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Words of Wisdom needed .... civil and formal wedding?

scrappiezgrlscrappiezgrl
First Comment First Anniversary
in Military Brides
Hello ladies,

My FI is in the navy and currently on deployment overseas. He has some R & R in december, we wanted to have a civil ceremony on 12/12/12. He is still picking orders, so we don't know where he and I will be stationed next, so we have to wait to have a formal wedding. We can't pick a date or anything for the formal wedding, I guess its a little tough because a day ago we were planning for a formal ceremony this year and now it all stops (it stopped becaue no one on his side of the family would be able to make it in december for a formal wedding). On a good note it gives us time to save more money for the formal ceremony and gives everyone the chance to save the date and come.

Have any of you done this? (civil ceremony first then a formal later?)
Some people tell me to just wait to save then have it all at once because its tacky to do it later. 


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Re: Words of Wisdom needed .... civil and formal wedding?

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    Sammy0709Sammy0709 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Wait and have it all at once. Take it from someone who had a JOP then VR, it's not worth the headache.
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    firemedicrrfiremedicrr
    First Comment
    Hi and welcome.

    What you would be planning would be a vow renewal. You cannot have a civil ceremony and then a formal wedding- your wedding is the day you are legally married. 

    There are lots of people who do civil ceremonies and vow renewals later. The big things to remember are that with a vow renewal, you don't have a bridal shower, a bachelor/bachelorette party (you're already married), you don't register for gifts (again, already married), you don't usually have your father give you away and you don't have a first dance (again, already married). Whatever you do, be sure it is clear to guests that they are attending a vow renewal/post-wedding celebration.

    My advice? Wait and have the wedding you want. You will have lots of time to plan, and the planning will help keep you busy while he is gone. 

    Alternatively, get married and then just have a party to celebrate with your family when he returns if you don't care about having a big wedding... but yes, a lot of people think a vow renewal soon after your wedding is tacky; it's just a "pretty princess day". I don't have a problem with people who do vow renewals; just a problem with people who call it a "formal wedding".... 
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    ZeldakinsZeldakins member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    Agree with PP's, just wait to have your "big" day. It's what FI and I decided to do, but of course we gotta be flexible with the dates since we don't know yet if a deployment is in the near future.

    Just keep an open mind and don't shun the idea of waiting.

     These ladies always have great advice to give, stick around. :)
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    ReeseCup21ReeseCup21
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    What are your reasons for wanting to get married during R&R? If it is for benefits or something, that makes sense but if it is to do it just because, then just wait.
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    Sammy0709Sammy0709 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Getting married for benefits doesn't make sense. It's tacky. This may have already been said but TK mobile sucks.
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    ggirl2001ggirl2001 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    In Response to Re:Words of Wisdom needed .... civil and formal wedding?:[QUOTE]What are your reasons for wanting to get married during Ramp;R? If it is for benefits or something, that makes sense but if it is to do it just because, then just wait. Posted by ReeseCup21[/QUOTE]
    This is in TK's alternate universe but this is the stupidest thing I've read here in a while.
    image
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