no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?

metalotaku · November 2012

so as the title reads. my boyfreind and i are engaged but i don't have a ring because well, i know exactly what i want. and no one makes anything close. an octopus ring. ok well they do, but my mom seems to think it's a bad idea for me to pick out a $20 silver engagement ring and it will make my so look bad. they don't make it in any other material. worse yet i can sculpt and a freind can cast, but only in bronze. and again no one seems to like the idea of me making my own engagment ring.

so instead because of all the hassel and greif, we are thinking about skipping the engagment ring. is this a regular done thing? or is this worse than getting a cute $20 ring that i like.

GoodLuckBear14 · November 2012

have you tried seeing if a jeweler can make it for you?

achiduck · November 2012

You and your FI are the only ones that need to be happy with it. But ditto GLB - call a few jewellers and see what they can do.

Chloeagh · November 2012

Would you be happier with no ring or the $20 ring you love? That's your answer. No one can tell you what kind of ring you are suppose to have. You are suppose to have the ring you love. I hate the stereotype that a ring has to be super expensive or it means your FI is less of a man, even if you would hate an expensive ring and you love your cheaper one. If you're worried about what people think, just don't tell them it only cost $20 (don't lie to them, but only a really rude person would actually ask what the ring cost).

I also don't see anything wrong with you making your own ring if that's the route you want to go, but I would involve your FI in it somehow.

metalotaku · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:8d725a6f-b3d3-407e-8cf3-ebe7d4964700">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]have you tried seeing if a jeweler can make it for you?
Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]
yes we have. all their casting services are out of state. and a wax carving won't surving shipping to their caster.

tiny speck · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:e52115a7-b45c-4b3e-ab0e-c16a7c96fc4e">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea? : yes we have. all their casting services are out of state. and a wax carving won't surving shipping to their caster.
Posted by metalotaku[/QUOTE]

I find it hard to believe that this is the case for all or even most independent jewellers in the Cincinnati area. How many have you approached? Or, if it's something you really want would you be willing to drive a few hours to another area to have it done?

In any case, no ring is obviously ok if that's your and your FI's choice, but it kind of sounds like you'd really like to have this ring. What about purchasing the silver one for now, and having a gold one made later?

AkiraDanna · November 2012

This is YOUR ring. If you want an octopus ring and you and your future husband are happy with that then go for it! It doesn't matter how much your ring costs, as long as it represents your love for each other and your uniqueness as a couple

I imagine you coul find a jeweler or some kind of specialty shop to help you design it!

kaos16 · November 2012

What is an octopus ring?

metalotaku · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:b25e4572-8a78-42f5-a652-6e313b04b811">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]What is an octopus ring?
Posted by kaos16[/QUOTE]
an octopus is a sea creature from the cephalopod family. it has 8 tentacles. and looks like this, <a href="http://static.ddmcdn.com/gif/willow/octopus-info1.gif" rel="nofollow">http://static.ddmcdn.com/gif/willow/octopus-info1.gif</a>

we looked at several local freelance jewelry places. 2 local ones that have the tools i won't use though. one i did work for him for a ring once and then sent it back to get it resized well he claimed i never gave it to him and kept my ring. the other one was my jewelry teacher from highschool, and his customer service sucks and he's very rude so i won't use him either. on top of that, his sculpting skills are very subpar. he usually makes his molds from other objects.

if you have in recomendations on jewelry stores in the area that might have casting services that are actually local, i'd love to hear some.

kaos16 · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:91888c2c-34a5-40ee-94d6-af8f18948229">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea? : an octopus is a sea creature from the cephalopod family. it has 8 tentacles. and looks like this, <a href="http://static.ddmcdn.com/gif/willow/octopus-info1.gif" rel="nofollow">http://static.ddmcdn.com/gif/willow/octopus-info1.gif</a> we looked at several local freelance jewelry places. 2 local ones that have the tools i won't use though. one i did work for him for a ring once and then sent it back to get it resized well he claimed i never gave it to him and kept my ring. the other one was my jewelry teacher from highschool, and his customer service sucks and he's very rude so i won't use him either. on top of that, his sculpting skills are very subpar. he usually makes his molds from other objects. if you have in recomendations on jewelry stores in the area that might have casting services that are actually local, i'd love to hear some.
Posted by metalotaku[/QUOTE]

