Parent & fiance issues.

Re: Parent & fiance issues.

• kmmssg mod

  

  November 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_parent-fiance-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:47a18641-f518-4271-8f6b-825f16c74883Post:26918141-0131-482c-bcb2-6553f3072618">Parent & fiance issues.</a>:
  [QUOTE]So currently my fiance and I live at my parents house so we can save up money for the wedding and a house. The issue lies with my fiance, I guess. He is unwilling to spend anytime downstairs (our room is upstairs) with them at all. While we do live here, I can't remember the last time he had a conversation at all with them. What could I do to facilitate this? I know my parents are not the easiest to get along with. They tick me off quite a bit pretty frequently, but they are family and I love them and in less than a year they are going to be his family too. 
  Posted by kfritz36[/QUOTE]<div>
  </div><div>Have you asked him why he will not spend time with them?  What has he said?
  
  </div>

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• 6fsn member

  

  November 2012

  Also, how much time do you expect?  If this is straining your relationship with your SO and your parents I'd move out. 

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• GBCK member

  

  November 2012

  define 'not the easiest to get along with'--what's his beef? and is it a legit beef?

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• kayla2536 member

  

  November 2012 edited November 2012

  I'm not expecting much time at all. But he'll get home from work (before me) and go upstairs to our room and even when I get home and eat dinner downstairs he doesn't want to stay down with me. He won't even sit and watch TV with my parents. 
  
  He doesn't want to spend time with them because my dad is insanely stubborn and is very arrogant. My mom is also a bit immature and irresponsible. All in all, they are a bit irritating and I'm the first to admit that. 
  
  Regardless, they will still be family. 

  
  

  At the same time, I guess things could be worse. My family could hate my fiance. He's met my entire family and everyone really likes him. My friends like him too. Just him not really liking my parents. My parents don't make much of an effort either with just about anything, they think everyone needs to cater to them. It is a 2 way street but it would still be nice to see him initiate something. 

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• 6fsn member

  

  November 2012

  So, he comes home and wants some alone time.  That I can understand.
  
  Where does he eat dinner?  Where do you?  Does he want to watch the shows they are watching?  How often do you watch without him?  I don't know.  I wouldn't want to spend that much time with my family or ILs either.
  
  I stand by the moving out thing.

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• GBCK member

  

  November 2012

  so, the 'cost' of you guys getting free rent is:

  1-the peace inyour relationship

  2-your peace of mind

  3-his peace of mind

  4-his future relationship w/ your parents?

  
  

  That's pretty expensive.

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• ReturnOfKuus member

  

  November 2012

  Why do you think he should have to eat dinner and watch TV every day with people he doesn't like very much?

  

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• thejucheidea member

  

  November 2012

  Your parents are probably having the same thing that my dad is experiencing now that my 23 year old sister and her 32 year old fiance are living with them because they couldn't make rent. He said that he's going to start living in his office in the house and using the window as his means of egress because he so abhors the fact that they got rid of the daughters and now one is back with a fiance who he doesn't like.
  
  Move out of your parents' house. You shouldn't give up harmony for the sake of a party. You're just going to burn bridges that you won't be able to find the supplies to build again.

  
  

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• kayla2536 member

  

  November 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_parent-fiance-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:47a18641-f518-4271-8f6b-825f16c74883Post:486bd41f-e029-45f5-81a2-398d3bb9928b">Re: Parent & fiance issues.</a>:
  [QUOTE]Why do you think he should have to eat dinner and watch TV every day with people he doesn't like very much?
  Posted by ReturnOfKuus[/QUOTE]
  
  <div>
  </div><div>Not what I said. Every so often it would be nice to sit down and have him eat dinner with my family. I don't even do it every night. </div><div>
  </div><div>The only reason we haven't moved out again is because my parents are so immature and irresponsible that my fiance and I are the only ones who take proper care of our dogs. Parents just feed them (much more than they need) and pet them. They believe they don't need to be walked because we have an invisible fence. </div>

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