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Flower Girl/Ring Bearer Dilemma

lboerner88lboerner88 member
First Comment
in Minnesota-Minneapolis and St. Paul
Hello again!

I have another dilemma that I thought that I would throw at you guys. I currently have one flower girl for sure (already asked)! She is an adorable blondie with big blue eyes :)  

Now I am having a hard time finding a ring bearer. The only little boy about the right age is one of my cousins. He is absolutely adorable but he is kind of a little terror. He is a big momma's boy and I really don't think that there is any chance of getting him in a little tux and getting him to cooperate. SO....I have another little cousin that would also make an adorable flower girl. So I was debating either having one flower girl and one ring bearer, having two flower girls, or having all three. I just can't seem to make up my mind. What do you think?! Thanks!




Planning Bio - updated 04-02-11

Married Bio - updated 04-06-11
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Re: Flower Girl/Ring Bearer Dilemma

  • schmoodschmood member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are just having one flower girl - my neice and godchild.   We debated about having his nephew and godchild be the ring bearer, but decided he'd be too young (not quite 3)  Most of the time, the ring bearer is carrying fake rings and doesn't even stand up with the boys....he's really just there for the procession.   I would say just stick with the 1 or 2 flower girls and forget about the ring bearer....esp since it doesn't sound like he'd be cooperative.  Otherwise, you'll be worried the day of whether or not he's going to make a scene....just makes one less thing for you to worry about.
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  • leggwilliamsleggwilliams
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I'd say go with your gut. If you're only asking your cousin because you feel like you have to have a ring bearer, I say don't do it. We spent weeks trying to figure out who to ask to be our ring bearer (we don't really have any family or friends' kids that would be the right age) before we realized we really don't have to have one. We're having 3 flower girls and no ring bearer and that's totally fine IMO

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  • Bimbi284Bimbi284 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Ditto PPs!

    We are just having the one flower girl, and just couldn't decide on who to be the ring bearer. Not only that, but we aren't all that close with the families that have ring bearer age boys haha.
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  • graysquirrelgraysquirrel member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Like others said, don't try to fill the spots. We aren't having either for much the same reason. My cousin is a hell raiser and I don't want him spoiling anything. Go with the flower girl you already have and breathe easy.
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  • laura_fettlaura_fett member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think you should have a ring bearer just to fill in that spot. We have two ring bearers and no flower girl. I just wanted to have our two nephews in our wedding, we are close with both of them. If you think your cousin wouldn't be a good fit or your worried about it, then don't have one. If you think the other cousin would make a great additional flower girl, than have two! Completely up to you and FI.
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  • wittyschaffywittyschaffy member
    Combo Breaker First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We didn't have a ring bearer OR a flower girl!  It is totally up to you about who is in the wedding, if you don't know who you'd have as a ring bearer, then don't have one.  I doubt anyone will notice to be honest.
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  • tpender13tpender13 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You'll be happier without the ring-bearer, not having to stress about what the little boy is doing. We're not having either, just a best man and MOH. Partly because my sister would be upset if I didn't pick her kids, and my best friend would be upset if I didn't pick hers. Not having either means less stress, and it sounds like not having a ring-bearer will mean less stress for you.
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  • lboerner88lboerner88 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks for all of the advice :)
    I think I am going to stick to the two flower girls, and maybe as the time comes closer ask my cousin to be the ring bearer depending on his behavior closer to the date. 


    Planning Bio - updated 04-02-11

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