I grew up in a modern orthodox community.
I was in a 3 1/2 year relationship that turned abusive that left me holding the bags.
I took a chance and went on Jdate and it happened after 3 months of countless dates that I finally went on that one date that turned into a whole day.
We both knew we are each others Besherit within a few weeks.
I am more cautious because i don't want to get hurt so I insisted on 1 year of dating whe we decided to get serious so that if he thought about proposing in the future he would know that I needed time.
My parents got engaged after 7 months and personally I couldnt see myself making this life changing decision in less then 2 years of dating someone but with him that rational went right out the window.
So I asked the girls :
how do they deal with people asking " so when is the wedding?" Ever since 3 months (march 2011) we have been asked that question. The first time she was so bold as to say we should get married 3 months after I move up to DC.
Other times it just been here or there. This past weekend I was asked 2 times and then Saturday Jordan was actually with me when we got the question. Last thing you expect around the Sukkah table eating the fruits of our hosts harvest ( from the farm and his front yard) was that question. It feels like people are being noisey.
They chided me becouse:
- I think ahead and Jordan and I had talked about the future
- we have talked about wedding plans as far as the feel goes and the abstract idea of it
- we know what kind of wedding we want
- Jordan has suggested a few venues that he scratched for one reson or another and I trust his judgement becouse he knows DC better
- I know my ring and that life altering question is coming soon ( my guess anywhere between Dec and June) and so do both sets of parents
- His dad handed me a check for Jordan's birthday to be put in the ring fund
- that i suggested to my parents that they save up now so they don't have to go into debt over a wedding while paying for life in general & 4 college educations
- We gave my parents a tentative Oct 2013 though it might be August
Right now every so often my dad mentions " you need to figure out who is going to marry you?"
But within that all Jordan lives day to day and enjoys life (when he at home with me and we do NOT discuss work at home)
I live week by week with tests back to back every 2 weeks, oral reports, and setting goals to complete the outline for the DANB exam. I have to pass it to work in Maryland. On the weekends we just want to stop the clock and just be togeather and do something.
Why are people so rude and nasty?