The "Doughmesstic" blogger

AmoroAgain · March 2010

Deleted my comment on her blog. lol!! I told her that her H didn't stop talking to the woman because he wanted to, he stopped because he got caught and he'll do it again. I mean, I said it nicely, but this woman is fully into her "It's the woman's fault" thing and that her H could NEVER have decided to have an affair of his own accord.

banana468 · March 2010

She's still "new" at it.

So it takes two people to make a marriage work but not to have an affair. That must be some "new" math.

AmoroAgain · March 2010

Yeah.... There's a river in Egypt and all that

banana468 · March 2010

And I wrote new in quotes both times. Guess I'm getting old 'n busted.

kd.joseph · March 2010

Well as we discussed yesterday. If she is micro-managing him to do all this stuff, he'll be right back to it as soon as she calms down. It may not even be this women, but she'd be convenient.

I wonder if "they" are going to counseling? She infers that she is.

AmoroAgain · March 2010

Oh, I didn't pick that up at all KD. I just thought it was hilarious she took that down. I assume that's why she's stopped talking to people who told her to leave him. This is a total train wreck in slo mo.

thesuninherhead · March 2010

I read some of that last night- her responding to the cheater's husband about how HIS wife is not being honest, etc etc.

It strikes me as though she's very much in denial, and is doing her best to convince herself that her husband is in the right in the situation. I'm fairly confident there'll be renewed anger soon, as the reality of the betrayal sets in.

I love H, but I don't think I could stay- even if I wanted to- if he did something like this to me. I'd never be able to rationalise away that hurt (and I doubt she will be able to, either- they have a long way to go before things are ok with them, IMO).

Nebb · March 2010

Once she starts neglecting him and her relationship again (which she admitted she did), he will cheat again. Maybe with the same other woman, maybe with another, but he will do it. She sounds kinda off her rocker to me, to be quite honest.

AmoroAgain · March 2010

Nebb, I agree- she's sounding a little cuckoo. But, I don't know if thats right now or always. And, I tend to take her "I neglected him and our marriage" stuff with a grain of salt because she's very much trying to figure out what she did to "cause" this to happen. I'm not sure you can believe her right now about that stuff.

kd.joseph · March 2010

As humiliating as it is to go through, I couldn't imagine blogging about it. And it so easy to blame the other person. Her husband is perfection according to her first post. Yeah right.

Try as you may trust is gone, and he'll get tired of her going through his things, and wanting to know where he is every minute of every day. The first time he's late coming home. House of cards.

Nebb · March 2010

Thats true, were only getting one sided information from someone who is obviously very emotional right now. I just know if my husband did that to me, I would NOT be airing all of the details online, I just wouldnt want strangers knowing the intimate details of my relationship like that.

jasmineh7777 · March 2010

The fact that she is blaming herself really bothers me. Shouldn't her husband be assuring her that this was his fuuck up?

kd.joseph · March 2010

Believe me, it's total humiliation. It was even more embarrassing to find out how many people around you knew.

She's in a stage right now. She'll turn on him soon enough.

AmoroAgain · March 2010

I hope so. It's really pathetic and upsetting right now.

kd.joseph · March 2010

She's lashing out on everyone around her that doesn't agree with her, case in point is her deleting your post.

Maybe,just maybe she'll come to her senses and realize that she's not the real problem here. He needs to be doing everything possible to make it right. Not because she's forcing him, he needs to do this stuff on his own.

Maybe her therapist will help, if she's telling him/her the truth.

kimheartsscott · March 2010

I feel so bad for her, and I have to admit, I cheer her on a bit in my head when she posts angry. I know she just found out and is going through a lot, but I wish it were more obvious that he is going through a lot too. She shouldn't be blaming herself. She even admitted that in one post (lifeboats?) but she still does it. She should not be making excuses for him like she is, though.

pinkpinot · March 2010

I've been reading too and she just found out her husband was cheating 6 days ago. I know if I was in her situation I wouldn't be thinking clearly, how could you? The rush of emotions is too much for me to even think about but as time goes on, she may decide to leave him. I think right now it's probably comforting for her to think that they can get through this but give her some time and maybe that will change or maybe her husband will leave. She literally had the carpet pulled out from under her and on top of it, a little 2 year old to care for. She'll be in denial for awhile but soon, I believe she'll see things for how they are (hopefully).