Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Flowers
Flowers
New Discussion

Who Pays for Flowers!....

AdaCarAdaCar
First Comment
in Flowers
Hi everyone,

I have a question regarding payment of flowers. My fiance's mom is convinced she only pays for the bridal bouquette and the groomsmen boutonnoirs, but I've only ever seen it done where the groom's parents pay the total price for the flowers. 

What is etiquette and how can I approach her respectfully if I disagree with her?

Thanks!
Report Reply to Post

Re: Who Pays for Flowers!....

  • PrimRoseMamaPrimRoseMama member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    I thought the traditional thing was for the Bride's family to pay for all items related to the ceremony and reception? The groom's family handles the rehearsal dinner. Though it is more common for the couple to foot the whole bill these days. I have never heard of the grooms family being responsible for flowers, period.
    ~* Matron of Honor *~

    Lilypie Second Birthday tickersLilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Report Reply
  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    I think the etiquette you are referencing is either regional, or very antiquated (ie from the 1950's and 1960's). I have been on the Knot for almost 3 years and have never seen a post about the groom's parents paying for flowers, although I do recall from many decades ago that this was an item the groom's parents paid for, along with the rehearsal dinner. I'm not saying it's not standard in some places, but it's not common. I'm 57, so that's why I might recall this.

    Without knowing how everyone involved in these decisions about who-pays-for-what has agreed or disagreed, it's not easy to provide advice. Most of the posts I see indicate the bride & groom are paying for the bulk of the wedding they want. If the parents are assisting, it's usually a set amount of money, not certain items or individual portions of a wedding.

    If I had the expectations you do, first I'd check on my local board to see what they say. If this is a regional thing, they'd know.  Then, I'd probably include my fiance in this discussion and determine what, as a couple, you can afford to pay for. Then, as a couple, I'd determine if the parents are contibuting a portion based on a PRIOR AGREEMENT TO DO SO, what that dollar amount would be, not what specific items that would be. An open ended agreement to pay for an item/part of the wedding, rather than a specific cash contribution leaves way too much to argue about.

    Good luck.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Wedding Website and Bio Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • kisskiss30kisskiss30
    First Comment
    edited September 2012
    Asking or reminding someone what their responsible for paying at a wedding can get al little touchy.  I don't know if I'd want to go there. 
    Report Reply
  • TheVirginiansTheVirginians member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited September 2012
    Your FMIL is partially correct. Traditionally the groom is responsible for groomsmen bouts and bridal bouquet. Add to that, however, corsages for both mom and grandmoms, and bouts for both dads. Notice that I wrote groom. If she doesn't offer to do what I have added, then your groom should cover those additions. How to approach her? Don't. Approach your FI.
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards