Need input for weekend wedding plan!

Re: Need input for weekend wedding plan!

• sister2groom

  

  November 2010

  You think Saturday night wedding would be more stressful, for whom? Most of your guests will have to work Monday and most will also have to fly home. Going from a wedding, to the airpor to fly home THAT night, then to work mere hours later I would try to do for someone I really loved, but would definitely wipe out any relaxation from the trip. And even then, I would have to leave the wedding early.
  
  Also, since the wedding is such an inconvenient time, I would make RSVPing for Saturday's festivities separate from the wedding, some people may not be able to take OFF Monday and leave early for the airport Friday.
  
  I completely get wanting to have a big party weekend, so have the reception Sunday morning/afternoon and then the guests who are able can hang out after.
  

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• redheadfsu member

  

  November 2010 edited November 2010

   I know you have good intentions, but...
  
  1. if you make it a weekend long event. Then you need to host the entire weekend (provide food and entertainment for whenever it starts to whenever it ends)
  
  2. Sunday weddings are very inconvenient. Sunday wedding usually have a higher decline  rate than a Saturday wedding, so just be prepared for that. (I would have to decline for a Sunday wedding with any travel time, as I have to be at work at 8am on Monday)
  
  3. Don't get your feelings hurt if many of your guests just appear for part of this "weekend long wedding." You need to not get your feelings hurt if some of your guests can't/don't want to attend the entire thing.
  
  4. Offer the guest houses as an option, but don't make people get them. Some people may still just get a hotel.
  
  5. This might be an logistical nightmare. What if none of your guests want the guest houses? Remember you only get RSVPs a few weeks before the wedding. Forcing people to commit to renting one of these months before is rude.
  

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• trix1223 member

  

  November 2010 edited November 2010

  I'm going to rain on your parade also, but I think you're overestimating how much time people will want to give to your wedding.
  
  By planning your weddingto end on a Sunday night, you're actually turning it into a 4 day event, because those who have to fly home will have to take the day off from work on Monday.  I can't imagine flying home on a red eye and then going in to work the next day.
  
  I would decline such a wedding, to be honest.  You'd be asking me to give up Friday to travel TO your wedding, then have "activities" all day Saturday, and all day Sunday, and finally get married late Sunday night, only to rush away from the wedding and travel home. 
  
  That doesn't sound like fun to me, and actually makes your wedding the most anticlimactic part of the weekend.  It actually makes your wedding into an afterthought.
  
  Have your wedding early on Saturday afternoon.  Have an afternoon/early evening reception.  Then have a kicking afterparty for those who want to continue the party.
  
  Host a brunch the next morning, and then let everyone travel back home with happy memories of a fun couple of days.
  
  Finally, I don't think you realize how 1)  keyed up you're going to be on the weekend of your wedding, and 2) how exhausted you'll be when it's finally over.
  
  If you hold to your proposal, when you finally get to the wedding part, I fear you're going to be so tired that you won't enjoy it.
  
  ETA:  The fact that your wedding is almost 3 years away doesn't change my mind.  And it doesn't mean that people will like it any better 3 years from now than they do now.  Your expectations will still be too high in 3 years.
  
  I think you mean well, but I think it's a bad plan.  Sorry

  "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146

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• trix1223 member

  

  November 2010

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_need-input-weekend-wedding-plan?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:472922a3-e826-4d12-9f3b-7af7bfc0bd1cPost:197e6892-d809-4177-af3f-a089f5c49325">Need input for weekend wedding plan!</a>:
  [QUOTE]I just got engaged and I've been giving a lot of thought to what I want from our wedding and what I want my wedding to be for the people we invite.  Background : First of all, a little over half of our guests will have to travel, most of them by plane. I hate that a wedding means flying in Friday night, going to the wedding Saturday, and flying home the next day. Guest only really spend time with the people they came with and the bride and groom only really get 4 hours to talk to everyone invited. To me it's more stressful than anything.  I want people to get a chance to relax and enjoy themselves, and I want time to spend with the people I feel are important enough to invite to my wedding. Long intro, sorry, but here's my idea :  I want a weekend long wedding, a full Saturday and Sunday with my guests. Guests would come in Friday night/Saturday morning and meet at the nearby lake for a day of "family reunion" style relaxing and fun. Swimming, hiking, boating, fishing, games... just hangout with family and friends. We'd grill out for dinner which would also serve as our rehearsal dinner. There are very large houses that can be rented (the one I'm looking to rent sleeps 30) and we could cover most if not all of the lodging expenses for most of the guests who don't mind sharing accommodation. We would sell it to our guests as a mini vacation. Then comes the taboo : The wedding would be on Sunday (ending around 9). This way those that are planning to drive home have time to get a reasonable nights rest before work Monday (I know some people just can not take off work but I would love if people could stay and enjoy the last night) and everyone else can go back to the lake and either hang out or party up with an after party. I realize this means that everyone who has to fly either has to catch a late flight or take off work Monday but I suspect that the people who I am expecting to come will come whenever we do it.  I know this is long, ( sorry ) but I wanted input from other brides!!! Has anyone been to a wedding like this? Do you think the Saturday activities will make up for having the wedding on Sunday? In order for us to have the money for the lake house and Saturday's activities we will need to have the discounts from a Sunday wedding. I am planning to talk it over with as many people as possible over the upcoming holidays to get an idea of how people feel. Also, we are getting married May 2013 so I think 2 years notice is enough time to get people used to the idea. What do you think???
  Posted by AstridRose[/QUOTE]

  "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146

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• aerinpegadrak member

  

  November 2010

  Full wedding weekends are pretty common, but they usually go like this:
  
  Friday: Rehearsal, rehearsal/welcome dinner
  Saturday: Wedding stuff.  If the wedding is in the morning or late evening, you can host an additional meal that day (we had a 7:30pm ceremony, so we hosted lunch as well)
  Sunday: Post-wedding brunch.  Everyone heads home after that.
  
  And yes, everything needs to be hosted.  Another Knottie was invited to a full weekend of wedding events, none of which other than the reception were paid for by the couple.  She declined to attend, and so did most of the other guests. 
  
  Even without the other events of the weekend, a Sunday evening wedding is not likely to be well-attended.  In most jobs, Friday is much easier to get off than Monday, so if you can't afford a Saturday (and with three years to save, I can't see why not), you could do the wedding on Friday evening and have a weekend's worth of post-wedding events.

  This is a neglected planning bio.
  This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.
  
  
  Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284

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• Summer2011Bride member

  

  November 2010

  It is a nice idea, but I don't think the Sunday evening wedding works for those who work Monday. I'm a teacher, and we really don't get time off except if we're sick. I would not call in "sick" and risk losing my job if they found out it was a lie. Others might be in this situation. I would suggest the rehearsal on Friday. You can invite everyone if you want to get the "whole weekend" feel, but know that many who have to travel will probably decline.
  
  Then have the wedding Saturday like normal. If you can't afford the Sat. wedding with the guest house, I would say scrap it and find a block of rooms at a nearby hotel that they can get at a discounted rate with no charge to you. Then for those who can/will stick around, have a big brunch or BBQ on Sunday morning that is more relaxed and you can just mingle with guests. Those who have to leave, can at any point in time. Whereas with a wedding, many would find it rude to duck out super early, but this way it is more open.
  

  
  
  
  
  

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