Wedding Day Assignments

archaegrl · February 2010

So I have been reading alot of places where members of the bridal party have different assignments, tasks, and responsibilities on the BIG DAY. What I was wondering is if there is anyone doing this? AND if so what will you ask your bridal party to do.

AmoroAgain · February 2010

Wedding day assignments-- show up dressed at x time for photos.

That's. It.

trix1223 · February 2010

Here it is:
Assignment #1: Show up clean and sober
Assignment #2: Walk down the aisle
Assignment #3: Stand respectfully during the ceremony
Assignment #4: Smile for the pictures.

That's it. The sum total of "assignments".

psichick · February 2010

your bridal party are your friends, not your servants. treat them as such.

janedoe1113a · February 2010

Don't assign your bridal party jobs.

SarahPLiz · February 2010

Ditto PPs. My BP is to show up on time, clean and sober, and conduct themselves in an appropriate manner. Other than that, they just need to have fun!

archaegrl · February 2010

OK. Good. I am just going to check that off the knot checklist. I think me needing them super early because we are having an 11 am wedding is work enough. THANKS

JMU_Bride09 · February 2010

FI and I are asking his brother and his best man to help us monitor the iPod and serve as announcer, but we know that they are excited about this (FI's brother actually asked us if he could do it) so I don't think it will really be a task or assignment for them. Other than that, we're not asking them to do more than stated in PP.

RogueQueen · February 2010

I am assigning my Man of Honor to be the official fluffer of my dress whenever it is needed ( after i walk down the aisle, some photos, etc) and bustle my dress. I intend to get many photos of all this and somehow use these as revenge for years of pranks he has pulled on me. Revenge is sweet.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · February 2010

The best man might be asked to help distribute tips and final payments (clearly marked in envelopes). Then again, our fathers might do that. Two people will need to sign the marriage license, but we aren't sure who yet.

psichick · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_wedding-day-assignments?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:84d0292d-18ea-4dec-9cc6-48b6ff7c9ba9Post:96fea905-64a5-4837-a9f3-431ae9fb3c30">Re: Wedding Day Assignments</a>:
[QUOTE]I am doing some of those assignments. I'm working on making a detailed schedule for each person, so they'll know where to be, and when to be there. During the reception, I'm having a brunch, and the food will be set up at different food stations. I put down one of the food stations for each bridesmaid to keep an eye on. She doesn't need to stay there the whole time, or serve people (we are having people helping in the kitchen.) I just assigned her to keep an eye that way, and if it starts running low to let the people in the kitchen know real quick. Then after we leave, I have a lot of things divied out to differant people. I'm pretty sure this is socially acceptable, 'cause we had 6 weddings at our church last summer and every time people from the church stayed to help clean-up. I just have certain people assigned to make sure certain things get back to the right places. One girl is checking to make sure the lights are put back in the upstairs closet, one guy is in charge of organizing people with getting tables put back etc... Many hands make light work, and having seen this in action at my church before, I think it will help everything run smoothly and quickly in getting cleaned up. :)
Posted by cwilt[/QUOTE]

are you serious? these people are not your slaves. if you are having servers for the brunch then it's THEIR job to make sure that there's enough food, not your bridal parties. and it's not acceptable to give them "tasks" for clean up after the wedding. that's YOUR job. you can ask if they wouldn't mind helping, but they are in no way obligated to do so. again, these people are not your slaves, they are your friends. you shouldn't be requiring them to do anything other than support you on your wedding day.

duckie1905 · February 2010

cwilt, you need to hire people to do those things. Those jobs are not the responsibility of the WP

cwilt · February 2010

Woah, I did not expect to get flamed for that. I really think you may not understand my church's culture. For one thing, the people at the church would be offended if we didn't let them help, so it is not like the wedding party is doing everything. It will end up being a big group effort (I know, I've helped many times before).
Secondly, it isn't like I am having my wedding party serving the food, or having one person pick up all the lights. I'm just assigning one person to check on each thing, so it doesn't end up all falling on just one person.
My church is really like a family. I have been to many weddings like this before, and the guys and girls at church like to help. Many have already volunteered, and asked about helping with different things like serving, preparing food, cleaning up etc. They honestly are offended if one doesn't let them help.
On top of all this, I do not have the money to hire people to do all of that. We are on a very tight budget (which is why I'm doing so much diy). My dress was only 99 dollars (David's Bridal sale), and I'm planning on using mostly flowers from our own garden. I am trying to get very nice bridal party gifts, but none of the things we are doing in any part of the wedding are super expensive. We are probably spending the most on food.
I understand that you may not have seen this before, but please don't flame me for this. I'm trying my best with what I have.

MyNameIsNot · February 2010

Oh, I assure you, I've seen it before. And I was shocked and appalled then also. So were the people drafted into service. But of course, they told the bride that they didn't mind and were happy to do it, as they didn't want to hurt her feelings. But behind her back, they were saying other things.

Being on a tight budget is no excuse for taking advantage of people.

psichick · February 2010

^^^^ what mynameisnot said.

it doesn't matter what your "church culture" is, people are not your servants. and no one is going to be offended because they can't be your hired help, that's just ridiculous.

[Deleted User] · February 2010

My MOH's job is to walk down the aisle and take pictures with me (and make sure her psycho stalker ex-boyfriend doesn't somehow manage to show up, but that's a different story). Best man's job is to make sure FI is at the alter when I walk down the aisle (not that I'm worried he wont' be).

The only job I gave anyone was my little brother, who is very loud and loves to be the center of attention. he is going to help show people where to go and make the announcements. He wanted to do it, so I told him to go for it.

Your BP isn't there to work for you, they are there to support you.

jules0505 · February 2010

My photographer actually requested that I give a timeline or schedule to each individual in my wedding party. Besides showing up on time and dress, they don't have any other duties.

However, my photographer also suggested that I have "wedding coordinator" on the day of to make sure that things are getting accomplished and running on schedule. This person should be assertive and able to take charge, but should also know a good deal of the family in order to help coordinate pictures. I'm using a good friend of mine for this role. I've assigned small jobs to other extended family and my coordinator will be responsible for making sure those things get accomplished.

All in all, no one outside of my wedding party will have a big list of to-dos but only one or two things that will make them feel like they are helping! It's going to be an easy, stress free day for everyone!

adam'sbride · February 2010

My wedding party will be signing the registry, holding onto the rings, showing up, smiling, and my MOH will be giving a speech. Plain and simple. As the other ladies said. Your bridal party is there to celebrate with you and support you on your big day, not be your slave.

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