hair/makeup

a+b=u&me3912 · February 2012

How many of you are paying for your girls hair and makeup?Despite what the etiquette is, are you doing this as part of their bridal party gift?

I only have two girls in my bridal party. Makeup is $50, and hair is $85. My dad's girlfriend is a hairdresser, and she says she is only going to do my hair, and she isn't charging me. But, she refuses to do the other girls hair..... so with that said, my MOH knows a girl for hair, and is available. My other BM is complaining saying that she wants to go with her hair and makeup person, who is charging $25 for makeup but $115 for hair! I am getting to stressed about them saying it is a lot of money. My BM is saying she just spent $50 for alterations on her dress, and its going to cost about $50 for manicure/ pedicure.... Not to sound like a bridezilla, but they knew when I asked them to be in it, that being in a wedding doesn't necessarily mean that it won't cost money. My MOH said to me, "since BM can't really afford it, maybe you (meaning me) should pay for her to get it done by the girl I know." So I said "If I pay for her, it wouldn't be fair if I didn't pay for you as well." So she said, "Ok well if you do that then that would be our bridal party gift." I told her I needed to think about it. I was not prepared for this. That would be $270 for both of them, plus $50 for my own makeup, plus tip.... I don't know what to do. Also, again, I know the etiquette of a bridal party gift is supposed to not be anything wedding day related. There's only 12 days left....

rachel801231 · February 2012

I wish I could afford to pay for all my girls to have their hair and makeup done but it's just not in the budget. I've left it up to them whether or not they want to have their hair done or maybe have a friend do it for them. The style is completely up to them as well because they are paying for it. Maybe you could do this as well. I told my girls where and when I have my hair done and if they wanted they could call and make an appointment but again it was up to them. They all know hair and nails are entirely up to them. My aunt use to do makeup so she has offered to come in and help them with makeup if the wish.

As far as part of the gift, I wouldn't do this unless you plan on getting them something else that is tangible. You can't keep and updo!

HobokensFury · February 2012

As long are you are not requiring your girls to get their hair and makeup done you don't have to pay for them.

a+b=u&me3912 · February 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_march-2012-weddings_hairmakeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:955e4823-0be1-44ef-9ee7-99a63794e103Discussion:c55bba79-379b-4505-87d5-b6334031ba52Post:1b93be8f-c537-4935-b1cf-6c4ba30ca607">Re: hair/makeup</a>:
[QUOTE] <strong>As far as part of the gift, I wouldn't do this unless you plan on getting them something else that is tangible. You can't keep and updo!</strong>
Posted by rachel801231[/QUOTE]

I know!!! Thats wjy I am so stressed and sad about it. I did tell them it was not a MUST do to get their hair, nails, and makeup done. I just said that they needed to look nice, nails could be painted clear or colored and filed, and they could do their own makeup and hair if they wanted. My MOH said from the beginning that she would get it all done professionally anyway. My BM said from the beginning that she wasn't sure. Then when they were together at David's Bridal getting their gowns, my MOH was talking to my BM about it, and then BM said she wanted to do it too. (This was about a month ago) Now that its 12 days away, they are saying its all so expensive. I honestly can't afford to pay for both of them, or all of it. I might be able to swing paying for makeup ($50 each) and then a small gift, but I was not prepared for this. I just feel so stressed about. Also, I can't pay for one, and not the other, thats just unfair! So..... I really don't know what to do at this point. I told my MOH that I would remind my BM that she doesn't really NEED to do all of it, if she really cannot afford it. But, my MOH says that would be rude because it would make her feel bad that she can't afford it. I don't get it! I feel like FI and I are spending SO much on our wedding to begin with, and this is extra costs that I was not prepared for, and now I don't know where I am going to come up with the extra cash. I just feel stressed out!

scooterpie7 · February 2012

We ARE actually paying for our BMs hair, makeup and dresses. It was actually a gift from my mother as there is no way I could afford six BM dresses and all of our hair and makeup. I agree that if you aren't requiring them to have it done, you don't need to pay. Just say to her "Look, I know costs are really adding up. Please don't feel you have to have your hair and makeup done professionally. I know you are more thna capable of looking beautiful on your own!" or something like that.

cmac3504 · February 2012

I know this is against etiquette, but I personally don't see anything wrong with not giving a tangible and/or NWR gift to a BM... especially if they ask! It sounds like they'd prefer getting those services done but just can't afford it. I think that's better than giving something that will collect dust, ya know? I know all of those costs would add up a lot but I say do what you can and otherwise tell them they don't have to get anything done for the wedding. GL!

