Pre-wedding Parties
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Shower/gifts: more trouble than it's worth??? vent.

Hi ladies,

I'm new to this board, but I've posted quite a bit elsewhere. 

I am starting to feel really stressed about receiving gifts and having my shower.  My mom and MOH are throwing me a shower in a week and a half.  I have received one gift from a family friend who got it off my registry and had it sent to my apartment, so I opened it before I realized she would be at the shower, so I called her and asked if it was okay to open it, and it was, but she thought it would go to my mom's house.

The other day, my mom gave me a registry gift from my aunt, saying that she wanted me to open it now, rather than the shower, so Fi and I did.  I sent my aunt a thank you note and she calls me today very irritated saying "i'm so frustrated, i'm glad you like the gift but I told your mother to hold it there for the shower", so I said "i'm sorry,  I guess it was a misunderstanding but thank you" etc and I felt so bad about it!

I'm not blaming my mom or my aunt or anyone, because this all SHOULD NOT be a big deal but I really am so frustrated and OVER this whole planning process.  I know stress comes with the territory but its supposed to be fun and not confusing. and I am starting to go crazy.  Is anyone else having problems and miscommunications and stuff like this? I know things could be worse but  I really don't even want to deal with this anymore!

Thanks for reading :)
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Re: Shower/gifts: more trouble than it's worth??? vent.

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    edited December 2011
    I just saved the ones I got early and opened them at the shower, but I'm pretty sure that it doesn't matter when you get or open them, it is all going the same place. You are so good for sending a thank you note so promptly! You should congratulate yourself on that fact and just try to breathe through the rest of the drama. In my experience thus far, there are soooo many things that have to be communicated surrounding the wedding, some things just have to fall through the cracks.
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    That GalThat Gal member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks :) that makes me feel a lot better! This is all so crazy !
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    edited December 2011
    The miscommunication is not your fault. When I send a shower or wedding gift to the bride's house ahead of time, I expect her to open it, make sure everything is okay and send the thank you note so I know she received it. I wouldn't expect her to lug my gift to the shower. But if that's what your aunt and friend wanted, they should have marked the package - 'SAVE FOR SHOWER.' I think they are worried that the other guests will think they didn't buy gifts. So make sure you thank them again, when you are opening your other gifts at the shower.

    Don't let the small stuff get to you. Enjoy your shower.
                       
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    That GalThat Gal member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks! I like that perspective :)
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    That GalThat Gal member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_showergifts-trouble-its-worth-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:7643134b-f808-481d-97ed-431740eb1a9aPost:bea14220-5942-4361-ba80-8e01d06f7577">Re: Shower/gifts: more trouble than it's worth??? vent.</a>:
    [QUOTE]That was not a faux pas on your part. You had no way of knowing that it wasn't a wedding gift rather than a shower gift, and a bride is supposed to open the gift and send an immediate thank-you note. THEY breached etiquette with their criticism of you.
    Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

    thank you!
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