Head table?

bananas1309 · April 2012

So I'm confused on how to set up our head table...

My fiance was the best man at a wedding once. He sat at the head table and I was placed at the back table by the door. I did not know anyone except the bride and groom at this wedding, so it was super awkward sitting by myself at this back table with a bunch of strangers. I told myself I would never do this to my wedding party's dates.

So, now I'm wondering how to set this up: we have 5 bridesmaids and 5 groomsmen, so having their dates at the head table would be 22 people!! We were thinking of doing a sweetheart table, then having round tables for our wedding party + dates kind of surrounding us.

What do you think? What other ways have you seen this done?

ThankfulSnail · April 2012

We are planning on doing what you mentioned in your post- a sweetheart table for us, then a couple of round tables for our WP and their dates.

Another option would be a King's Table, where you and your FI sit at the head and your WP and their dates are along the sides of a big, rectangular table.

I've seen head tables with almost as many as 22 people before and it worked ok with a really long table, so if one of you has your heart set on that and your venue could accommodate, you could always do BP and dates at the head table.

lyndausvi · April 2012

I didn't see a need to keep the WP members all at one table. So they sat with people they would have sat with if they were 'normal' guests. My WP siblings (and SO) sat with my parents. DH's WP siblings with his mom. WP friends sat with other friends. They were all over the room.

Personally, I wasn't fond of the idea of just the 2 of us at a table alone. It just seems, IDK? Anti-social to us. But we are ones who sit at bars at restaurants, not at a table just the 2 of us, so there's that. We sat with other people.

Some people like the idea of just a table for the couple. That's cool too. Or some people just sit with just their parents or their MOH and BM and their SOs.

There are a lot of options, but personally I think head tables are outdated.

mica178 · April 2012

We did the sweetheart table thing. The last time H was a BM, the B&G did the king's table thing, which was a relief. At that wedding, there were 7 BMs and 7 GMs, so with SOs, that was a very long king's table that split the room

Summer2011Bride · April 2012

I've seen huge head tables (usually one is put on risers and one is on the floor) and it's OK, but if you wanted something different, you two could always just sit at regular banquet tables with your WP and their dates. Doing it this way, you may have 2-3 tables near each other for all the WP, but that would be OK.

You could also sit the WP members/dates at regular tables mixed amongst the guests and you and H could sit at tables with your parents and siblings.

HockeyFan4 · April 2012

We had a sweatheart table and sat our wp with whom we normally would have sat them with (family or friends)...they were spread out throughout the room and our table was mixed in with the other tables (not located all by itself).

To be honest I think my H and I were actually sitting at the sweatheart table for 15 mins total, while we scoffed down some food before we did table visits.

KelaRenee · April 2012

Some, but not all of our wedding party sat at our table with us. My best friend and her husband sat at a table with her dad and his parents (who came all the way from Britain to our wedding). His twin sister was one of my bm, but her husband sat with his family (she said he really wanted to sit with his family and she was fine being seperated, originally we'd had them together), and one of his gm sat with other college friends. But my sister, her bf, his brother, and his b's gf, plus one of his groomsmen and gm's wife sat with us. It worked out fine. The wedding party didn't sit down much anyway.

Meggiemuggins · April 2012

We had a head table for us and our WP (8 in total). The WP dates sat at a regular table, but it was one of the ones closest to the head table (my parents had the other really close table) so they were within shouting distance of their dates. I also put our JOP (a good friend of mine) a really special OOT friend and a vouple of other special people at the table with the WP's dates.

littleluckypenny · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_head-table-4?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:f2f02883-f553-4a8d-b3cb-9d6a54cbfbbdPost:936c69e4-4d05-4edf-a424-8a408a80a44f">Re: Head table?</a>:
[QUOTE] I didn't see a need to keep the WP members all at one table. So they sat with people they would have sat with if they were 'normal' guests.
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

This is exactly what we're doing.

Starqueg · April 2012

One thing my cousin did that I liked was have a sweetheart table, with food on it waiting for them. It was a buffet, so this way they didn't have to spend time on line but could be socializing instead.

neongreenbox · April 2012

I have been in a couple of weddings and personally for me I enjoyed being at a regular table with my date (bride and groom had a sweetheart table) much better than the times I was at a head table. For me, I felt akward at a head table only being able to talk to the people on either side of you and not really being able to carry on a coversation between others. Plus I found it kind of weird that there was no one across from me so I always felt like I was watching the rest of the room. So I suggest sweetheart for you and sitting the WP at other tables with their dates.

kw44932 · April 2012

We're doing a sweetheart table. Our siblings and their SO's will be sitting with the respective parents, and the rest of the bridal party (and dates) will sitting with other guests that they know.

I was at a wedding where FI was a GM and sat at the head table. I was seated with other "random" guests, none of us knew each other. It was very awkward. We were the last to get our food, and I got up to go to the bathroom and when I came back, a BM was sitting at my seat talking to someone she knew, with my plate of food in front of her. Awkward!

Marina007 · April 2012

We're just doing all "regular" tables. Instead of a sweetheart table or "head table", all tables with be regular rounds with 8-10 guests per table. FI and I will sit at a table with his parents, my parents, my maid of honor (she's single) and FI's Best Man and his girlfriend. Our other bridesmaids and groomsmen will be one table over, with their SOs and some other guests.

rebarobert2012 · April 2012

Either do sweetheart tables or find a way to fit yur wedding party's dates at the head table. It's rude to split up social units.

My fiance was in a friend's wedding, and the bride and groom did not include significant others at the head table. We were all seated alone, randomly, at the reception. Needless to say, the reception was not fun at all for me because I barely got to see my fiance at all. I thought it was so tacky that they seated us all alone.

bananas1309 · April 2012

Yeah we talked it over and we will not be having a head table. We like the idea of having a sweetheart table with our wedding party + dates at round tables close to us. I would never seat my WP's dates at random tables... I know first hand how much that sucks... Especially when you don't know anyone else except the bride and groom.

lgillespie79 · April 2012

I'm doing the exact same set up for the same reason! I think we'll have 20 people at our head table cause not everyone has dates, but we are doing a big tuscan table.

Head table?

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