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May 2013 Weddings

Ring Bearer or Not..

My bridesmaid K has 2 little boys (1 is turning 4 at the end of the month, the other will be 2 in November). I love her boys to death & her as well, I want to have them as ring bearers but I'm not sure if I should. Will they want their mom if they're sitting with their dad during the ceremony? Is it a bad idea to have the boys included b/c K will have her hands full during the ceremony? For pictures.. I won't have them there the entire time, it would only be a few quick pictures... What should I do? Little ones who are included in wedding parties look so cute! I just don't want to cause stress on K dealing with her littles ones.

Re: Ring Bearer or Not..

  • FI's nephews are included in our wedding party- ages 4 and 7. FSIL is a BM and the boys will either sit with their dad or with FMIL/FFIL.
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  • Ring bearers are adorable and I always thought I'd have one....until it came time to plan my wedding. Our priest highly advised against it since young ones can be a distraction. I would be nervous about having someone in their terrible twos b/c ya just don't know what they will do. I think 4 yrs. old would be better than 2 if you pick one of them.
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  • I think this really depends on the age, and two and four years old seem to be a "I want the person I want, right now," stage. Our FG is FI's niece, and she will be almost three at the wedding. She is very independent and extremely bright, so I'm sure if we said, "Mommy and daddy have to stand up at the front while you get to sit with grandma and grandpa," she would understand what we were telling her, but that doesn't mean she won't care and be upset about it. But, like you, we really wanted her in the wedding, so she will walk down the aisle and do her thing and then be taken to another location by a babysitter. This was actually FMIL's idea, so I don't feel it's bridezilla-y. Could you do something like that? Presumably you wouldn't want your BM to worry about having to watch/take care of her children during the reception, either, so the babysitter could allow her to relax, enjoy herself, and have her darling children in the wedding. 
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  • Our RB (my nephew) will be 6 at the time, but he has a mild case of autism, so he's in the mindset of more like a 4 year old, but we are confident he can walk down the aisle with our FG (FI's niece, who will be 4 at the time). I'm not too worried about it. We would like for them to stand up there during the ceremony, since both of their moms will be up there. I don't mind if they want to stand with their mom's either, because as you said, I think it's cute to have little kids walk down the aisle and in a few pics. :)
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  • Yea as PPs said, I think it depends on the age and if that child acts his or her age. My son is our ring bearer and he'll be 4 when the wedding gets here. He'll be fine standing at the altar with FI and if he gets tired he can sit with my dad. If your bridesmaid has a plus one that her son is comfortable with sitting with, you should be okayy.
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  • We are not having little ones in our wedding.  It also made it an easy decision since kids are not invited.  We are having a 6pm ceremony...reception ending at 12 midnight. 

    We went to a wedding in July...11am ceremony and the flower girl (2 or 3 yrs old) cried down the aisle and wanted her Mom (who was the Matron of Honor).  The little florwer girl did not want to sit with her Dad.  So Dad had to get up and take the little flower girl out for a walk....missing the ceremony.
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