. Ikeard**** wedding countdown
    Report Reply
  • M1ssJM1ssJ member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    The reception is the first event you host as husband and wife. I can understand in a situation where ppl went to the courthouse and then had mom and pops go to dinner aftwerwards and maybe tell bestie we're going to dinner and bestie pays her own way

    but at a reception that is a no. Its like inviting someone to your home for dinner and saying I'll need 34.78 for dinner please.
    577906 10151197172303105 844768324 n Follow Me on Pinterest www.shoplovelivelearn.blogspot.com Anniversary
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards