this is the code for the render ad
Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Chit Chat
Chit Chat
New Discussion

RSVP

thefuturemssandersthefuturemssanders member
First Comment
in Chit Chat
I am getting married in 3 weeks! My RSVP date has already passed. Everything is already set with the cater. What do I do about people who tell me they are coming but do not send in an RSVP card and people who just invite themselves. I don't want to make anyone made but we only have limited space (and money to feed people). I want to make it fair. Should I put a note in the program that the reception is by RSVP only? Should i have someone at the door taking names and if they are not on the RSVP list they have to wait till everyone who did RSVP gets thier food and if there is anything left the ones who did not RSVP can eat? Or how do I say anyone is welocme to stay for the reception but only those who sent thier RSVP are allowed to eat? 
HELP! 

Report Reply to Post

Re: RSVP

  • lazydayz2003lazydayz2003
    10 Comments
    I would contact them and tell them if they dont send back their RSVP card that you are assuming that they will not make it to the wedding. People should have the common courtesy especially since you paid for the postage.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • nrawlings26nrawlings26
    100 Comments
    sometimes you gotta be blunt with people. tell them i'm sorry you missed the rsvp date, i already told the food person how many people. also, this is the way i am not sorry about you but as far as the people that just invited themsleves i would tell them show up and i will personally kick you out.
    Report Reply
  • J&K10910J&K10910 member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    You should have contacted any people you did not receive an RSVP from before you gave numbers to the caterer.  I would contact your caterer and se eif you can't still make some changes.

    image
    Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
    Report Reply
  • Arayx2Arayx2 member
    Third Anniversary 100 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_rsvp-4?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:0fc990bc-6427-4192-b419-4d81dfd49426Post:55bbc755-63f5-4300-b793-dfe9f7cb730b">Re: RSVP</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>You should have contacted any people you did not receive an RSVP from</strong> before you gave numbers to the caterer.  I would contact your caterer and se eif you can't still make some changes.
    Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

    I think this is pretty standard advice. I have forgotten to send back 2 RSVP to weddings and both brides contacted me to see if I was attending. I felt way bad but it was an honest mistake.
    Pregnancy Ticker
    Report Reply
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Call the ones that did not return their RSVPs to get a definite answer from them. Let them know that the caterer needs a head count, now.

    To those that invite themselves: If you can't or don't want to accommodate them, tell them you were not able to invite everyone that you wanted because of a limited budget/space. I know that is hard because you don't want to hurt feelings, but there is no polite way to tell people they can't eat unless there is food left after the invited guests help themselves.
                       
    Report Reply
  • aegrishaegrish member
    1000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_rsvp-4?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:0fc990bc-6427-4192-b419-4d81dfd49426Post:11cd599f-30e4-4df5-9601-ae67f5b7b280">RSVP</a>:
    [QUOTE]I am getting married in 3 weeks! My RSVP date has already passed. Everything is already set with the cater. What do I do about people who tell me they are coming but do not send in an RSVP card and people who just invite themselves. I don't want to make anyone made but we only have limited space (and money to feed people). I want to make it fair. <strong>Should I put a note in the program that the reception is by RSVP only? Should i have someone at the door taking names and if they are not on the RSVP list they have to wait till everyone who did RSVP gets thier food and if there is anything left the ones who did not RSVP can eat? Or how do I say anyone is welocme to stay for the reception but only those who sent thier RSVP are allowed to eat?</strong>  HELP! 
    Posted by thefuturemssanders[/QUOTE]

    Please do not do any of the above!  Surely your caterer can work with you for your extra guests that forgot to RSVP.  Call the people you haven't heard from TODAY.  If people invited themselves and you are at your guest max, tell them you're very sorry but you have to stick to your budget and unfortunately cannot add them to your guest list.  It sucks but you have to be a grown up and tell them that if that's the truth.  Unless you've already told them them can come...but yes call the guests you haven't heard from and ask them.  It shouldn't be an issue at all the day of the wedding if you do that..
    TRUE LOVE *updated* imageTASTES AND TRAVELS
    Report Reply
  • thefuturemssandersthefuturemssanders member
    First Comment
    Thanks for all the advice. My biggest problem is that we can not afford to pay for anymore people to come to the reception. Even if we do call and see if they are coming we still CAN NOT accomadate them for food because of Money.  We did not expect to have this many people at the wedding. Im glad to know we are loved but we have just almost blown our budget.  The cater will add more food, we just dont have the money right now to pay for that extra food! 
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards