Bridesmaids gifts?

casserole27 · December 2011

So one of the last things I'm working on are my BM's... well everything.

I am paying for the dresses, shoes,cardigans, as well as matching umbrellas for the entire bridal party (we're likely to have bad weather). Do I really need to get them a present too?

I was originally planning on getting them each some cute charm bracelets engraved with a sweet saying on them. However now that I am adding things up I am already spending way more than I had planned for them.

Most weddings I have been involved with the wedding attendants had to pay for everything themselves so I wasn't sure if the procedure changed.
Is it alright if i don't get them a gift since I am paying for everything else?

Or do any of you have any better ideas for gifts that are less expensive?

meganb1977 · December 2011

I think most of the ladies here would suggest that anything your attendants might need on the wedding day isn't really a gift and they should still get a little something for the trouble they took to be there for you on your wedding day. It doesn't have to be anything expensive, you can even think of what they like and get a gift card to Starbucks for the coffee addict or a Godiva sampler for the chocaholic.

Spree0629 · December 2011

I personally believe (I am not a etiquette expert), that you are doing enough. This is not the typical sitution. You are buying all of the "stuff". Since they aren't spending any money, I think this is enough. Can they wear the shoes and cardigans again? Are they going to be getting hair and makeup as well?

kmac821 · December 2011

Agreed. I'm paying for all of our hair, makeup, manicures & pedicures for the whole bridal party (mom's included). So for the BMs I also got them a simple 3-pearl necklace and pearl earrings. They can wear them that day or not, it is up to them. I'm sure it isn't the 'norm' or correct etiquette wise, but also think about your BMs--mine have already told me how crazy they think it is--we also decided on a dress that was only $60!

Do what feels right, and I'm sure you'll know if your BMs are down with that or not.

Also as a sidebar--my FI got all of his men (and himself) personalized cufflinks. I think he'll get them something else, but theknot shop was having a great sale!

adrenalina19 · December 2011

wow- you are going above and beyond. i honestly don't think you need to get them anything else, but if you wanna get them a token of appreciation this is the perfect time. i just went to forever21 yesterday and they had these huge 88-eyeshadow sets on sale for $7/each. i'm gonna stock up on things like this now, maybe something like that would work? take advantage of the holiday sales!! good luck!

blgrout · December 2011

I'm in a smiliar situation as far as buying my BM dresses, shoes, spa day before wedding, but I'm going to buy them each a necklace that suits their individual personality, and they can wear it on the wedding day or not, just like Kmac.
I think that if the shoes and cardigans are re-wearable then they are a suitable gift, and maybe that's not proper ettiquette, but I have a hard time with ettiquette sometimes.

em01092 · December 2011

Part of their uniform =/= "gift" in my opinion, even if they can wear the dress and shoes again. I agree that you are doing a lot for them, but that was your choice. It's very common and expected for BMs to pay for their own dress. I'd suggest getting them something small and inexpensive. Even a small photo album/a frame and some favorite photos of you would be sweet.

FutureMrsWright2012 · December 2011

I think that you're already doing quite a bit more than what is "typical". If you can't afford to spend more money on them, a personal card addressed to each of them would be a nice way to show your appreciation (without having to buy more "stuff").

quiggels219 · December 2011

I think things associated with the wedding aren't really gifts - like things they need the day of. I think it is amazing you are paying for everything but I think you should try and do something small with a nice card. The picture frame idea is great and you can send them all a pic of the day or just put a favorite pic of you two. There are sooooo many sales right now, I got my gifts 50% off at Macy's.

rlavach · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2012-weddings_bridesmaids-gifts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:05427f07-4ba2-44d6-9271-99a7af1ee5c0Discussion:dbdd89d0-2f09-403a-a2a4-a9b1377863e2Post:d6b8d8c5-deb5-4aca-9009-3363d41cab03">Re: Bridesmaids gifts?</a>:
[QUOTE]Part of their uniform =/= "gift" in my opinion, even if they can wear the dress and shoes again. I agree that you are doing a lot for them, but that was your choice. It's very common and expected for BMs to pay for their own dress. I'd suggest getting them something small and inexpensive. Even a small photo album/a frame and some favorite photos of you would be sweet.
Posted by em01092[/QUOTE]
Exactly.<div>
</div><div>You didn't have to pay for all those things for them. You chose to. You should try to still get them a little something. </div><div>
</div><div>Like the PP mentioned, a frame with pics of the two of you together would be nice. A gift card or even homemade baked goods (which are cheap, but time consuming). </div>

chickenbut143 · December 2011

If it were me, i'd probably still try to get them something (very) small, i like the suggestion from meganb. Maybe get their jewelry or pay for their hair/makeup (if you're doing that). I got my MOH (we only have 1 attendant each) a pandora bracelet & 2 charms last summer. I know its something she really wanted - and I wanted her to have it early (our wedding isn't until April). I also plan on getting her a charm & handwritten note of thanks at the Rehersal.

Good luck!

casserole27 · December 2011

Thanks so much everyone for your help!
I think the combination of paying for their outfits and a small thank you gift will make them more than happy.

Those are all better ideas then I have been thinking of! Haha
I like the idea of jewlery or something for their hair.
I bet I could even make something.

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