Wording for "Donation-Favors"

nefariousmango · June 2010

We're making a donation to the horse rescue I volunteer at but also doing small favors (little chocolates on the tables). Thus, the donation is not the favor. I would like to put something on the tables just saying a little about the rescue and why it's important to us, without coming off as AWish. Maybe something like, "On our happiest day we're giving to a small charity with a massive heart: The Horse Rescue of Place Location. We think they do an amazing job rehabbing horses seized by animal control, and they rely 100% on volunteers and donations! If you want to learn more, visit their website....."

What do you think? Other ideas?

Button5807 · June 2010

unless it was attached to the favor I probably wouldn't even notice it. That being said if it was attached to the favor I would think it was part of the favor.

bethsmiles · June 2010

I would tweak it a little bit to say this:

"On our happiest day we're giving to a small charity with a massive heart. The Horse Rescue of Place Location does an amazing job rehabbing horses seized by animal control, and they rely 100% on volunteers and donations! If you want to learn more, visit their website....."

Also I think it would be nice to add your connection to the place, like how many years you have volunteered there...not so you can be AW but so your guests know that you have a personal reason for donating and that you know the organization well.

desertsun · June 2010

Have you thought about doing a separate table for your horse rescue? People might look at it during cocktail hour? You could try and get a largish framed photo to draw attention, maybe put it near your guest book? People could sign up for emails or something if they want more info.

I don't know. Just trying to think of ways to make it NOT favor-ish. I agree with Button I might not pay a lot of attention to it on the table.

I think pictures and talking about your years there and examples of what you've done to make it really personal are great ideas.

bethsmiles · June 2010

I like the idea of a separate table. i agree that I probably wouldn't notice or pay attention to it if it were just sitting on my table.

sapphirebaby926 · June 2010

I think that if you had a separate table that it would appear that you are asking your guests to make a donation.

Are you doing table numbers? Could you maybe incorporate the rescue into that - like each table is a different horse? And then on the other side of it you can put some information about the rescue on it?

catemeg · June 2010

You could also put something on the back of the program, saying "In honor of this special day, the Bride and Groom have made a donation to their favorite charity. The Horse Rescue of Place Location does an amazing job rehabbing horses seized by animal control, and they rely 100% on volunteers and donations! If you want to learn more, visit their website....."

I've seen this before, and I like it!!

oceana919 · June 2010

If you're not doing it as favors, I would put a sign at the entrance of the reception, or a note in the program. If you are doing it as part of the favors, you could easily put cards at each guest's plate explaining that in honor of your guests or in honor of your happy day, you've chosen to donate to...yadda yadda.

nefariousmango · June 2010

Thanks guys, great ideas! One of the ladies who adopted a horse I trained and is a pro artist made us a beautiful horse sculpture as a wedding gift, maybe we can put that on our cake or gift table with a sign/note about the rescue. She'd love that! I also like the idea of doing table numbers as different horses, maybe a little blurb about each horse on it (Eg. "This is Isis, she's been with us for eight years ever since her owner beat her with a tire iron when she wouldn't get in the trailer. As you can see, she's happy and healthy and enjoying her early retirement." I wish our stories were more upbeat, but most of the horses we see have horror stories for backgrounds).

catemeg · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wording-donation-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:72dc36d1-b5d2-4eef-a3c8-4257821a7c12Post:79215bce-2991-44a7-91b7-a617462c040f">Re: Wording for "Donation-Favors"</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks guys, great ideas! One of the ladies who adopted a horse I trained and is a pro artist made us a beautiful horse sculpture as a wedding gift, maybe we can put that on our cake or gift table with a sign/note about the rescue. She'd love that! I also like the idea of doing table numbers as different horses, maybe a little blurb about each horse on it (Eg. "This is Isis, she's been with us for eight years ever since her owner <strong>beat her with a tire iron</strong> when she wouldn't get in the trailer. As you can see, she's happy and healthy and enjoying her early retirement." I wish our stories were more upbeat, but most of the horses we see have horror stories for backgrounds).
Posted by nefariousmango[/QUOTE]

Wow, poor horse!

I don't know if I'd put the sad stories on the tables - putting the horses names for the tables would be a nice touch for sure, but perhaps their stories could be in a book by the statue, so people can look up their horses' story if they want.

If I were at a wedding and they had donated to support horses, I'd think that's great. And if they named the tables after horses, I'd think that was cute. But I would feel sad reading those stories, and I don't think that's the mood you want for your wedding.

nefariousmango · June 2010

Yeah, the happy part is how great they're all doing now! Some of my favorites:

Little Jack, whose eyes were literally popping out of their sockets and you could see every bone in his body, regained his vision and weight and was such a happy boy; Isis was beat within an inch of her life and although she'll never be easy to handle she loves human attention now; Baily is 43 years old, blind, deaf, and has no teeth, she came to us in her late-20s, severely underweight, but now that she gets gallons of "soup" she's so healthy no one can believe she's so old!

Mattie was purchased from a kill buyer by a kindhearted soul who was at auction to buy a mule- the mule was standing over Mattie fending off the kill buyer and wouldn't leave without her! She had strangles, was ~300 lbs underweight, and we guessed she was a yearling until we got her papers and found out she was actually 4, just extremely stunted from starvation. She started training under-saddle last month and has an adoption pending to a fantastic home!

Honey had abcesses in three of her hooves, it was so painful that although she was starving she wouldn't come up to her bucket to eat. She had no reason to trust us, very little handling in her entire life, and yet she let us do everything we needed to do and even came for little walks with a bit of coaxing. She bonded with Bella, who had severe nerve damage to her hind end, and the two of them spend a couple years wandering around the pasture, literally leaning on each other at times, until they both went down and couldn't get back up- Honey two days after Bella.

