Military Brides

Marine OCS

Hey Ladies!

I've never posted on this board before, but FI has recently decided to attend OCS for the Marines. We're trying to figure out a good time for the wedding. I'd rather not do it before he leaves for OCS because that would be really soon (October).

Does anyone here know if there is a break between OCS and TBS and, if so, how long this can typically be?

TIA!

Re: Marine OCS

  • edited December 2011

    From what I understand, is that unless they are doing the special summer sessions, they graduate OCS and then start TBS shortly after, with not much time inbetween.  He should talk to his OSO about the schedule and when he'll start TBS. 

    I don't think you'll have much luck inbetween OCS and TBS.  I only say that because I know Marines that finished OCS, had their commissioning ceremony, and started TBS all in about 4-5 days.  I think it all depends on when classes start for TBS.  The OSO will be your best bet on the schedule.

    You may be able to plan a December wedding.  There is usually a break for TBS during the Christmas/New Year Holidays.  

  • kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I am in the application process to become a candidate. My OSO told me to expect a lengthy PTAD, because TBS is backed up because of the rush to join thanks to the economy. However, don't count on that. My advice would be to not plan a wedding for any time until he's done with TBS, or to do it prior to him leaving. I would advise after TBS. He's going to be exhausted every way someone can be exhausted. And waiting gives you a chance to experience some of the life before you get married. 

    However, have him talk to his OSO about the chances of PTAD, but even if the chances are good, don't count on it, and get military clauses in all your contracts.
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  • kneoknightkneoknight member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Any one can delay accepting their commission after ocs this is easier to accomplish before leaving then after.  Do not expect any time during TBS to get married.
  • edited December 2011
    Okay, my BF went through OCS last summer.  He commissioned immediately, but is inactive reserves while he attends law school.  However, his friends who went through OCS are experiencing 8 month back up to start TBS.

    However, I would expect no more than 3 weeks guaranteed after OCS, just to be on the safe side.  He's going to be exhausted and emotionally drained.  There's also a readjustment period since OCS is so far separated from the "real world".  I had to tell my BF that Michael Jackson had died, weeks afterwards.  It's like they're in a time capsule. I wouldn't have wanted to plan a wedding immediately afterwards.

    I also second the idea of waiting until after TBS.  Yes, you can live with him if you're married and technically see him on nights and weekends, but it actually is probably better for him to not be adjusting to newlywed status at that point.  It's going to need all his concentration and energy, and you'll probably end up feeling disappointed with the situation.  Honestly, if you can handle it, get married after TBS.  It's 6 months, use it as an engagement period (because at least you can talk to him - unlike OCS). 

    That said, if it's the only time you have and you really don't want to wait until after TBS, then may I recommend two weeks after he graduates from OCS.  Even if they get delayed a week (unlikely, but possible) then you'll still be okay.  And just to be sure, he can delay his commissioning by a few weeks.
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  • kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I literally cannot imagine delaying something so important to me once I've gone through OCS. I would be pretty frustrated to delay becoming a Marine after the emotional stress of OCS. Please don't do that to him. Or at least talk to him about it, honestly, without putting what you want on the table. He's the one going through OCS, you can get married any time. 
    I hate Dave Ramsey
  • edited December 2011
    You know, you're absolutely right.  I wasn't thinking about what he'd be missing out on, just how to possibly squeeze a wedding into that time frame without risking it.

    I was so proud of him during the OCS graduation, but during commissioning I was crying like a baby!  It was the biggest moment of his life to date, and probably one of the biggest moments in my life, too.  You don't want to miss that or make it any less significant.

    That said, do it just a few weeks after OCS, and get military clauses in all your contracts.

    Not to be the nay-sayer, but approximately 30% of men who start OCS don't finish (either for medical reasons, or they drop out, or they can't cut it physically) so there's a significant risk that he might not make it.  It's entirely possible that he might be injured (at least 4 guys left BF's platoon of 70 due to broken bones or torn ligaments, some really severe).  So there's a lot of factors that even the military clause won't cover - if he has a broken leg just a few weeks before, will he be up for it? My BF got H1N1 and pneumonia, still managed to pull through the program, but he had some serious recovering to do when he got home.  He had sores all over his body, and had lost a lot of weight.   With all that alone, it might be best to have him get through OCS before setting a date.
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  • edited December 2011
    This is great advice. It sounds like our best bet is to just wait until he's done with TBS. The last thing I want is a groom that has too many things going on and gets overwhelmed.
     
    It just feels like we've been engaged FORVER, and my wedding dress just came in so I got really excited to be able to wear it. But a little extra time won't hurt. :)

    Thanks for all the info!
  • kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Good for you, and planning will be a great happy distraction for you while he's gone/involved in other distractions.
    I hate Dave Ramsey
  • edited December 2011
    That's definitely commendable and selfless, and I'm sure he'll appreciate it.  It's the attitude we all try to have as military significant others.

    Seriously, if you need advice or support, I'm going through it all too!  My BF did OCS last summer, and will start TBS in late 2012 after law school.  I can help you through OCS, then you can help me through TBS!

    I'll send you a Private Message with my contact info.  It would help me, too, to have someone to talk to about it all!
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  • kaynix21kaynix21 member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    My husband did the summer six weeks sessions of OCS and did not commission in his second session because he had not graudated college yet. Now he's trying to get his commission and its awful, so DO NOT DELAY IT!

    As far as I know, there is no real break in between. So if you want to get married in basically the next year, maybe do it before OCS. Yes that's a short amount of time, but you will be in limbo otherwise, because you won't know when you can do it.
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