What would you do?

melb2013 · November 2012

We only have two people in our WP- my man of honor and FI's best woman. My man of honor came to me and said he wanted to throw us a joint bachelor/bachelorette party in March or April. This is his plan- he wants to take about 10 people or so out to a nice dinner and then after we could all go to a bar where more people could meet us if we want. He wants to pay for everyone's dinner.

I would feel badly having him pay so much for a bach party- he is already flying up to Boston from Florida to do this and then again the next month for the wedding. He's insisting, though. Here's what I want to know: if you were invited to such a dinner for a bach party, wouldn't you assume you were at least paying for yourself, if not also contributing to the bride and groom? I know I would. I'm just curious to see what other people would think.

maggieandrey · November 2012

Ditto PP. I'd expect that the group would cover your meal.

I've only been to one bachelorette party. FI was the best man at the wedding, that's the only reason I know the bride. We actually chipped in to cover the bride and the MOH who had paid for our hotel rooms.

Sharpschruter22 · November 2012

If its a party the wedding party is throwing the couple, I would expect to pay for my meal and part of the couples. That's very nice of him.

lyndausvi · November 2012

I think I would expect to pay.

However, we have some big spenders in our group who pick up tabs. So it's not uncommon in our group for that to happen. When it does happen we just picked up the tab (or at least a round or 2) at the bar..

AimeeRab · November 2012

I would expect to pay and then contribute toward the meals and drinks for the bride and groom. He seems like a really nice guy.

itzMS · November 2012

In my circle, dinner is usually paid for on an individual basis.

Most times, we have all meet up at the host/hostess house prior to, and they have some snacks/appetizers/drinks available.

achiduck · November 2012

I would expect to pay for my dinner.

FWIW, at my bachelorette the attendee's paid for themselves and my 4 BMs split the cost of my dinner/drinks between them evenly.

coopsbaby · November 2012

I would expect to at least pay for myself, but that's how our circle usually does things.

jessicabessica · November 2012

I would expect to pay for myself. I don't think you should worry about how he spends his money, though. It sounds really nice and generous of him. Write him a heartfelt TY note.

lyndausvi · November 2012

I want to say I would also not worry about him picking up the tap. Many BM's through shower/b-partys that cost a few hundred (some times more in some cases) where food and drinks are provided.

I feel like this is the same situtation.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · November 2012

If I were invited to a dinner/party formally, I would not expect to pay.

If it was a casual FB invite or word of mouth "hey we're getting together to go out for dinner this date" then I'd probably expect to pay for myself.

I have not been to a party where the group covers the bride. Either the bride pays her own way or the host covers the bride.

melb2013 · November 2012

Thanks girls. I have no intention of telling him to pay or not, was just curious as to what others would expect to do as a guest to such a party. Yes, he's a very nice and generous guy!

aquari0216 · November 2012

I need a friend like him lol!

What would you do?

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