Wedding Recap and Withdrawal
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Had complaints about my venue. How do I politely convey this to them?

My wedding was Sunday. We had amazingly beautiful weather, and ended up having the ceremony outdoors. I was so happy! Everything seemed to go well until the reception.

Before the reception I had been e-mailing my venue's contact person (their on-site event coordinator) all the details--seating chart, etc. I had to send him a revised seating chart the week of the wedding. He did not use it! Our parents and other "VIPS" ended up sitting far away from the bridal table. What REALLY made me mad was that someone (I'm assuming it was the event coordinator) put new table numbers on the outside of my escort cards. When our guests arrived they were confused--the inside of the card had the correct table they were supposed to sit at (assigned by me) and the outside had an incorrect number. What baffles me is why they did this! Each table had the required minimum number of people sitting there. It was like someone at the venue decided at the last minute that they didn't like so-and-so sitting with each other, so they took the liberty of putting them where they pleased. NOT cool!

I spent hours working on the seating chart. Ours was especially difficult because we have family members who are on the outs with some people, and they did not want to be seated at the same table as these people.

Of course I noticed all of this at the reception, but did not want to confront the event coordinator because I did not want to make a scene, and I did not want to ruin our reception. Some guests assured me that I was the only one who noticed this, yet some guests told me later it was total confusion when they all went to sit down and noticed two numbers on their escort cards.

Also, yesterday my brother-in-law told me he saw the event coordinator interviewing two prospective clients (brides and grooms) within the hour before our wedding. There was much confusion on the part of our bridal party as to where they should be standing/moving, etc. in that hour before the ceremony started because of the last-minute change to have the wedding outdoors. I know people need to get new business, but I think the coordinator's priority in the hour before a wedding starts is to make sure they wedding they are currently runing is going smoothly.

I am going to write a vendor review of this establishment to tell future brides in my area about this. I want to complain to the venue about this too, in a "polite" way, if possible. Practically everything else went well--the food and wait staff were excellent. It's just that this event coordinator seemed to screw everything up.

I guess I am just venting at this point, but didn't know if anyone else had a similar problem and how they handled it after the fact. I am trying to remember only the fun, positive aspects of the day, but confusing our guess was not part of our plan!

Re: Had complaints about my venue. How do I politely convey this to them?

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    I also had some issues with my coordinator. Overall, everything went well, but she did a couple of things that irritated me. Mainly, it was the reception ending early. I was supposed to have the hall from 4:30-10:30 (that included the time guests could start arriving). But it rained on our wedding day, so we couldn't do a bubble exit outside of the church. Hence, instead of waiting around, the guests all went to the hall early. The coordinator let them in at 4, then changing the reception from 4-10 (6 hour rental). But she never told me this the entire night!! I only found out when the DJ came up to me at 9:50, saying he was going to play the last few songs!

    I never got around to writing to the hall coordinator, but I wish I would have. I say definitely write her an email, stating in detail the problem (you may want to wait a few days to write it if you're really fired up). GL! And congrats on your recent wedding!
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    Thanks, Kim. I'm sorry to hear you had to end your day early.

    I called the event planner today and complained to him. I started off by mentioning all the nice things about the venue and the day, and ended the conversation that way. But I said I wanted to point out one BIG problem, and I told him everything I stated above. He apologized, but... what good is it now?

    I met the owner of the venue (a small B&B) the night before and he was very nice. I think I will send a thank-you letter to him, pointing out all the wonderful parts of the day and the exceptional job that the chef and wait staff did, but also point out the escort card confusion and the fact that the event planner was interviewing 2 future brides and grooms within 1.5 hours of my ceremony. I just don't think that was fair to my husband and I and our families.
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    I don't normally post on this board but just happened to come by what you wrote. You should definately tell the owner about this. He may not have any idea of how the planner treated you. Congrats on the wedding!
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    We had quite a few issues with our venue. It was a DW and the next day I wrote out a list with my parents of what the venue/their coordinator messed up on/should have done better and we sat down with someone there and talked it over. We actually got our coordinator's fee back because she was so horrible! I feel like it really helped, especially future brides that will have their wedding there.

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    I feel like our event coordinator did a terrible job for us.  Alot of details were messed up, including our ceremony music which she assured me she would cue (CD) for us, but my #1 complaint is that she radiated annoyance.  I could have overlooked alot of errors if she had been the warm, friendly person I thought we were getting when we booked there.  Because of her attitude and rudeness, it made everything stressful and I'm still struggling almost 3 weeks later to think of my wedding with fondness.  She was rude and irritable and I didn't see a genuine smile out of her--and she was the same way at the rehearsal the night before.  If you don't like your job and your job is orchestrating weddings, PLEASE change jobs!!  A wedding is a big freakin deal and she put a black cloud over mine.  I'm hoping before too much longer, I'll be able to forget about her and just remember what was great about my day, but I'm furious that I even have to wish for that.  Sorry, I'm not really helping you, just venting and commiserating. :)  I would share with the owner.  I contacted the coordinator to complain (respectfully) after my event and her email back to me was just argumentative.  She even said she overheard my bridesmaids saying how difficult I was to please!  I KNOW I was not a bridezilla, but even if I was, what kind of customer service is that??  I haven't contacted her supervisor yet, I was going to let it go, but now I'm thinking maybe I should.  It's too late to do anything for me, but maybe it will save some other bride's day.  In the meantime, I'm trying to find places to submit reviews on the venue.
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    Thanks for all of your advice. I am going to write a letter to the owner of my venue tonight. If I get any noteworthy response I'll let you all know.

    I think others who have had complaints about their venue should do the same. Contacting the event coordinator is not going to get you anywhere. That person won't tell their boss they did a poor job. You need to go higher on the food chain to let the boss/owner know what happened.
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    You should all definitely contact your planner's superiors!  I work in the business and nothing will ever happen to those terrible coordinators unless couples speak up about the problems they've had!  Yell


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    The only problem I had with my wedding was the food wasn't what I ordered. I wanted grilled vegies didn't get that and the ice cream bar we ordered sucked even though the sales cordinator said there would be more toppings and such. Also my dj pretty much sucked I didn't spend much time in the room where dancing was but I heard people complain after how bad the music was. I'm glad I didn't tip him. Sheesh.

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    I also didn't like our DJ. The guy we met with couldn't make it to our wedding, so he sent his assistant. He was lame. I heard complaints about him afterwards from guests. He just had no personality and did not get the crowd moving. He also did not play songs that my guests requested.

    We didn't tip him. I didn't complain about him to his face or to the DJ company. I had other things on my mind that were more upsetting.
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    I was part of a wedding company for a bit so please take this as construtive critism vs. snarky.  We have had people that have wanted to see the product on site because they didn't believe what they saw int he office was what they would get.  We didn't have it happen very often but we did have a few clients come to a venue where we were to see the product. 

    For most wedding there is nobody from the reception on site an hour and a half prior to start time.
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    Jennifer, while I do believe that some wedding coordinators aren't onsite 1.5 hours before the wedding, I think my situation was different. Our wedding was at a B&B that boasted about the fact that they do only 1 wedding per day and that they have their own wedding coordinator who handles all of the details.

    I spent the night at the B&B and met with my coordinator the morning of the wedding. He told me had an appt. at 11:30 a.m., which I was fine with because it was well before our wedding and none of the bridal party had arrived. I do have a problem with the guy doing an interview when there is chaos in the lobby due to guests arriving and checking in to their rooms and members of the bridal party not knowing where to go.

    If a venue brags about the special attention they are going to give to you on your wedding day, then they should follow through with it.
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