I am quite familiar with what an octopus is. . . . . I was asking what an octopus ring was with the thought that it was a style of ring I was not familiar with. I am picturing a ring that looks like an octopus wrapped around your finger? I imagine that will be a large ring. Just a thought. . . . most woman will wear their engagement ring for the rest of their lives. An octopus ring seems a bit trendy. Is it something you see yourself wearing long term? It seems silly to waste the money to have something custom made that you will be offer in a short time. If you really want the octopus I would go with something inexpensive so that you can get a different ring in the future if your tastes evolve.

metalotaku · November 2012

I have no plans to change my engagment ring if i get one ever. and the octopus is my favorite animal. i plan to get one as a pet even. it's not something trendy or else i'd be able to find one. and i don't want a large ring hence why i need something custom, and since we've been looking for almost 6months now. it's getting down to no ring since we can only find silver or nothing.

kaos16 · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:0c9e1b8e-74af-40ae-aeae-07f4837e1df1">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]I have no plans to change my engagment ring if i get one ever. and the octopus is my favorite animal. i plan to get one as a pet even. it's not something trendy or else i'd be able to find one. and i don't want a large ring hence why i need something custom, and since we've been looking for almost 6months now. it's getting down to no ring since we can only find silver or nothing.
Posted by metalotaku[/QUOTE]

oh my

annmarie714 · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:e52115a7-b45c-4b3e-ab0e-c16a7c96fc4e">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea? : yes we have. all their casting services are out of state. and a wax carving won't surving shipping to their caster.
Posted by metalotaku[/QUOTE]

Diamond Cellar in Columbus/Dublin have in house jewelers who cast their own jewelry. I've gotten a completely custom peice from them and watched the entire process.

SachaBee · November 2012

I think it is perfectly fine:
1. To have no ring
2. To have a $20 silver ring you love
3. To use the silver ring temporarily while you look for someone to cast a custom one.
I also think it is a really, really cute idea for you to design/cast your own ring. I think you might treasure it even more if you have a hand in its creation, but that is just my opinion.
You can do any of the above. It is entirely up to you. I think you should probably get a ring though because it sounds like you do really want one.
Unfortunately I do not have any jeweller recommendations for you. Sorry!

metalotaku · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:140db530-4721-48f9-bb22-801e53e69814">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea? : Diamond Cellar in Columbus/Dublin have in house jewelers who cast their own jewelry. I've gotten a completely custom peice from them and watched the entire process.
Posted by annmarie714[/QUOTE]
thanks we are in c-bus all the time. i'll be shooting them a message.

metalotaku · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:54020c93-e67c-4e6f-b356-bf061aa3aad5">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think it is perfectly fine: 1. To have no ring 2. To have a $20 silver ring you love 3. To use the silver ring temporarily while you look for someone to cast a custom one. I also think it is a really, really cute idea for you to design/cast your own ring. I think you might treasure it even more if you have a hand in its creation, but that is just my opinion. You can do any of the above. It is entirely up to you. I think you should probably get a ring though because it sounds like you do really want one. Unfortunately I do not have any jeweller recommendations for you. Sorry!
Posted by SachaBee[/QUOTE]
i only want a ring if it's this because i'm not a huge fan of most rings. i'm weird. i hate diamonds. and dislike most stones. and getting a plain band for a wedding and engagement ring seemed weird, to both of us. and worse to get an engagment ring i'd never wear. i'd feel bad then.

and i'm lucky enough to be able to sculpt or else even if i find someone to make it it'd be hard if i didn't have a representation. <a href="http://metal-otaku.deviantart.com/gallery/25637600" rel="nofollow">http://metal-otaku.deviantart.com/gallery/25637600</a> and mostly what i sculpt is tiny octos <a href="http://metal-otaku.deviantart.com/art/tiny-octo-key-200375581?q=gallery%3Ametal-otaku%2F34308610&qo=34" rel="nofollow">http://metal-otaku.deviantart.com/art/tiny-octo-key-200375581?q=gallery%3Ametal-otaku%2F34308610&qo=34</a> <-smallest. the eyes are the tiny pin gears from a pocket watch. the head of the key is the size of a dime.

and thanks very much. we'll probably talk about the silver ring again, and just leave my mom out of the discussion.

StephJean83 · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:e52115a7-b45c-4b3e-ab0e-c16a7c96fc4e">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea? : yes we have. all their casting services are out of state. and a wax carving won't surving shipping to their caster.
Posted by metalotaku[/QUOTE]

I had my ring custom made. We met with our jeweler, my FH gave his price range for what he was willing to spend, showed them the style ring we wanted as we also have my wedding band style in mind. They drew up a couple sketches, we went in and looked over them, my FH had a few changes he wanted to have done, so they redid the sketches, we approved the sketch. They cast the ring in wax and when we went in to approve the wax, we also selected the center stone diamond and they sent the wax off to be casted in the white gold and have my diamonds set. They don't send out of state for the casting but it is all sent out from the store. Yes the wax mark up is very delicate BUT a good jeweler will be able to properly handle the shipping of the wax mark up from the casting place to the store and back.

She showed us a sketch they did for someone based soley on a picture the couple had of the ring(the wife lost her wedding ring and the husband had them make a new one identical to it) that they did over email/fax/phone and she never meet the couple in person. There are options and if you have a Jareds or Kays? They are owned by the same parent company and usually have in house(or local) places that do all the casting of their custom work.

SachaBee · November 2012

I think your octopi are cute! I have to admit I am biased in favour of the octopus ring. My little sister LOVES octopi so we had them all over the house growing up. I say go for it. Your parents will always be more traditional, but hopefully she won't care when she sees how happy it will make you.

1mobags · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:ebcdc292-4af5-4274-ad62-12aefba1eaf5">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]You should get the ring you want. Like GLB says, a jeweler might be able to make it for you. If you want the $20 ring, that's totally fine too, as is not having a ring at all. Don't spend a bunch of money on a ring you don't want. And if you want to sculpt your own ring, go for it. Nothing wrong with that. One small note on not having one: when you tell people you're engaged, the first thing they'll ask is to see the ring. That's not to say you need to have one, but you'll spend a lot of time explaining why you don't in the first few weeks.
Posted by kwitherington[/QUOTE]

Truth. We booked our venue on July 29, I got my dress on aug 4 and not one single person believed me when I said we were getting married until I had my diamond on aug. 12...... Oddly enough everyone congradulated him when he told them even when he said he still had to buy the ring but not one single person did for me..... Girls can suck sometimes.

I say get the ring you want when you want because only you and he matter. Congrats!!!!!!

metalotaku · November 2012

thanks everyone for the suggestions!

mandi195 · November 2012

Could you purchase the $20 ring that you love, and have that be sent by the jeweler to their casting people, since it WILL withstand the shipping, where the wax would not? Then they can re-create your ring in whatever metal you like. Just a thought...

arendiva · November 2012

I did a quick search for" octopus ring gold" and immediately found a few results for otopus rings with precious metals. http://www.etsy.com/listing/64260008/14kt-yellow-gold-octopus-ring-wruby-eyes

slunder · November 2012

Girls tend to put a lot of value on the ring (and other elements as I've realized....holy smoke's some people can be down right rude when commenting on discussion boards!) At the end of the day, do what makes you happy! No two people, relationships, or wedding ceremonies are alike, and you certainly can't please everybody!:)
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_no-engagement-ring-at-all-good-or-bad-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:122845d2-77dc-43d9-b838-1fe3ed5b96f3Post:9dc368b3-a6c4-4809-be82-3bea741d2627">Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: no engagement ring at all good or bad idea? : Truth. We booked our venue on July 29, I got my dress on aug 4 and not one single person believed me when I said we were getting married until I had my diamond on aug. 12...... Oddly enough everyone congradulated him when he told them even when he said he still had to buy the ring but not one single person did for me..... Girls can suck sometimes. I say get the ring you want when you want because only you and he matter. Congrats!!!!!!
Posted by 1mobags[/QUOTE]

RamonaFlowers · November 2012

Maybe I'm too submerged in nerd culture, but octopus jewelry just doesn't strike me as something that's really all that hard to find. A simple Google search of "octopus ring" got me several results.

Also, if you want to further expand your possibilities with Google or Etsy, try searching for a "Cthulhu" ring. No, Cthulhu is not an actual octopus, but the octopus tends to come up a LOT when searching for Cthulhu paraphernalia

no engagement ring at all good or bad idea?

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