Undecided...

Re: Undecided...

• roseofdeborah

  

  June 2012

  I'll let others talk about how you can't re-do your wedding. My opinion would be if you want to get married in September have a small ceremony/court house or whatever you choose. You can then have a party for your 10 year anniversary, but it would not be another wedding party but an anniversary party as your wedding has already passed. If you really want the whole wedding "experience" then wait until you can afford to do it all at once.

  

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• sdolce member

  

  June 2012

  Thanks for the kind reply. I do like the idea of having a private wedding this September. Since FH and I are private people with a big family. However I do want to have a party with the family but cost is probably the main factor let alone the 3 month window to plan. I'm thinking plan A with a vow renewal and party on our 10 year. How does that sound?

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• *Barbie* member

  

  June 2012

  why don't you just wait and get married and have the party on your 10 year anniversary?

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• sdolce member

  

  June 2012

  That would be the best scenario I think but FH hasn't had insurance due to being self employed. Although I can say he's gone this long without it what's another year? These are the undecided decisions I'm trying to make and they're hard!!

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• pomundson0 member

  

  July 2012 edited July 2012

  hmmm good question  Here's one for you... are you personally in a position where you can take on the work of planning a wedding in three months or would to totally burn you out?  I'm kind of partial to sharing the day with friends and family and making a celebration of it, but if something more intimate is more your style, that's cool too It's just up to you if you can plan everything in a few months or if you need more time.  A vow renewal after one year seems kinda short to me, I'd think that would be more for the milestone years (20, 30, etc from the wedding date).  If you do the big party/wedding in one year, do you know if you will get any financial help from parents? It could be fun to have more time to spend with friends and family to plan everything out and making it less stressful. Just a few ideas  I wish you luck with your decision!

  

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• sdolce member

  

  July 2012

  In Response to Re:Undecided...:[QUOTE]hmmm good question : nbsp;Here's one for you... are you personally in a position where you can take on the work of planning a wedding in three months or would to totally burn you out? nbsp;I'm kind of partial to sharing the day with friends and family and making a celebration of it, but if something more intimate is more your style, that's cool too : It's just up to you if you can plan everything in a few months or if you need more time. nbsp;A vow renewal after one year seems kinda short to me, I'd think that would be more for the milestone years 20, 30, etc from the wedding date. nbsp;If you do the big party/wedding in one year, do you know if you will get any financial help from parents? It could be fun to have more time to spend with friends and family to plan everything out and making it less stressful. Just a few ideas : nbsp;I wish you luck with your decision! :D Posted by pomundson0[/QUOTE]
  
  I'm pretty confident I could pull off a wedding in 3 months, however the funds aren't there for what I would want. An elopement sounds nice and simple but after figuring a private chef for 10 guest, photographer and a simple dress...everything really adds up. Even for a party of 10. A photographer is something I'm not willing to budge on. So I'm thinking it might be best to wait another year and plan it on our 10 year anniversary. I just don't want to wait another year!! I feel like I'm to the point where I just want it over with...

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• katehar01 member

  

  July 2012

  I can't imagine how frustrating it will be to have to postpone...but it seems like you know that's the best option, OP.  If you wanted a simple affair in 3 months, that'd be fine, but it sounds like you want a bigger event - and that's perfectly fine!  But you really need to be honest with yourself about what you and your FI want, so you don't make a rash decision that you regret.  GL!  I'm sure your wedding will be beautiful, whatever you decide.

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• runpipparun member

  

  July 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_undecided-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:8a690b93-c935-4d05-9e09-df265c88b527Post:cea96f0c-4e3f-4396-8af9-b2e3ebe77207">Undecided...</a>:
  [QUOTE]Hi. Just hoping to get some opinions. FH and I just cant decide on plan A or B. Some insight or advice would be great. FH and I have been dating for 9 years this September. He proposed last July right after our sons birth. <strong>Plan A: On our 9 year anniversary FH, our son and I will have a courthouse wedding or something small somewhere private with a hired photographer and dinner. Then the following September on our 10 year anniversary of dating we have a big party/wedding at my grandparents ranch. I like this idea because it will be somewhat cost friendly but I'm unsure if we should just elope this September and tell our families or if its too tacky to even have a party a year after... </strong>Plan B: To just throw together a wedding by this September and celebrate at my grandparents ranch. My concernes are its too soo. But it would be nice to have it over with :-/ What do you think? Thank you in advance!
  Posted by sdolce[/QUOTE]<div>
  </div><div>If you have a courthouse wedding on your 9th, you should call your 10th a vow renewal or an anniversary party or just a party, because you're already married. Do not call it a wedding. Because you're already married. Getting into a wedding dress and acting out a wedding when you're already married is awkward and silly, because you're already married.</div><div>
  </div><div>Just sayin'.
  
  </div>

  

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• seesawgirl member

  

  July 2012

  Here's an idea...I get that your dating anniversary is important and special, but what if you find a venue that you love, and it's not available for that day? Or if a VIP guest already has a vacation planned for that time, etc? These things happen, and it's kind of a small reason to postpone a wedding for so long, just because that is your anniversary. Why not just pick another day in between your now and then? You would be in more of a position to save and plan, yet you wouldn't have to wait over a year to be married. Your dating anniversary can, and still will be special to you, and please don't think I'm trying say its not, it just sounds like since neither option (9 or 10 year anniversary) is very ideal for you, then you should find a happy medium.

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