Officiant vs priest or minister

Re: Officiant vs priest or minister

• cebrady89 member

  

  January 2012

  I agree with CMGr. Getting married in the Catholic church is a big deal - don't get married Catholic if you don't plan on living Catholic. 

  
  

  I'm not sure what the guidelines are for being married in a Protestant faith, but if you're not very religious, I don't see the point in having a religious ceremony. 

  
  

  Having a secular officiant is not a problem at all. My cousin was born Catholic, married a Protestant and they had a mostly secular wedding - a Bible verse was read, but so was a secular poem - it wasn't a religious ceremony, but was meaningful for them nonetheless.

  
  

  Hope that helps

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• MairePoppy mod

  

  January 2012 edited January 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_officiant-vs-priest-minister?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:d2efffd5-6870-4b9d-8d73-0d337edda9abPost:21d3b7ca-2bc5-42e1-8b22-4985fd0f8f99">Re: Officiant vs priest or minister</a>:
  [QUOTE]If you ever want to practice your Catholic faith again in your lifetime, then you should be married by a Catholic priest.  Anything else and you will be excommunicated.  This means that you cannot receive the sacrements or participate in the liturgy.  This is not easy to fix, should you change your mind later.  Have you and your FI discussed how you will raise children?  If you plan to raise them in the Catholic faith, then you probably should be married by a priest. If you don't plan to continue as a Catholic, then it really doesn't matter which you choose.  Either a minister or a non-religious officiant can legally marry you.
  Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]
  
  This is not accurate. If you marry outside the Roman Catholic church, you will not be allowed to receive communion. That is because you will not be considered to be in a state of grace because of your marital situation.<strong> You will not be excommunicated. </strong>You will be welcome to attend mass and participate in the liturgy, baptize your children and raise them in the Catholic church. I know this is true because my husband and I were married outside the church and didn't have our marriage convalidated until 10 years later - after 3 children.

                     

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• maccor16 member

  

  January 2012

  Thanks, My FI doesn't like the Catholic religion, so we will not be raising our children that way.  I didn't realize that the catholic chuch excommunicates you. I think that we are either going to have an officant or a minister then.  Thanks for the input!

  

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• Riss91 member

  

  January 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_officiant-vs-priest-minister?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:d2efffd5-6870-4b9d-8d73-0d337edda9abPost:21f6d74b-3540-4337-b045-0c1ca538f918">Re: Officiant vs priest or minister</a>:
  [QUOTE]Thanks, My FI doesn't like the Catholic religion, so we will not be raising our children that way.  I didn't realize that the catholic chuch excommunicates you. I think that we are either going to have an officant or a minister then.  Thanks for the input!
  Posted by maccor16[/QUOTE]
  
  You <u><strong>WILL NOT</strong></u> be excommunicated.  Excommunication is different than simply not being in a state of grace. If you are not in a state of grace, you will no longer be allowed to receive sacraments (such as communion) until the point of which you correct the problem. This can be done through convalidation (a ceremony where the Catholic church recognizes non-Catholic marriages).

  
  

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• Riss91 member

  

  January 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_officiant-vs-priest-minister?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:d2efffd5-6870-4b9d-8d73-0d337edda9abPost:c513d65f-4ca9-4b18-831d-24ac4ab615ec">Re: Officiant vs priest or minister</a>:
  [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Officiant vs priest or minister : I am sorry if I was mistaken, but I looked it up, and excommunication means being barred from the sacrements and litergy.  This is not something that can be fixed in confession. A convalidation is not easy to get, especially if you had the opportunity to be married in the Catholic church and chose otherwise. Apologies if I used the wrong word.
  Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]
  
  It's tricky and I believe the term was used more broadly years ago, so it is easy to equate it to the state of your soul.
  
  It is true that when you are excommunicated you are barred from sacraments AND liturgy. This is not the same as no longer being in a state of grace. When we sin, we are no longer allowed to receive sacraments such as communion, until we confess our sins/correct the behavior. Being married outside of the church is NOT in and of itself a sin, since the Church believes that the ceremony lacked the proper Catholic form. The sin comes in when the couple consumates the marriage and is therefore commiting marital acts without a proper marriage. In other countries, you are required to have a separate civil ceremony before the religious ceremony. In these instances, the couple isn't in a state of sin because they will not consumate the marriage until AFTER the religious cermony. The same would be true here, if the couple didn't consumate the civil marriage. But confession can resolve these sins whereas sins that result in excommuication must be handled by a bishop (in most cases) and are NOT cleared merely through confession. There are some exceptions to the rule.
  
  Excommunication is more severe, and only relates to a few sins. From the Catechism, excommunication is discussed in Paragraph 1463:
  
  "Certain particularly grave sins incur excommunication, the most severe ecclesiastical penalty, which impedes the reception of the sacraments and the exercise of certain ecclesiastical acts, and for which absolution consequently cannot be granted, according to canon law, except by the Pope, the bishop or the place or priests authorized by them. In danger of death any priest, even if deprived of faculties for hearing confession, can absolve from every sin and excommunication."

  
  

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• maccor16 member

  

  January 2012

  Okay thank you, for all the information...My FI and I will have to think about what we decide to do then.  I wasn't aware of most of this information. Thank you all.

  

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