EBDG · February 2012

i've been in weddings where i have had to pay for both my hair and make up. for my wedding, i am paying for the girls makeup and they are paying for their own hair. no one has complained at all. my gift to them will be about $150 total, including personal gifts for them and the makeup. i figured i would spend about what they did on their dresses. that being said, it is whatever you can afford and make the day meaningful that matters.

southerncharm24 · February 2012

im paying for everyone's hair. I'm getting married in the middle of nowhere, Everyone has travel fees and miniumum price requirements. In order to meet those requirements and to allow us to relax all day, I'm paying. It is not apart of their gifts, but I knew this from the beginning so I worked it into the budget.

Can you talk to your dad's girlfriend? Explain the situation? Maybe she will be willing to help?

a+b=u&me3912 · February 2012

Thanks everyone. I think I am going to try to put in our budget a way to at least pay for their makeup.I wish I could afford to pay for it all, but I just can't. I also like how ScooterPie7 phrased it, about telling them they could look beautiful in their own way. I feel better than I did before! I appreciate all the advice!

jbrook12 · February 2012

I am not paying for my girls to get their hair done. I left it up to them if they wanted to get it done or not. My MOH and I have the same stylist so we are going to her salon and one BM is going with us. The other BM is going to have her sister do it who is a stylist. As for make-up my MOH is doing hers and mine that day. One BM doesn't wear make-up and that is fine with me and the other will do her own.

bstengler · February 2012

I am not paying for the girls hair or make up. But I am leaving it up to them if they want either service done. But try to look at it as every girl Likes to pamper herself sometimes so they might not mind paying for the services

andreamarie77 · February 2012

I'm paying for all my girls' hair and makeup, but just because it was in our budget and I wanted to do something nice for them. Their makeup will pretty much look the same, but they can do their hair anyway they want.

Since you didn't tell your girls that hair and makeup had to be done professionally, it's their choice if they want to do that and you are under no obligation to pay for it. For the ones complaining that it's too expensive, just tell her to not get it all done then. She needs to stop saying it's too much money if she's the one who wants it done and not you.

Don't stress - you have enough to think about!

bdgrl73 · February 2012

I'm not paying for hair/makeup either..but, I gave them all of the info, prices,and what not, that I received..and left it up to them. Some will be along when I get mine done and others have other arrangements..I know each of them are particular about their makeup and hair, and I know that they will all be beautiful, so I'm not worried

4n6chick · February 2012

I'm not paying for hair & makeup and I'm not making it mandatory. However, they all said they wanted it and my hairdresser recommended someone for the makeup, so we got a package deal for five people (including my mom). I'm paying a deposit when I go in for my hair trial/color touch-up and it's going to be for the cost of my hair and makeup plus another $100 for a tip; the tip will be for all the girls and that way if they want to just add another $5 or so instead of having to tip 20%. One girl had balked at the price for the makeup and was just going to do her own, until she went with me for the trial and LOVED the way the woman did her makeup. That was a relief, as my Matron of honor had already negotiated the price down $125 from the original quote.

I'd just tell them that if it's too expensive you don't mind them doing it themselves. I wouldn't pay if it's not really in your budget.

a+b=u&me3912 · February 2012

Thanks again everyone, you are all so helpful! I told her that she will look beautiful no matter which way she chooses to go, makeup done, or not done professionally. I talked to my FI about it. He said to offer to pay the $25 difference, if thats the problem. (She is saying she can't afford the $50 for makeup - and knows a girl that would do it for $25.) I might just do that, if she really does want to get it done. I can't stress about it. I have enough to think about!! Thanks again, for all the advice!!

hair/makeup

Re: hair/makeup

Choose Another Board

Search Boards