How much time to spend with each guest?

That Gal · December 2011

We are having around 190 guests at our wedding (2 weeks away).. I plan on greeting everyone but I also want to be able to have fun, dance, eat and enjoy my wedding day without spending hours simply greeting everyone. At the same time, I don't want anyone to feel like they'e getting stiffed if we don't have a full out conversation. How did everyone handle this on their wedding day? Thanks

Mrs.B6302007 · December 2011

If you do table visits, you can cover more ground in less time than trying to speak to each individual guest/couple. You can chat with the whole table (in general, not super detailed conversations obviously) for about 2-3 minutes or so. Just ask if everyone's having a good time, make some specific conversation if possible (Aunt Jo, I thought about you the other day when I saw....) and be sure to thank everyone. Don't have to feel like you need to have one-on-one conversations all night - no one will expect that of you. They will just want a quick hello/hug/thankyou.

Mrs.B6302007 · December 2011

The other benefit of doing table visits vs. a traditional receiving line is that YOU control the pacing of your rounds. It sucks being behind the super chatty guests in a receiving line who want to reminisce about every thing and hold up the line. ;-)

That Gal · December 2011

Thanks! This makes me feel a lot better .. I was getting anxious haha

froggatt.clare · December 2011

I will totally ditto Mrs. B about table visits. We just had our engagement party (hosted by parents) - it was family only and still 30+ people showed up. I did my best to greet everyone when they arrived, but after eating I made sure to see each table for a few moments. Totally repeating that one on the wedding day!

Mrs.B6302007 · December 2011

Oh, and if someone is really dying to stand around and talk with you, they will come find you.
;-)

MrsBee11 · December 2011

We waited until just after dinner to go around and say hello to everyone and I'd say we spent a a couple of minutes at each table (we had 12 total). We only missed about half of our cocktail hour for pictures, so we had a solid 20-30 minutes of chatting with people during the rest of it and a few people came up to us while we were seated at our table as well.

There's no set amount of time you have to spend with people, just decide on a time when you'd like to greet people and go with it. You can even go to one half of the room and chat, sit down for dinner, and then visit the other half afterward. Whatever feels comfortable for you.

Kate61487 · December 2011

We had just under 300 guests, we did table visits (tables of 10) and managed to visit every guest during dinner. We got to the cocktail hour with about 20 minutes left, but by the time I was bustled I only had about 5 minutes before we were lining up for our entrance (H meanwhile was visiting and getting apps - stupid bustle, haha).

We sat down, did the toasts, salad was served. H and I each took a bite and then I looked at him and said "I'm not really gonna miss the iceburg, do you want to start table visits?" We probably only spent 2 min at each table, but we individually greeted and hugged each guest, did some basic chatting ("heard traffic was awful! so glad you made it"; also answered a LOT of honeymoon questions). By the time we finished the last hugs we were saying our goodbyes ("hope to chat more later!" or "hope to see you on the dance floor later" depending on the group) and off to the next table. We'd finished I think 18 tables when we saw our dinner had been served, so we went back and ate. After we finished we got back up and did the remaining 12 - since we were served first most of our guests were still eating. We finished up just as they were clearing plates and opening up the sundae bar so it worked wonderfully. Don't worry, it can be done :-)

hboo2011 · December 2011

We had 215 guests at our wedding. Our ceremony led right into our cocktail hour, and we had seen each other before the ceremony and gotten ALL pics out of the way, so we were able to chat with guests during the entire 35-40 minute cocktail hour. That helped a bunch.

But above advise is good. We did still go to almost all of the tables to say hi again, but didn't feel too bad that we only stayed for a minute or two because like I said, we did see a lot of people during the cocktail hour.

fluttaby32 · December 2011

im worried about this too.. FI is an extremely chatty person and doesn't like being pulled away from conversations!

MyNameIsNot · December 2011

We also did table visits. We had about 12 tables. H and I scarfed down a few bites of food (we were served first) while the rest of the guests were getting served. Then we spent the dinner hour circulating. We spent 3-4 minutes per table, just enough to thank people for coming and be sure we talked to everyone.

Budnotes · December 2011

We did a traditional receiving line at the reception (not the church) as the guests were making their way from the cocktail hour to the reception. We were able to greet each of our guests individually and give them each a little one-on-one attention. Later in the evening - after dinner, some dancing, etc. we walked around and visited tables. I was glad we did the receiving line though because some guests left early or we were interrupted and didn't get to every table.

vegasgroom · December 2011

I'm definitely a fan of table visits. We had about 110 guests and there was more than enough time to grab a few bites of dinner then hit each table and greet/hug each guest at each table. It let the guests have time to eat, no standing in a line forever, no delay on the night's festivities.

I was at a wedding two weeks ago with close to 200, they did a receiving line, I was in the back so basically I stood in line for 45 minutes while everyone that had made it inside had cocktails...

TruthWithin · December 2011

I am kind of worried about this too. We are doing the traditional way of having our pictures between the ceremony and reception and I am not sure how we should greet everyone. Going around to each table sounds like a good plan..... but any ideas?

em01092 · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_much-time-spend-guest?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:98c9a49b-cba8-445d-b58a-384dea843724Post:47d38a9f-8054-4ba6-8d37-618aee0ca1f0">Re: How much time to spend with each guest?</a>:
[QUOTE]I am kind of worried about this too. We are doing the traditional way of having our pictures between the ceremony and reception and I am not sure how we should greet everyone. Going around to each table sounds like a good plan..... but any ideas?
Posted by TruthWithin[/QUOTE]

<div>Could you do photos of you with your family/WP and your FI and his family/WP separately before the ceremony? This cuts down a lot on time in between, because all that is left is ones of you together, together with your familes, and together with the WP. I would then make sure you and your FI are served food first, and then just go around from table to table as people finish up. </div>

LittleMissCutiePie · January 2012

Many will argue that you need to take equal time for each and every guest. But in reality, that's not very possible. Especially since there are certain guests that feel like they deserve more of your time. If you do table visits, you are less likely to ignore certain guests, and those that want to monopolize your time have less of an opportunity if you speak to them in a group setting, and they see that you clearly are busy. Many guests also recognize that if you have almost 200 people at your wedding, it's almost possible to give everyone an equal share of your time. Just make sure you at least say hello to everyone, and you'll be good.

That Gal · January 2012

Thanks everyone This eases some of my fears. Just don't want to be done saying hi and the night to be over!

jblfu82 · January 2012

One of the best pieces of advice I received from a friend who married a year before me was...if they want to see/talk to you, they'll come and involve themselves in the celebration with you. Invite people to the dance floor, make your way to the cookie table, send shot-outs from the DJ. They'll come find you! You've waited your whole life to have fun at your wedding - so have fun!!! Most of your guests won't be petty about not spending a ton of time with you - they'll remember how they felt during their own celebration.

melleiatc · January 2012

We had about 200 people. We split up picture time and took pictures after the cememony and finished up after we ate (this cut down on the waiting time for our guests because we did not want to have alcohol and spend an extra 1000 just for 3 snacks for 30 minutes.) The only problem is that I expected to talk to everyone after cake cutting but most people got their cake and left. The place was empty within 20 minutes just when we were starting to walk around again (only 1 hr into reception ~730pm). I feel bad but then again I wished they would of stayed for the DJ and dancing too. Make sure your photographer reminds you to turn and take pictures of people you are talking to... I have no pictures of our guests at the reception unless they stayed for dancing after the cake. =(

gedert014 · January 2012

Thanks for all the insight girls!

How much time to spend with each guest?

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