I have had so much trouble with catering and would love some of your brilliant advice.
Over the summer I sent proposal requests to 6 caterers that are on the approved list of caterers for our venue. I got back very different proposals from each of them. Some charged for cake cutting & service, others didn't. Some had their own items for rental, some didn't. Some had elaborate menus, others were more modest.
All of them were over budget. One day my mom called & said that she felt like she wasn't doing enough to help with the wedding. I was so relieved because the catering was stressing me out, so I handed it off to her. That was in August or so. When I went home for Christmas, my parents still hadn't made a decision on a caterer. In fact, my mom pretty much dropped the ball and nothing more had been accomplished since when I first worked on it. So we sat down, my parents, FI and myself to work it out. My dad suggested that we email the caterers again, but this time with a specific list of what we wanted. This would remove all the variables and we could accurately compare the quotes. We all agreed that this was a great idea. So I did this yesterday and I've gotten back 2 proposals out of 6 and they are
even more expensive than the first round proposals that I received.
My FI thinks it was the way that I worded the email. Here's what my email said (keep in mind it's the 2nd email I've sent to each caterer):
Hi _____,
I'm wondering if you would mind changing the proposal a bit to include some items that we decided on. We would like a buffett meal for 150 people to include the following:
Hors D'oeuvre: Fresh fruit, cheese & crackers
Main Course: Chicken, a vegetarian option such as pasta
Side Dishes: potatoes,a vegetable such as green beans or asparagus, green salad, bread/rolls
Drinks: (No alcohol) Water, iced tea, soda, coffee, hot tea
Rentals: Linens, glassware & flatware not disposable
Cake service
Staffing
Please let me know as soon as you can so that we can make a decision this week or next.
Thank you for your flexibility.
My FI thinks I should have said something like this:
Hi ____,
I'm wondering if you would mind changing the proposal a bit to include some items that we decided on. We are on a tight budget and were wondering if you could help us meet it. Below is our wish list, and the amount we can spend. If there are any suggestions and changes that you could make to what we would like verses what we can afford we are all ears.
Max amount (including all collateral expenses): $$Your dollar amount here$$
Wish List: You items here
Location requirements: location requirements here.
Thank you. We will be awaiting your response.
So my questions are these:
- Should I send a third email to the caterers mentioning that we are on a tight budget and could they work within it?
- How much are you spending on catering (if you don't mind sharing)? Maybe what I think is expensive is actually reasonable?
- We are trying to cut costs in other places around the weddings, such as not allowing plus ones for singles, not allowing kids that we don't know or have a relationship with (like coworkers kids), not having liquor at the reception, not using a videographer or transportation. We are doing our own invitations and are using several cakes from costco instead of a big cake. Do you have any ideas on how to cut costs on catering or any other parts of the wedding?
Thanks in advance for any advice! We truly appreciate it!
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