Hi Knotties-- I don't post a lot ( tho I do lurk, lol), and when I do it's generally long... unfortunately, this is no exception.
We were out for FI's birthday dinner Fri w/his dad and stepmother when she takes him outside just before hostess was going to bring out these awesome cupcakes I'd brought (from a potential wedding cake vendor--I'd wanted their opinions).
Anyway, nearly 1/2-hr later, they come back, she says 'we're leaving', really angry.
FI takes me into another room, tells me she just yelled at him all that time about how he hasn't visited his dad (he just worked 27 days straight, 4 a.m.-5 p.m.) and goes off on him for asking them for money (his father volunteered) for the honeymoon and how THEY didn't take one--THEY went right back to work after the weekend. In addition, she's angry about something that she perceived went wrong at Christmastime that she never vocalised THEN--and has built up anger about it all this time.
Needless to say after going back to the table & his father was in the restroom, she started up INSIDE the restaurant so I jumped in--sticking up for him, and she let loose on me, saying all sorts of mean and horrible (and untrue) things about me.
I walked out in tears doing everything in my power not to throw the rest of my dinner in her face. On my way out I saw his dad. Obviously he was concerned (he's very sweet), but I told him I never want to see that woman again--ever.
I mean it. I don't. I certainly don't want her at the wedding and neither does FI.
This poses immense problems all around (not to mention ruining FIs bday dinner!)
1. FI (& my future) family is (irrevocably, according to FI) broken. (FI said she never apologizes.) He said he/we will have to do things with his dad solo.
2. We don't have honeymoon $$, which means no honeymoon.
3. My father will be furious when he finds out, because he originally wanted us to do a destination wedding (so we'd have a chance to get away) but relented with a scaled-back ceremony/dinner party provided FI's family paid for the honeymoon.
4. With only 6-1/2 mos left we don't have TIME to re-plan, plus we have deposits on the venue and photog.
Not only that, if we got married abroad with just my parents and his mother then came back in time for what would've been our date at the original venue--we still can't afford to do both.
I'm feeling pretty despondent right now--so is FI. We've been miserable all weekend and don't know which way to go or what to do.
Any ideas or advice?