Dress Stress

sssdee · October 2012

Hey Ladies,

I'm finding it to be a difficult task to choose a dress. I have narrowed it down to a few dresses (from visiting many stores - my poor BM's haha) but I haven't felt like I've found THE one yet.

Of the ones I like, they all vary in design and style so I think that's what makes it harder. I'm comfortable in all of them, so I can't knock out any for that reason, and budget isn't that big of a concern to choose one over the others...

The ones that I thought I am looking for (and like) I don't feel 100% committed to them and then there are complete opposities that I thought I'd never wear and I put it on and it's very pretty, flattering but I don't know if I can 'see' myself walking down the aisle with it. I'm just really conflicted and I'm probably making this a thousand times harder on myself.

A small part of it is that I'm not all that happy with the extra weight I've put on recently (I yo-yo like no tomorrow) so I think that may play a part as well. I've gone up a size and just feel yucky (Yes - I've reactivated my gym pass and dusting off my runners to get out of the funk lol)

For those who have chosen your dress already - was it easy to choose if you had a couple you really liked?

(This turned out way longer than I anticipated... Sorry for the rambling)

CN:
Basically, if you liked multiple dresses, with very different looks - how did you come to your decision?

Lnodes · October 2012

Much like you, my weight has also always been up and down. I knew going in I wanted to feel comfortable in the dress, so I made sure to go to dress stores that specifically carried bigger sizes. Also, I never got that 'AH HA' moment that I just KNEW it was my dress. I didn't cry or get emotional like the tv/magazine hype tells brides they are supposed to feel. For me, I couldn't stop smiling and I didn't want to get out of the dress. That's what made me decide, ultimately.
Maybe you are just on dress overload. Trying too many on at a time or near each other can kind of make them all blur together. Maybe try going back in a week and see how you feel or try different stores. GL! Keep us posted

QueerFemme · October 2012

I never got weepy or overly emotional with my dress selection, and honestly, I made myself NUTS for 5 months worrying if I had made the right choice. I went shopping again and again, even after I bought my dress, and even bought a second dress from a sample sale.

But, when it came time to do alterations, I went with my original dress. There are always bunches of dresses that will look good on you. If you are a logical person, like me, you will end up making lists of the pros and cons of each dress, and you likely won't get that "say yes to the dress" tear jerker moment.

I would suggest maybe going to one more appointment, try on the few that you know you already like, and maybe a couple more, and then start trying to narrow it down. Does it fit your venue style, does it fit your body shape, is it the most flattering, how much does it cost? Do you like this one WAY more than that one, if THAT one is significantly more epensive. Is this one going to be a lot hotter than that one? Is this one easier to dance in or sit down in?

Some of us have to just start weeding things out logically, that may be your best bet.

Here is the dress I ended up with, which was my original choice... and I'm happy I kept it.

entropicbeauty · October 2012

I had a very hard time choosing a dress, I ultimately went with a dress that everyone seemed to like and it fit my criteria. I loved the idea of my dress and I looked good in it, but I wasn't "in love" with my dress....but I guess some of us just never are.

I'm also someone who went into it knowing I wasn't going to keep the dress, so that might have colored my experience.

ellie63 · October 2012

I ordered a DB dress online that was very simple and a similar cut to. Dress or two I already wear. When I put it on it just felt comfortable and pretty and simple and ME. It felt right, though I didn't have any tears or any kind of emotional moment. Hmmmmm....thinking I haven't tried it on in a couple months....I'll be right back....!

sssdee · October 2012

Sorry for the P&R! I posted and read some replies afterwards but at the time I had nothing positive to say and didn't want to be a grumpy gus lol

I was stressed out to no tomorrow with the dress hunt.

Lnodes - I think a combo of trying on too many may have been a small issue. I had it narrowed down to 6 that I liked and I would be "happy" wearing, but I didn't feel that they were "me" and that they were safe choices.

Cmg - I love your dress! It looks great and the detail is beautiful! Mentally, I was in my head trying to narrow down the choices by trying to eliminate this but it was proving to be difficult. I also thought they all looked very nice but I had this one dress that I visioned myself in but had yet to find it and I think that was part of the hesitation and stress, worrying and more!

Soooooooo the good news. After my break down... I finally think I found THE dress!!!

I wanted to go to one more store that was out of town (And carried a bridal designer I saw online and liked) so I finally made an appointment as I knew I wanted to just be done with it all. I went in there not thinking I'd like anything. I tried on a couple dresses and it was similar to the previous ones I tried on and liked. I tried on one that had alot of the things I wanted in a dress then I turned around to look at my butt and laughed. The pick ups on the dress bunched around my butt to make it look even bigger then just dropped down to straight lines (no pick ups) it looked odd and I knew I would be always annoyed with the back. So I was like nope, not the one. Then one of my BMs asked the staff if they had anything similar but full pick ups on the back and train. The lady disappeared for quite some time but came back with 2 dresses and asked which I wanted to try on first. The one that I tried on first was just what I was looking for and envisioned myself walking down the aisle with!!!
It went with the venue, my overall vision, and I LOVED it (At that point it was the 1st dress I said I loved and my MoH and BM started screaming in excitement since I finally said I loved a dress haha) They started crying and I faced away from them so they didnt make me cry haha.
I tried on the other dress and while it was also really pretty, I felt the first one was THE one. I honestly didnt want to get out of it. And like one of you said, it'll be the one you don't want to get out of haha.

Thank you guys sooo much for calming me down and making me feel "normal" for not having the same feelings/reaction/thoughts that everyone says we're supposed to have lol.

Dress Stress

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