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Timeframe for mailing invitations - need asap!

beabeamimsbeabeamims
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
We have about 12 - 15 invitations that we had a difficult time confirming addresses, therefore, they didn't go out with the bulk of the invitations.  Wedding is 3/24; response card deadline is 2/24.  These invitations won't get mailed until today/tomorrow (2/23 and 2/24). 

Question: Do we include response card which clearly indicates that we've missed "our" deadline or do we just mail the invitations without the response card and hope they contact us via phone/family member confirming their attendance?

I hate that these were overlooked and I want them to have an invitation but by including the response card they may know they were overlooked.  BUT, by not including the response card it messes with the numbers that I have to supply to the caterer (I'm the mother of the bride). 

Appreciate a response from anyone with etiquette knowledge on such matters!

Thanks!
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Re: Timeframe for mailing invitations - need asap!

  • chelseamb11chelseamb11 member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    I'd put the response card in, or even make a few new ones with a date of them being due at the end of next week so they know how pressing it is that they send it back.  If they don't have the response card, they're not going to know how to respond. 
     
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  • mica178mica178 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    Could you make new RSVP cards (you could probably do things online with fedex/kinkos with less than 24 hour turnaround) with a new RSVP date for these?  Also, it'd be helpful to contact those 12-15 households to let them know that the invitations are on their way and apologize for their late arrival.
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  • Avion22Avion22 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    I think it's okay to call these people and tell them that their invitation is on the way, you were just waiting to confirm their address.  Then line through the original date on the response card and write in a new date -- or give them the option of calling or emailing you.

    We're getting married 4/7 and our RSVP date is 3/10.  We sent out some invitations that got returned for incorrect addresses, so we had to track down the correct one and send out new invitatios.  We just called these people to let them know about the mix up.
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  • mbodymbody
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    I'd create new RSVP cards with a later RSVP date on it. I don't think I would send the RSVP cards with a date that has already passed.


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  • aragx6aragx6 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I'm guessing you don't have these people's phone numbers because you had such trouble getting their addresses, right? If so, I'd get new RSVP cards made up if at all possible. If you send them out with the date already past they're definitely going to think they were B-listed.
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  • brittneyh4brittneyh4
    100 Comments
    I'm with PPs, if you can get a new rsvp card that would be best. If you had a hard time getting a hold of them for their address, I would start the follow up quickly so you don't have to scramble last minute.
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  • StephBeanWed61502StephBeanWed61502 member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Definitely get a new RSVP card if you can.  If you can't, either call to let them know what happened so they'll know they weren't B-listed (if you have their phone numbers) or maybe include an additional note in the invitation apologizing for the lateness.
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  • dori851dori851 member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_timeframe-for-mailing-invitations-need-asap?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:6d2994fe-e922-46c8-ac0c-9f6a12d06f76Post:4d35544e-f8e6-4921-9bc9-1e0c39ff90ce">Re: Timeframe for mailing invitations - need asap!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'd create new RSVP cards with a later RSVP date on it. I don't think I would send the RSVP cards with a date that has already passed.
    Posted by mbody[/QUOTE]

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  • MyUserName1MyUserName1 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    I'd definitely drop in a note explaining why their invitations are so late so they don't think that they are B-listed.  Especially since I assume you don't have their phone numbers (because why would it have been so difficult to confirm addresses if you had the phone number).  If you can get new response cards made that would be ideal, otherwise indicate in the note when you need their RSVPs by
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  • chrmunchrmun member
    500 Comments

    Cough*B-list*cough

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  • Kate61487Kate61487 member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 250 Love Its Name Dropper
    New RSVP card or not you need to include a note or make a phone call to explain why they're so late.  Even if you make the RSVP date 3/10, receiving an invitation 3-4 weeks before the wedding is going to make them feel b-listed.

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