I'm so frustrated- I can barely concentrate (please feel free to skip this post)
Arg...
I have a friend who has PPD (who has really actually probably battled depression for most or her life)- who is really stuggling. I'm friends with her H too...and he's SUPER defensive about the possbility of anti-depressants or "drugs", as he likes to call them. ::sigh::
It seems like he doesn't believe in depression, PPD...or the fact that it's chemical. He told me point blank, "My wife doesn't have a chemical imablances..." that it's just the stress of running a household. I told him that MANY new mothers are able to run a household without having suicidal thoughts.
I absolutely think she needs to go to the doctor. What do you ladies think?
Also- do you know of other treatments for PPD that work well- other then "drugs?"
P.S. I freaking love my "drugs"- they have changed my life and I don't think there is any shame in taking them.
I'm so bummed and frustrated....and why is there such a stigma on "drugs"...they are life saving people...life saving. ::sigh:: If they don't LITERALLY save people's lives (which they do)- they certainly give people back a happy and functioning life.
Even one suicidal thought is enough... even one. Please love yourself to get help...or let us love you enough to get you help.
::sigh::
Re: I'm so frustrated- I can barely concentrate (please feel free to skip this post)
What does she think about getting help?
I've BEGGED her to consult someone else in her "community"...her parents, her priest, her friends.
I'm feeling like this will drive a wedge between me and her H, because I feel VERY passionately about this topic. In fact- I had someone 5150'd in high school after he wrote me a suicide note.
Has she talked to her OB about it? That is what I would encourage her to do, WITHOUT her effing husband. Her OB will point her in the right direction. There could also be local support groups in her area.
Maybe try this resource: http://www.postpartum.net/Get-Help/Support-Resources-Map-Area-Coordinators.aspx
I will be thinking good thoughts for your friend.
Motolyn's House Remodel Blog Starting anew Nov. 2012.
I'd maybe recommend her seeing a therapist for the ":stress" as he put it and then the therapist will help her deal with her thoughts and refer her either to her OBGYN or a Physiatrist to get the drugs she may need.
[QUOTE]PPD is no effing joke. I did not have it but DH and I talked about it extensively before I gave birth so that he would know the warning signs. We'll be talking about it again shortly. Has she talked to her OB about it? That is what I would encourage her to do, WITHOUT her effing husband. Her OB will point her in the right direction. There could also be local support groups in her area. Maybe try this resource: <a href="http://www.postpartum.net/Get-Help/Support-Resources-Map-Area-Coordinators.aspx" rel="nofollow">http://www.postpartum.net/Get-Help/Support-Resources-Map-Area-Coordinators.aspx</a> I will be thinking good thoughts for your friend.
Posted by TheMutleys[/QUOTE]
Mutley- this is a good idea. Thank you. They just moved- so she doesn't have a OB and they are uberly "crunchy"- but this made me think that maybe we can call local midwives and get advice...maybe they can point us to a good doctor.
Thanks, Mutley. I know you and I have our differences, but I really appreciate this advice.
I do think that if they recently moved, it will also be helpful for her to find local moms groups. Local hospitals generally have new mom support groups and you don't have to have given birth there. Ours is run by a crunchy lactation consultant.
It IS exceedingly overwhelming to have a new baby and if you add moving to a new area on top of that, it is almost like a perfect storm for a lack of support and feeling like you are all alone.
How many months post-partum is she? When did they move?
They moved about two-three months ago- and she's about 5 months post-partum, but she's been depressed before. She keeps telling me she "dealt with it on her own" when she was younger...but I don't think anyone should try to handle it on their own- and she's not on her own anymore. She was a 21 month old and a 5 month old...
and I guess a big issue is that...she's afraid she might be pregnant again.
(They are super religious and don't believe in birth control- and the rhythm method isn't really working because she's post-partum.)
I asked her if I could research for her.
She's terrified of doctor's and "drugs"- if I was her H...I would go to the doctors alone until I found one that I thought my wife would tolerate, but I guess I just have very different opinions.
I think that even if I came in and cleaned and cooked...and took care of her babies- I still think she would feel down. I think it's total PPD...
And what's worse- is because she's battled depression in the past- I'm afraid she doesn't think she's good enough to get the best care possible. Does that make sense?
I've tried to tell her that depending so heavily on her H isn't fair...I'm trying any reasoning for her to seek care outside of her H.
I ditto CCO on finding a therapist. Even without medication, therapy can be helpful.
Thanks, Desert-
I've been calling some midwives and they have given me great leads on alternative supplements and they even found me a counselor that used to be a minister- which would be perfect for them!
They had some awesome advice- and one of them has been to over 700 births!
I'm really hoping that she'll speak to this midwife so that she can get the support she needs.
Thanks for helping me come up with what to do!