Honeymoon before the wedding??

Justin's Love · February 2010

How weird do you think it would be to go on the "honeymoon" a couple weeks before the wedding? Has anyone done this or known someone who has done this? Any advice to sway me one way or the other?

My reason for considering this is that I am applying to a grad program that starts the week after my wedding. It was bad planning on the wedding date, and it's too late to change it, as it's June 5th. I won't know if I'm accepted to the program until April and won't know summer dates of the program until late May. So it's either go before the wedding or plan an extremely last minute honeymoon for sometime after the wedding that fits into the grad program schedule.

Thanks for any advice!

cellarius · February 2010

i don't think it would be that weird. might actually relieve the stress of planning! in that situation i'd probably go for it

pandasquishy · February 2010

A honeymoon is a "vacation spent together by a newly wed couple." Since you won't be newly wed, sounds like you're planning a vacation, which I imagine might be good for pre-wedding stress relief, but it's not a honeymoon. You could always have a honeymoon during a break in grad school, lots of people don't go on their honeymoon's the day after the wedding.

kaesha · February 2010

Mmm. I think it's doable, though I found the time before the wedding pretty busy. You might be so stressed about the wedding, you might not be able to relax as much as you like.

I might be tempted to book a mini-moon for right after the wedding (go away for a few days) and then go somewhere big sometime in the next year. A honeymoon is all about a mindset anyway!

Justin's Love · February 2010

Panda, I do realize that it wouldn't technically be a honeymoon. That's why I put it in quotations in my post

This fact is the main thing that's steering us away from having it before the wedding.

I can't really decide if it would be stress relieving or if I wouldn't be able to relax if we went before the wedding. I have most things pretty well planned at this point, but I could see it going either way...

DanielleD7782 · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_honeymoon-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:11Discussion:e5aa0f97-c8f9-4697-b2d3-a53a07d7c2ffPost:5915af29-4941-427c-8aae-c92a1c9479eb">Re: Honeymoon before the wedding??</a>:
[QUOTE]A honeymoon is a "vacation spent together by a newly wed couple." Since you won't be newly wed, sounds like you're planning a vacation, which I imagine might be good for pre-wedding stress relief, but it's not a honeymoon. You could always have a honeymoon during a break in grad school, lots of people don't go on their honeymoon's the day after the wedding.
Posted by pandasquishy[/QUOTE]

Exactly. You wouldn't be taking a honeymoon since you aren't technically married.

SuMmErKuTiE · February 2010

Ditto pp's, it won't be your HM since you won't be married yet, plus you'll probably be really stressed out with all the last minute details you won't really be able to relax like you would after the wedding is overwith. I like Kaesha's suggestion of taking a mini-moon right after the wedding for a few days to get away as newlyweds, and then planning a bigger trip for when you have a break from school.

Justin's Love · February 2010

The problem is that a mini-moon wouldn't even be possible. We're getting married on a saturday night and the orientation starts that monday....

Justin's Love · February 2010

Another issue is that we'd like to take the honeymoon before my FI starts a new job, since he likely won't be able to get the time off once he starts. I guess this is what I get for trying to plan a wedding so soon after graduation....

alithebride · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_honeymoon-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:11Discussion:e5aa0f97-c8f9-4697-b2d3-a53a07d7c2ffPost:51ee0e6f-d893-42ea-88b6-1529e78c11d4">Re: Honeymoon before the wedding??</a>:
[QUOTE]I was so stressed in the month before my wedding there's now way I would have been able to take a week out and go away. I had huge to-do list! But if you plan hard and get the little things done early, the time will be there, but I don't know how relaxing it would be. I like kaesha's suggestion of a mini-moon right after the wedding, just a weekend away.
Posted by pandasquishy[/QUOTE]

Agreed! I NEVER would've been able to relax. The month or2 before was nuts.
And, jmo here, but a HM is a married couple's first trip together. If you're not married it's not a HM it's a pre-wedding trip. Maybe I'm old school about it but (no matter how far AFTER a wedding it might be) a HM is taken AFTER the wedding. If not-just a vacation.

mandybear7 · February 2010

Yeah, a girl on my club board is taking her "honeymoon" three months before her wedding. It struck me as kinda weird because she keeps insisting her honeymoon. It's technically not. If you want to go on vacation beforehand, go! If people ask at your wedding, just tell them you went on vacation before the wedding and you are starting school. Tons of people do not have a honeymoon at all, so it's not a big deal.

emilyinchile · February 2010

At 2 weeks from my wedding, I definitely don't want to be on a big vacation. I've planned ahead, and I'm not particularly stressed, but there are lots of things that just couldn't be done until the last minute - finalizing the guest list, final meetings and confirmations with vendors, etc.

I think taking a weekend get away somewhere like a month before your wedding and then taking a delayed honeymoon sometime during a grad school break might be the best option for you.

katncrack · February 2010

I think taking a trip before the wedding could be great relaxation except that a lot happens in the days leading up to the wedding so it would probably be better if it wasn't the week before. Perhaps not traditional, but the wedding is really unique to who you are. You should do what you want and what makes you happy. I have to remind myself of that also.

Scorpiogrrrrl · February 2010

I agree with the pp...its YOUR wedding, YOUR reception and YOUR honeymoon...take it when YOU feel like it! =0) Enjoy it! My FI will be doing his masters work while on our honeymoon on his laptop so I understand completely! Have fun! Do what works best for your FI and you..I think you already know what you want to do before we all offered our advice anyhow. =0)

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_honeymoon-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:11Discussion:e5aa0f97-c8f9-4697-b2d3-a53a07d7c2ffPost:51ee0e6f-d893-42ea-88b6-1529e78c11d4">Re: Honeymoon before the wedding??</a>:
[QUOTE]I was so stressed in the month before my wedding there's now way I would have been able to take a week out and go away. I had huge to-do list!
Posted by pandasquishy[/QUOTE]

That is what I'd be worried about. I'd be able to enjoy my vacation more without wedding stress.

Maybe plan a honeymoon for one of the school breaks?

golden1215 · February 2010

I had a friend do this; she and her fiance won a costume contest for halloween that was a week in Mexico, it ended up falling like 3 weeks before their Jan wedding. I guess I never thought to not consider it her HM since being engaged and being married are a LOT alike in today's world... esp if you already live together or have kids etc etc... now months before your wedding might be different, but weeks... I don't think so

She did look awesome and tan at her wedding!

And depending on your wedding/size you may or may not have a lot to do in the weeks before. I am having a smaller wedding and everything is already decided/booked/paid for... literally all I have to do besides sending my invites out in a few months is get my nails, hair and make up done the day of!

Honeymoon before the wedding??

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