Pre-wedding Parties

friend skipped my shower to drink at the bar

I have a friend (up until yesterday, would have considered her a close friend) who skipped my bridal shower yesterday (Sunday).  On Saturday, she was all excited about attending.  I'm bummed out because I know she was at the bar all afternoon.  It's bothering me - do I say something?  Do I wait for her to say something? 

Re: friend skipped my shower to drink at the bar

  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    If she told you she was going to be there then be a friend and ask if she's OK. Don't start a fight but see if there is anything wrong.
  • edited December 2011
    That sucks that she told you she was going to attend and then didn't show up, but you can't really dictate where she goes or what she spends her money on.  I would not bring it up.
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  • SuMmErKuTiESuMmErKuTiE member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Ditto Banana.. I would check in on her to make sure everything's ok.

    My cousin was all excited to be at my shower, and the morning of my shower she had severe abdominal pain and ended up in the ER and missed my shower. Things happen, and I was more concerned for her then wondering why she "skipped" my shower.

    I'm sorry your friend missed your shower, but definitely check in and make sure she's ok, and the story should come out as to why she wasn't there.
  • edited December 2011
    I'd be more concerned if she hadn't checked in at 2 different bars on Facebook while the shower was going on.

    Anyways, I went that route, text her and asked... "hey, didn't see you at the shower yesterday, is everything ok?" and she responded that she got drunk with her mom.

    Everyone has different priorities, I guess.
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_friend-skipped-shower-drink-bar?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:9325b203-af3a-4a6e-96a5-908c59ba6221Post:46950f09-7948-4821-b927-0435ec7969fd">Re: friend skipped my shower to drink at the bar</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'd be more concerned if she hadn't checked in at 2 different bars on Facebook while the shower was going on. Anyways, I went that route, text her and asked... "hey, didn't see you at the shower yesterday, is everything ok?" and she responded that she got drunk with her mom. Everyone has different priorities, I guess.
    Posted by stanggirl0220[/QUOTE]

    Wow, well now you know.  You did the right thing, OP.  You might want to think about re-evaluating that friendship in the future.
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_friend-skipped-shower-drink-bar?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:9325b203-af3a-4a6e-96a5-908c59ba6221Post:46950f09-7948-4821-b927-0435ec7969fd">Re: friend skipped my shower to drink at the bar</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'd be more concerned if she hadn't checked in at 2 different bars on Facebook while the shower was going on. Anyways, I went that route, text her and asked... "hey, didn't see you at the shower yesterday, is everything ok?" and she responded that she got drunk with her mom. Everyone has different priorities, I guess.
    Posted by stanggirl0220[/QUOTE]

    Wow, your "friend" sounds like a real peach.  That's really crappy, sorry this happened to you. 

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  • heytay89heytay89 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If this is something that really bothers you, and that you think will continue to bother you, I definitely think that you need to make sure she knows. Just tell her that you're hurt that she chose to go out drinking instead of coming to your shower like she said that she would. Obviously she doesn't value the friendship very much if she'd rather be getting drunk with her mom than spending time with you at your shower.
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