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Help with Tactfully "Breaking Up" with Baker

TheKingsQueen12TheKingsQueen12
in Wedding Cakes & Food Forum
We never officially booked this woman.  I have known her most of my life, her daughter and I grew up together (daughter is a BM...and making my life impossible), and she and my mother are very close friends.  She is incredibly overbearing and has tried to make this her wedding from Day 1.  I finally was able to break free of that by changing the venue.  Anywho, to the cake.

We showed her the cake we wanted.  2 months ago.

That's all that's been done.  She has never given me any flavor options, only asks me what I'm interested in.  She has started a new restaurant 1.5 hours from the wedding site and won't be able to be at the wedding.  The roads between the two places are very curvy and she drives like a maniac.  She won't quote me prices, she won't offer me any sort of information.

However- I messaged a girl my brother graduated high school with and asked her a few things and I have all the information I need to know I WANT HER.  She even includes a free 1 year anniversary top layer so you're not eating old cake =)

I've never been known for being tactful, or having a soft tongue.  I almost had her in tears when I told her we were changing venues.  For my mother's sake, I don't need to make a blow-up of this.  Help???
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Re: Help with Tactfully "Breaking Up" with Baker

  • jessicabessicajessicabessica member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    If you still want her to do the cake, tell her you want to have a contract negotiated by the end of the week (or whatever timeframe), or else you will need to start looking for someone else so you can get the details of the cake sorted out.  If she won't give you information and she just opened a new restaurant, maybe she's just not that into you either.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    If she's not able to attend the wedding what's the problem?  Just find another baker, you don't have to give her a reason and if she asks just make up some BS like "I just didn't want to add more stress to you with you just having opened the restaurant."  Do you really want to be worrying about her driving like a maniac with your cake in the back on your wedding day? I'll assume not!
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Just tell her that you appreciate all the information she has supplied but that you and your FI have decided to go with someone else.  You should not have to give any further of an explanation then that.

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  • JoanE2012JoanE2012 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_food-cakes_help-with-tactfully-breaking-up-with-baker?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:23Discussion:435afcaa-ddf5-4437-923e-a3cb300dbf5aPost:4df0c760-8d18-43c6-a224-0289b479ab5c">Re: Help with Tactfully "Breaking Up" with Baker</a>:
    [QUOTE]Just tell her that you appreciate all the information she has supplied but that you and your FI have decided to go with someone else.  <strong>You should not have to give any further of an explanation then that.
    </strong>Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

    This would be ok if the baker was a stranger and you wouldn't have any contact again.  But since the baker's daughter is a BM and the baker and bride's mom are close friends, it feels like it needs to have more of a reason.

    I agree with PP, just say you thought it would be too much for her with the new restaurant but thank her for all the work she's done and maybe mention how you'd love to have her do a cake for some other event in the future.
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