How to handle

mancila60 · April 2012

Out of our whole wedding party only 1 of them is not in a relationship all the GM are married or engaged except the 1. All my BM's are married, engaged, or have been dating a while. I invited everyone with a guest being the person they were with except the single GM. So now I have my BM's texting me 1 saying her husband can't come can she bring a friend i know her, another broke up with her bf last week and wants to bring a guest, another her bf is having surgery that week and can't come. I found all that out this week. I really don't want these people at the rehearsal since I had to add people to that already but can I tell them they can't bring a guest at all or just specify just not to the rehearsal. Or can I tell them no guest unless it's the one on the invite? Help!!!

Cackle6 · April 2012

Since you already gave them a guest for the wedding and have probably factored that into your numbers at this point, I would let them bring a guest to the wedding. However, I think it's fine to ask them not to bring a random friend to the rehearsal. Just let them know while you're fine with them bringing a guest to the wedding, you'd like the rehearsal dinner to be a little more personal, and therefore would like it to be invited guests only.

mancila60 · April 2012

Maybe I should mention all invites had specific names not just so and so and guest. It was like Jane Doe and John Smith.

AurorasEnvy · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_how-to-handle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f92e907a-d6db-4388-b9c7-e7b08694e688Post:8f52596e-6481-4e99-a1cd-db1af4bddafb">Re: How to handle</a>:
[QUOTE]Since you already gave them a guest for the wedding and have probably factored that into your numbers at this point, I would let them bring a guest to the wedding. However, I think it's fine to ask them not to bring a random friend to the rehearsal. <strong>Just let them know while you're fine with them bringing a guest to the wedding, you'd like the rehearsal dinner to be a little more personal, and therefore would like it to be invited guests only.</strong>
Posted by Cackle6[/QUOTE]

<div>I like this idea. Are these guests that people are bringing going to know everyone else? I might casually steer the conversation to essentially say, "as a BM, you are going to have almost zero time to spend with this guest until the dancing starts at the reception, do you really want to drag someone along who isn't going to know anyone?" I've been the guest of the GM who doesn't know anyone, and it really sucks. I also might mention that some of the other WP aren't bringing guests - maybe they think they are going to be the only GM/BM without a date....</div>

toothpastechica · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_how-to-handle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f92e907a-d6db-4388-b9c7-e7b08694e688Post:9261b399-b1f2-4558-90b0-d2de1e79aaa2">Re: How to handle</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How to handle : I like this idea. Are these guests that people are bringing going to know everyone else? I might casually steer the conversation to essentially say, "as a BM, you are going to have almost zero time to spend with this guest until the dancing starts at the reception, do you really want to drag someone along who isn't going to know anyone?" I've been the guest of the GM who doesn't know anyone, and it really sucks. I also might mention that some of the other WP aren't bringing guests - maybe they think they are going to be the only GM/BM without a date....
Posted by AurorasEnvy[/QUOTE]

This is exactally what I would have said. If you let them know that not everyone got a guest invite in the bridal party and talk about the lack of time they might not want to anymore. I agree with FI was in his cousins weddings I was pretty bored for most of the day while either entertaining myself through pictures and getting ready or going with him but being bored while they all did pictures, got ready, and I sat bymyself in the ceremony etc.

Melissa51212 · April 2012

I agree wit pp try to steer them not to but in the end if the want to bring someone then let them...

mandi921vh · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_how-to-handle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f92e907a-d6db-4388-b9c7-e7b08694e688Post:2dc52560-c06b-401b-95b8-face1b6f3e50">Re:How to handle</a>:
[QUOTE]Maybe I should mention all invites had specific names not just so and so and guest. It was like Jane Doe and John Smith.
Posted by mancila60[/QUOTE]

<div>This is what I would say. You are only allowing people to bring their S/O (gf/bf/FI/spouse) and if he/she is unable to come that doesn't give them the right to bring a random person.</div><div>
</div><div>Yes you have budgeted to include that spouse, but you only have "room" for that spouse, not a random guest.</div>

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