Rehearsal Dinner/Grooms Cake??

shanay981 · February 2012

HI everyone!
I ahve a question regarding our rehearsal dinner...
My future MIL is planning the rehearsal dinner at a nice restaurant.. but I'm stuck on whether or not I should do the groom's cake at the rehearsal dinner to surprise my groom OR have it at the reception???
Part of the problem is my FI's cousin just recently got married (we were in the wedding), and they just had a "Best Wishes" cake for desert at her rehearsal dinner. I know my future MIL is going to want the same exact thing for ours...
I don't want to step on my future MIL's toes with the rehearsal dinner, but I would much prefer to do the groom's cake at the dinner reather than the reception. I ahve a really awesome idea for the cake, and definitely don't want to squash it just b/c it might upset her. How do I approach this?? Any suggestions?? ANybody else out there doing a groom's cake at the rehearsal or the reception?
Thanks to all!

Hilraythebride · February 2012

I would just let her know that you had an idea for the grooms cake and you were really hoping to present it at the RD. I am sure she will at least hear you out!

What is your idea?

Ash61612 · February 2012

I would just ask her and see if you two can come to a compromise. How many guests will be invited? Will 2 cakes be justified?

We are having the grooms cake at the rehearsal dinner. It is a surprise to FI. FMIL was completely fine with this.

DrPB2b13 · February 2012

Is your MIL someone you can talk to about it, and explain that you'd really like to do a fancy groom's cake to surprise FI? If she stalls and says she has to do the "best wishes" cake because it's tradition or something, then that'll tell you how she feels about it and you can have it at the reception. Otherwise, she might think it's a great idea

sleblanc72 · February 2012

Agreed with pp's. If this is something you can comfortably talk to FMIL about then I would go that way, both DrPB and Ash had great ways of how to go about it.

HarperBargo · February 2012

I agree with PP. I think a compromise is nice and 2 cakes or even 2 types of desserts can work.

We are doing 2 cakes at the RD both smaller and different. I am doing a groom's cake. It is a surprise for FI. My FFIL (FI's mom is no longer with us) is giving us money for the RD but told us to do what we would like. I did email him and told him my cake idea and he thought it was a good idea. The second cake is a token to our parents and for FFIL's b-day and my parents' anniversary.

Jo&Lo83 · February 2012

Well, this might not apply but for me - I wanted to do something "fun" for my groomscake - I have a friend who does like those wacky cakes that are in shapes and whatnot, and he will do one for free for me. But my reception site only allows for licensed bakers sooo...we have to do ours at the rehearsal dinner.

kelsey+brandon · February 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_rehearsal-dinnergrooms-cake?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:7f0583d6-038c-4ef6-a3dc-b560ef4ba863Post:f5619fc1-093c-434c-ad32-c253297cacc0">Re: Rehearsal Dinner/Grooms Cake??</a>:
[QUOTE]I would just ask her and see if you two can come to a compromise. How many guests will be invited? Will 2 cakes be justified? We are having the grooms cake at the rehearsal dinner. It is a surprise to FI. FMIL was completely fine with this.
Posted by Ash61612[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Ditto to all of this.

</div>

julianahenao881 · February 2012

agree^^^^^

littleluckypenny · February 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_rehearsal-dinnergrooms-cake?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:7f0583d6-038c-4ef6-a3dc-b560ef4ba863Post:b82a8c96-71b5-425a-8a56-bef40fb79445">Re: Rehearsal Dinner/Grooms Cake??</a>:
[QUOTE]I would just let her know that you had an idea for the grooms cake and you were really hoping to present it at the RD. I am sure she will at least hear you out! What is your idea?
Posted by Hilraythebride[/QUOTE]

This. All the best!

kimiandgary · February 2012

I didn't even think about having a cake at the rehearsal dinner. Ours turned into a rehearsal luncheon (schedule oops at the venue). The catering comes with cream puffs and I thought that would be enough. Do I need a cake too?!

I agree with PP about talking to the FMIL. Just make sure she knows you want it to be a surprise.

Cassandra999 · February 2012

kimi- I don't think you need a cake unless you want one.

I'm not doing a groom's cake. our wedding cake will be kind of out there so no need to do another one. We both don't like cake anyway.

doeie04 · February 2012

I think you should talk to FMIL and see what she says. If she really wants to do the best wishes cake, let her. Just do yours at the reception. I wouldn't upset my FMIL over cake. :P

I never thought about doing a grooms cake, but I saw these adorable Mario (nintendo) guys that he would love and I may do that for the RD.

LiLgEe · February 2012

i would do it at the rehearsal because the wedding day you will have a huge cake!!

shanay981 · February 2012

Thanks everyone for the great advice... seems everyone agrees... I will mention something to her this weekend (we are visiting the rehearsal dinner site on Saturday to book it)... I'm sure she iwll be fine iwth it, I just didn't know the right way to approach it and didn't want to step on her toes!.. SO thanks everyone!!

Good Luck to all!

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