Right now my fav. pair is Drifter and Stormy- Stormy is an owner surrender due to the economy and has nothing wrong with him, but he's socially awkward and couldn't live with any of the little groups because he kept getting beat up. Drifter is a grumpy old man with pain issues in his front end, and he beat up any horse we put with him so he had to live alone. One day Drifter let himself out of his pen and into Stormy's pen. It's the first time any of us have seen a horse let himself INTO a pen, lol, but they became the best of friends and we certainly would NEVER have put them together!

So as sad as they are, I clearly love the stories :-) Seeing an animal transform like these guys do, from dispondent and fearful to energetic and loving, it's the best feeling in the world!

catemeg · June 2010

Holy cow, that's all amazing! You have every right to be proud of their successes. I'm glad you could be a part of an organization that saves lives!

jeanacorina · June 2010

I love the program note idea. I think that's very appropriate and a lot of people would read it while waiting for the ceremony to begin. GREAT suggestion.

Also, be careful with the sad stories. I've done several advertising projects for school based on the rescue I work with. The ones that always go over best are happy and focus on the good parts. Finding homes, surviving illnesses and injuries because of love and care from the group, etc.

If you put the details (such as the tire iron) in, people's eyes glaze over. They don't want to read about that. They don't want to know. Especially on a happy day like a wedding. They won't be receptive to it.

Focus on the positive. It's a happy day and you've done a very good thing by donating. People WILL be touched. The Sarah Mclachlan animal shelter commercial gets the channel changed every time. People avoid sad stuff.

Ana_2985 · June 2010

I know this is an unpopular opinion on this board, but I don't think there is a way to announce a donation without being AWish. Don't get me wrong, donating to any cause is wonderful but I just don't get the announcement.

There are some cases where I understand the sentiment. For example, the bride's mother passed away right before the wedding, so a donation was made "In Memory Of" her.

I'm not judging you, I'm just giving you my opinion as an outsider. I think the suggestion to add a line about it to the program is the least AWish way to do it.

Edit: I also like the idea of having a framed sign on the guest book table saying something like "In celebration of their marriage, Mango and Mango's have made a donation to X."

catemeg · June 2010

I tend to agree with Ana - the program is a simple way of letting them know. I'd just be afraid with so many details focused towards the horses, it might seem more like the event is about them and the wonderful charity rather than you and your FI's wedding.

nefariousmango · June 2010

So, the guest book table sign seems like the best way to do this, since we don't have room on the program (and we've already printed them). And I agree- the stories are too sad for a wedding, but still I like the idea of horses as table numbers.

Ana- I guess I don't understand why a donation is AWish: On a day that is all about "us" a donation seems like the least AW part of a wedding!

Thanks everyone for your ideas!

chipypony · June 2010

I think being as discrete about it as possible would be better. I think the program idea is best. As a guest if I was bombarded with how great a certain rescue program is I might get a little annoyed. I don't think there is anything wrong with your local horse rescue but there are some "animal rescue" organizations I would not like to be bombarded with and encouraged to support. Its better to not make it seem like a favor which may upset some guests. I love horses and all but I am also not against the consumption of horses for food (to a point) and I support horse auctions. There is a local horse rescue near me that I would rather sell my horse to slaughter than let them have it. but all in all i think that would be a fine idea. I have dealt more with organizations who claim to care about animals than probably your average guest

Ana_2985 · June 2010

I just think that the best good deeds are the ones that no one knows about but you.

IMO, weddings aren't the place to raise awareness about a charity either. But it is your wedding and as long as you know your guests will be comfortable with it then I guess that's fine.

nefariousmango · June 2010

Chipypony- I totally understand where you're coming from, we've had half a dozen horses in the last year alone come from so-called "rescues," I'm very suspicious of these organizations myself! I'm also for the euthanasia of mustangs as pop. control over seeing them all end up in slaughter trucks via loopholes in the current system, which is not a popular position. Mustangs are feral animals, and as much as I love horses I don't understand our need to "protect" a non-native species.

1337love · June 2010

Mango, first off I love that you guys are giving a donation. And I love horses. And I love happy endings. Maybe if you do want people to be able to incorporate that into your theme or let people know about the horses, you could kind of gloss over the most sad bits.

"This is Isis, she's been with us for eight years ever since her owner mistreated her. As you can see, she's now happy and healthy and enjoying her early retirement" makes the point but keeps it upbeat.

Maybe saying something like "In honor of our happy day, we've supporting X rescue which give horses a happily ever after." I think that the people that are close enough to you to be at your wedding would understand that this issue is really close to your heart and that it is a big part of your life. I don't see it any different from people that have WoW or Lord of the RIngs theme weddings. If they want to do it, go for it. I don't think anyone would look at it like a charity ball or anything.

As long as the vows, the toast, and the dancing are about you and FI and not a horse (theme music from SeaBiscuit, toast to Isis, vows to honor, love, cherish, and groom the rescues daily) I think that you will be fine. I like the idea of the sculpture wedding gift display on the guestbook table and maybe a blurb and cute pic printed and put in a picture frame. Also, you could put a small card in front of the sculpture crediting the artist and thanking her for her thoughtful gift.

LOL as a side note, a Lord of the Rings wedding I went to included the poem "One ring to rule them all" in their wedding vows. I was silently laughing so hard from sheer "OMG they so did go there" and suprise that I cried. My friend thought I was just so moved by their vows and I really was. I just was so emotional anyways that "one ring to bring them all and in the darkness, bind them... in the land of Mordor where the shadows lie" just tipped me over the edge.

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