annoyed...

VJones1981 · October 2012

I am a bridesmaid in a good friends wedding April 26th. I am very excited, but it is also stressing me out. She has always been a little high maintenence and sometimes pretty dramatic. Wedding planning is really bringing those parts of her personality out more than ever. Yesterday, I got a text from her about getting together again to look at bridesmaid dresses. This will be the 4th or 5th time she has had us all get together to discuss or try on dresses. I will post the text she sent in a reply, so you ladies can read it and tell me what you think. I am posting this from my phone, so I can't break it in to paragraphs. Sorry if it's hard to read.

VJones1981 · October 2012

Thisis the text I got.....Hey ladies I sent an email earlier today asking which Sunday in nov would work for trying on dresses at Alfred Angelo in Lancaster, looking At the pics of the dress from David's I just wasn't that impressed I think we can find a much more flattering dress for the same price elsewhere. We are working with nov 4 or nov 11 lemme know. I need everyone to be there since we are ordering the dresses in early January in order to allow enough time for them to come in and u gals to get fitted once or twice if needed before the wedding. I understand schedules can be busy so I am sending this a month in advance. If u don't think u have the time right now or the money for being in the bridal party please let me know, I'm not going to be mad I understand its a huge commitment and can be expensive. I do need everyone there on whichever Sunday works beSt for everyone.....

Annas2013 · October 2012

That's rude. She does not have to have everyone there. It does not take that many trips to find a bridesmaid dress either.

turtleslove · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_annoyed?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:bad6618b-d6e2-454d-862f-5eb8be009807Post:e8200cff-4df8-4168-befd-037f0c12b0a5">Re: annoyed...</a>:
[QUOTE]That's rude. She does not have to have everyone there. It does not take that many trips to find a bridesmaid dress either.
Posted by Annas2013[/QUOTE]

Exactly^

Kinda reminds me of an old episode of SYTTD. The bride didn't want to decide on anything, she just wanted the attention and fun of trying on dresses and being the center of attention. You need a Monty! lol

MamaBear904 · October 2012

I think, by now, she could have definitely found a suitable dress. And unfortunately, there will never be a dress that is flattering to 100% of the BM 100% of the time. Everyone's body is different. 4 or 5 dress trips is rediculous.

That being said, I dont think there is anything wrong with the text she sent. She sent it 1 month in advance. She's asking everyone to be there which isn't necessary, but I know I'd prefer to be there to voice my opinion about a dress instead of it being blindly selected for me. She also acknowledges that its a big committment and not everyone may be able to afford it or committ.

You are valid for feeling frustrated with how many trips it has taken. Perhaps you can talk to her about that and remind her that its her day and no matter what dress is ultimately selected, all eyes will be on her, the bride. And if she's wanting something that will suit everyone, then she will need to be open to the idea of everyone wearing different cuts but maybe the same color of a dress.

Danny&Mel2003 · October 2012

I'm sorry but I don't see anything wrong with the text. A months notice is good. While I don't think you need all the bridesmaids there to each there own. It sounds like she wants everyone there to help pick a dress. I haven't started the bridesmaid dress shopping I'm waiting on MOH who may come into town I'm also considering letting girls pick there own and just saying color is coral.

VJones1981 · October 2012

Thanks for letting me vent ladies! I am planning on going to try on dresses again. In my friend's defense, she has not required all of us to go every time she has looked at dresses. I think I was more annoyed with the percieved tone of the text, and the fact that she told us that the decision was already made about which dress we would be wearing. I will wear whatever dress is selected and be happy to do so. And, while I know being a bridesmaid is a big commitment, I did not know I would be expected to go on multiple trips to different bridal shops. First for bridal gowns, now bridesmaid dresses. She tries to make every trip into a fun girl's day out. While I usually do enjoy myself, I have to take off of work every time.

MamaBear904 · October 2012

I can definitely see your frustrations and if I had to take off of work each time, I would definitely be a bit more peeved than usual. (my off time is very rare and precious).

At least she tries to make it more of a fun girl's day out.

samantha24p · October 2012

I can see where you'd be frustrated but I don't think she's being rude.

SSaltzman87 · October 2012

I agree with the overall text not being rude, but 4-5 trips is excessive. I also think she's cutting it kind of close by doing this, especially since she said a decision was already made. It's not fair of her to jerk you guys around.

melb2013 · October 2012

I don't like her line about asking if you can afford this committment or not. She should be working with your budget's regardless of how small that may be so that money is not an issue for any bridesmaid. Also, that many shopping trips is ridiculous and she doesn't need all of you to be there each time.

VJones1981 · October 2012

I wasn't really bothered by the text until it seemed like she was giving a way out by implying that it was going to be expensive. Oh well....I'm over it now that I got my frustrations out. Lol

Sharpschruter22 · October 2012

I'm confused. If the dress is already decided on, why do you have to go try more on?. What am I missing here?

VJones1981 · October 2012

She changed her mind. I think one of her very opinionated bridesmaids said something, but I'm not really sure. I'm just glad none of us ordered the other dress already.

annoyed...

Re: annoyed...

Choose Another Board

Search Boards