Guest list

shanding4787 · May 2012

My fiancee and I are trying to get a somewhat accurate count on our guest list. We have a bunch of stragglers that I can't decide on. They are basically either neighbors of mine growing up (who I havent seen in years) or parents of friends of mine. Some of the parents I am still close with, others not so much. I feel kind of odd inviiting said friends but not their parents. Obviously I'd love for everyone to come, but we just can't afford that. How do I decide who makes the cut?

dumdumfroggie · May 2012

Why would you invite your friends' parents, unless you're close to them?

That makes no sense to me.

shanding4787 · May 2012

Well I was close to them at one point in my life...just not anymore. In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_guest-list-39?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:95725b31-93e1-474c-b0fd-8f9a6ee89d80Post:9f6bc7ce-9086-4e5d-8215-d593bfe7596a">Re: Guest list</a>:
[QUOTE]Why would you invite your friends' parents, unless you're close to them? That makes no sense to me.
Posted by dumdumfroggie[/QUOTE]

dmiller9274 · May 2012

If I got a wedding invite for someone I hadn't seen in years, and wasn't close with, I'd assume they were just inviting me because they wanted me to buy them a gift.

Maggie0829 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_guest-list-39?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:95725b31-93e1-474c-b0fd-8f9a6ee89d80Post:0c0280d0-6f76-4e9e-882f-bf4f4ce18a3a">Re: Guest list</a>:
[QUOTE]Well I was close to them at one point in my life...just not anymore. In Response to Re: Guest list :
Posted by shanding4787[/QUOTE]

This is your answer. If you are no longer close to them and haven't been in awhile then why invite them? Honestly, they probably aren't expecting an invite anyways.

Annas2013 · May 2012

If you aren't currently close to them, don't invite them. It's not a bad thing.

shanding4787 · May 2012

Even if they are still friends with and talk to my parents? That's where I'm finding it to be hard.I may not speak with them but my parents still do.

Maggie0829 · May 2012

Well then I would leave the decision up to your parents. If your parents would like to invite them then invite them. I honestly believe you are way over thinking this. If you have it in your budget to invite them then do it. The worse that can happen is that they will RSVP no.

egm900 · May 2012

I invited my friends, and the parents of three of my friends. I was really close to them at one point, and I still have in depth conversations with them when I see them. I figure I would like to see them and I know they welcome seeing me (I asked the friends before adding their parents to the list, one of their mother's was going to come sit in the Church balcony if she wasn't invited because she wanted to see me get married, but not impose), so why not. They were the last people that were added to the guest list however. I would make your key list, and keep in the back of your mind that you might want to invite them. It took time for me to realize who I really wanted to invite considering how many we could afford to invite.

abussen · May 2012

<div>What we did was took 200 invites and divided it by 4. </div><div>
</div><div>50 - Bride Picks</div><div>50 - Groom Picks</div><div>50 - Grooms Parents Pick</div><div>50 - Bride's Parents Pick</div><div>
</div><div>It ended up that my parents and his only wanted to invite around 45 each... so that helped my FI and I to invite more friends. </div><div>
</div><div>
</div>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_guest-list-39?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:95725b31-93e1-474c-b0fd-8f9a6ee89d80Post:0c58d581-a2c1-4e84-8c82-550a3b9225d4">Re: Guest list</a>:
[QUOTE]Even if they are still friends with and talk to my parents? That's where I'm finding it to be hard.I may not speak with them but my parents still do.
Posted by shanding4787[/QUOTE]

shanding4787 · May 2012

Thanks ladies!

lyndausvi · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_guest-list-39?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:95725b31-93e1-474c-b0fd-8f9a6ee89d80Post:0c58d581-a2c1-4e84-8c82-550a3b9225d4">Re: Guest list</a>:
[QUOTE]Even if they are still friends with and talk to my parents? That's where I'm finding it to be hard.I may not speak with them but my parents still do.
Posted by shanding4787[/QUOTE]

My parents paid for most of the wedding, so there's that. But it very common in their circle to invite each other to one other's kids weddings. My parents have traveled the country going to weddings, their friends traveled from far away to attend my wedding. No one thinks it gift grabby. While I don't talk to them directly we all know what's going on in each other's lives. IE. I ask my parents about their BFs even though I haven't seen them in a few years. They ask my parents about me, etc.

Assuming there is room in the budget (or venue) go with your gut. I would not exclude someone I'm close to for them, but if there is room, I would be inclined to extended an invite.

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