Confused Bride and Need Help!

Re: Confused Bride and Need Help!

• Hilraythebride member

  

  February 2012

  1.  Traditionally the Groom does not see the Bride before the wedding.  Some people choose to do a "first look" when the groom sees the bride for the first time and use it as a photo op.  My FI and I have been living together for almost 3 years but we will be staying in seperate rooms the night before and not be seeing eachother until I walk down the aisle.  It all depends on what you want to do.

  
  

  2. The bride and BM do not HAVE to get their hair and makeup done, they can do it themselves if they want.  Usually th bride will get hers done and if she wants the BM to have theirs done she will pay for that as well.  People ususally have them come to the place you are getting ready like the bridal suite in the hotel or you can go to them.  We are going to them because its an additional 200$/hour for them to come to us.

  
  

  
  

  3.  They don't really have any duties other than getting the requested attire and showing up.  It is nice if they are able to go to dress fitting, throw you a b-party, just be there to be supportive but not necessary and you shouldn't get all butt-hurt if it doesn't happen.

  
  

  4.  People usually have their cocktail hour and HDs the first hour of the reception so everyone is able to mingle and wait for the bride and grooms big entrance.  The bride and groom as well as WP usually show up during this hour or right after because they are taking wedding pictures.  If you are serving alcohol is it usually a good idea to serve some type of HD or snack during the cocktail hour.

  "A wedding is a day, a marriage is a lifetime"

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• amandad18

  

  February 2012

  1) It's traditional for the bride/ groom not to see each other before the ceremony, but I think more and more people are skipping this tradition. My FI and I will see each other before the ceremony to take pictures, just because it works out a little better with our time line. When you see each other before the ceremony, it's generally refered to as doing a "first look", and something that you'd want your photographer there for

  
  

  2) Hair/ makeup can be done before you get to the venue or at the venue- I don't think there's any "rules" about that. Just depends if you want photos of getting ready.

  
  

  3) The BM/GM main job is to show up on your wedding day. They really aren't obligated to do more than that, but I think most do. The only thing I'm asking mine to do is to help set up our venue the day before and help take everything down the day after.

  
  

  4) Cocktail hour is traditionally right after the ceremony. It also gives the photographer a chance to take pictures of you/ your husband after the ceremony- Especially helpful if you aren't doing a first look.

  
  

  HTH!

  

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• JaxInBlue member

  

  February 2012

  1.) is the groom NOT supposed to see the bride until she walks down the aisle? basically does the bride stay in the bridal suite and the grooms/groomsmen have their own room until the ceremony?
  This is up to you.  Having special "first look" pictures with your groom or otherwise seeing each other before the ceremony is something that is becoming more popular.  You and your fiance should decide together if this is something you want to do.  You also have the option of having pictures done with your family and bridesmaids before the ceremony, waiting to see your fiance at the start of the ceremony, and finishing pictures together after.  You're photographer should be able to help you sort through your options.
  
  

  2.) when does the bride/bridesmaids do their hair and makeup? (at the place of the ceremony so the photographer can take pictures?
  Your bridesmaids do not need to have their hair and make up professionally done.  You gave give them the option, and let them decide, but if you want a specific style of hair and make up on everyone you need to pay for it (and it's not a gift - it becomes part of your wedding day look).  If you want to arrange for everyone to have this done, you might go to the salon or you might have stylists come to you.  Again, you should be able to talk to your vendors and find out what can be accomodated.  In our case, own venue did not have a place to get ready, so we went to the salon and took pictures of each oter.
  
  

  3.) What duties are bridesmaids/groomsmen supposed to have?
  There are only a small number of responsibilities for your bridal party - namely, wearing the required attire, being on time and sober (IMO) for the ceremony and participating in a reasonable number of photographs.  Your Maid of Honor and Best Man may help with a few additional things - holding your wedding rings and your bouquet, helping with the train of your dress/bustling, and maybe signing your marriage license if your state requires it.  Planning bridal showers, bachelor/bachelorette partys, helping with favors, programs, set up and all of the rest of wedding planning things are nice gestures if they offer but are by no means required.  You and your FI (and/or your wedding planner if you have one) take care of all of that.
  
  You do have a few responsibilities to your bridal party though.  You need to ask each of them privately and separately for their budget for wedding attire.  You should not exceed the lowest budget unless you can cover the difference or plan on paying for everything.  If you require specific shoes or jewelry, you should pay for those items, in my opinion, but you should at the very least make sure that the items you select fit your group's budget.
  
  4.) when do you have "cocktail hour and hors d'ovres?"
  This is something to talk with your reception venue about.  Typically, and this was true in our case, cocktails and hors d'ouevres are usually the first hour to hour-and-a-half of the reception, and are a way to provide for your guests while you finish pictures, sign any paperwork, etc.  We missed our cocktail hour entirely; by the time we finished pictures at the ceremony site, got my dress bustled and touched up hair/make up, etc., we arrived at our venue to be announced and go right into dinner.  Definitely be sure to have food available when you are serving alcohol. 
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• Lisa50 member

  

  February 2012

  Have you considered hiring a wedding planner?  He or she can help you bring the vision for your wedding to life.  Good luck!

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• nicolej518

  

  February 2012

  Just to note on the pictures while getting ready, you should also ask your venue what the earliest is that you would be able to get in to start getting ready. Some places I looked at before I decided on a destination wedding only allowed for you to have your suite up to 1 hour prior, which is not enough time for hair, makeup, and getting dressed (depending on what you are doing). 

  

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