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Wedding Gift

NikkiPSUNikkiPSU member
500 Comments
in New York-New York City
I was talking to my friend this weekend who is an NYC bride and she said she is expecting to receive at least $300 from each couple, now my FI works and goes to school and the evening and I don't work and go to school full time.  We can only afford to give at the most $150, does this make us look cheap? 
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Re: Wedding Gift

  • LaurelPetrielloLaurelPetriello member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    They say you aren't supposed to expect guests to bring gifts at all.

    While I would never dream of going to a wedding empty-handed, I think it's incredibly rude to expect a certain dollar amount from guests. People's situations vary no matter what kind of an economy we're in, and the purpose of a wedding is to celebrate a love and commitment beyween two people, not to get gifts.

    I say do what you can afford, don't make excuses, and don't feel bad about it either. If she invited you to her wedding, that should mean she's honored to have you share in her special day. End of story. Anything else is icing on the cake.
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  • megandjaymegandjay member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011

    That is extremely rude of her to say! What a greedy selfish bride!

    Give what you are able to afford, if she cannot appreciate a gift then she is not a good friend.


    We got gifts ranging from $25 and up. And we sent the same thank you cards and appreciated the $25 gift just as much as the others.

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  • krusso24krusso24 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Sometimes you can combat the awkwardness by buying something that's not on their registry...

    ...I am going to a wedding next week and the items on the registry were EXTREMELY expensive (there wasn't a single thing less than $250!).  Things are a little tight for us right now, so I went for bang for the buck--the highest perceived value I could muster up--and instead went to Tiffany and bought the couple a beautiful wine decanter.  For $90.  Because that's all that we can afford right now.  But because it comes in that big blue box, with the Tiffany cache, it has a more expensive feel.

    It was the best we could come up with, and I think we did pretty well!
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  • stapletondstapletond
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Give what you can afford!  Some people have a "cover your plate" rule for gifts, but NYC weddings are very expensive!  I really think that a thoughtful gift goes a long way too!!  But please give a gift (you'd be surprised how many people DON'T!!!)
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  • lisalou402lisalou402 member
    Tenth Anniversary 100 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    She's probably thinking of the "cover your plate" rule, which while happens mostly in NY, isn't really based on anything.  She was really rude to tell you that, and you should definitely just give what you can.


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