Plus-Sized

BRIDAL SHOWER EMBARRASMENT???Invitations......HELPPPP!

Wedding April 13,2013
IM PLUS SIZE!
I really dont feel comfortable w/ppl trying to purchase LINGERIE on my behalf as a gift. Then I' d ahve to hold it up in front of everyone..SO EMBARRISING especially if its 5x bigger than what I actually am.
Plus it'll be "SKINNY" ppl making these purchases...
IS IT RUDE TO ASK GUEST NOT TO PURCHASE APPAREL/UNDER GARMENTS FOR ME?
IF I DID DO THAT, HOW WOULD I WORD IT ON THE BRIDAL SHOWER INVITES?
HELLLPPPPPPPPPPP!

Re: BRIDAL SHOWER EMBARRASMENT???Invitations......HELPPPP!

  • QueerFemmeQueerFemme member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_plus-sized_bridal-shower-embarrasmentinvitationshelpppp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:973cdc6f-961e-4fb0-a628-bef2bb559697Discussion:8a64d628-88c9-461f-919f-fbfa7785186cPost:b75ab621-f26c-49fb-929c-208fd0d524b4">BRIDAL SHOWER EMBARRASMENT???Invitations......HELPPPP!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wedding April 13,2013 IM PLUS SIZE! I really dont feel comfortable w/ppl trying to purchase LINGERIE on my behalf as a gift. Then I' d ahve to hold it up in front of everyone..SO EMBARRISING especially if its 5x bigger than what I actually am. Plus it'll be "SKINNY" ppl making these purchases... IS IT RUDE TO ASK GUEST NOT TO PURCHASE APPAREL/UNDER GARMENTS FOR ME? IF I DID DO THAT, HOW WOULD I WORD IT ON THE BRIDAL SHOWER INVITES? HELLLPPPPPPPPPPP!
    Posted by stevens23146[/QUOTE]

    Honestly, most people don't buy lingerie for bridal showers, unless it's specified as a lingerie party.  Who is hosting the party for you?  You could ask that person to spread the word that you'd rather they not purchase intimate garments for you. 
  • ellie63ellie63 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2012
    I completely understand. Cmg is right, most people won't buy lingerie unless its a lingerie shower. Are you registered somewhere? That info may help someone choose a more appropriate gift. I was given a lingerie shower by my closest friends. Some of it fit, some, we'll... I just figure he loves me for who I am and whatever it is probably wont stay on very long anyways!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_plus-sized_bridal-shower-embarrasmentinvitationshelpppp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:973cdc6f-961e-4fb0-a628-bef2bb559697Discussion:8a64d628-88c9-461f-919f-fbfa7785186cPost:b75ab621-f26c-49fb-929c-208fd0d524b4">BRIDAL SHOWER EMBARRASMENT???Invitations......HELPPPP!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wedding April 13,2013 IM PLUS SIZE! I really dont feel comfortable w/ppl trying to purchase LINGERIE on my behalf as a gift. Then I' d ahve to hold it up in front of everyone..SO EMBARRISING especially if its 5x bigger than what I actually am. Plus it'll be "SKINNY" ppl making these purchases... IS IT RUDE TO ASK GUEST NOT TO PURCHASE APPAREL/UNDER GARMENTS FOR ME? IF I DID DO THAT, HOW WOULD I WORD IT ON THE BRIDAL SHOWER INVITES? HELLLPPPPPPPPPPP!
    Posted by stevens23146[/QUOTE]

    <div>Without knowing the people you're inviting, I'd say you're getting worried for nothing.  Most relatives (unless they're REALLY close) won't buy that stuff for you, and if there are a few friends you're worried about, just have whoever is throwing the shower pass along word-of-mouth that you'd prefer the gifts to be family environment-appropriate. Chances are "skinny" people who are part of the invite list but not close to you would be equally uncomfortable buying something like that for <em>anyone</em> that didn't have specific sizes listed-- not just plus size ladies.</div><div>
    </div><div>However, if you do find yourself in that position, I think you should be as graceful and tactful as you can.  Laugh off the gift instead of getting mad or flustered (remember: unless it's worn, you CAN return it for something you like, so who cares if it's the wrong size? And if someone gives you something worn, that's nasty, but I digress...).  Most of all, realize that they're not doing it to make fun of you-- the gifts are coming from a place of love.  They aren't making a statement of how they look at and feel about you as a person if they buy you something too big or small.  It's not a "skinny" person making fun of a "fat" person.  </div><div>
    </div>
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I have only seen someone get lingerie once at their shower and it was a long white nightgown and I have been to many many showers.  I wouldn't worry about it to much.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Don't do a lingerie shower.

    There are many other themes, and you can talk to your MOH about those themes.  See below:

    http://wedding.theknot.com/bridesmaids-mother-of-the-bride/bridal-shower-ideas.aspx

  • Thank you all SO MUCH! I really appreciate the feedback and now that Im thinking about it, I guess I was over analyzing just a bit much! Thanks for all of the suggestions, I will for sure speak w/my MOH about this.
  • I'm not really crazy about having lingerie purchased for me either, and I know there are some people in my circles who make that their "standard" bridal shower gift.  I'm particular about what I do (and don't) want to wear in that realm, and most of what Victoria's Secret (the go-to shop in this area) has either won't fit me properly or is really, really not my taste. There's only so much you can do, but usually people planning to buy something like that will want to know your sizes (in general and bra/panty) and will contact the shower-giver, your sister/SIL or someone they know in your wedding party to ask.  So I'd let those people know that you'd prefer to buy your own lingerie/prefer something off your registry/etc.

    I'm planning to do that ... mostly in the form of not giving out my size information and letting my shower planners know that I'm really, really excited about what's on my registry.  I did finally find a website with plenty that I like (womanwithin.com), so I'll give my MOH and SIL that info too, should someone be really insistent.
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