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How pissed should I be?

ElasticCassidyElasticCassidy
10 Comments
in Wedding Woes
I ordered a dress on eBay, no big deal, it's gorgeous, a great deal... but it's corseted and was supposed to come with a panel to slide in behind the corseting to hide your skin. 

I messaged the seller to say it didn't send (even though he expressly advertisted it on the listing) and I just have this awful feeling that he doesn't have it... how mad should I be if he writes back and doesn't have it? 

The corseting comes down past my butt, so the dress is unwearable without it, and yes, I can have one made, but I didn't intend to buy and unwearable dress, I paid for a complete wearable gown. 

What do you ladies think?
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Re: How pissed should I be?

  • Butter CookieButter Cookie member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    When is your wedding? How worth it is it to be angry about this? If he can send another will you accept it with no further issue or will you still be angry? What is the square root of 12?
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  • Paulo's Menina BelaPaulo's Menina Bela member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Stop working yourself up. Wait until you get your answer from the seller. Just becuase it didn't arrive with the dress doesn't mean the guy doesn't have it. If it's just a separate panel, assuming your dress might need minor alterations, a seamstress could easily make one for you.
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  • hmonkeyhmonkey member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    how mad should you be?  who cares?  the only thing that matters is what you are going to do about it.

    if this ebay dress is blue, i will laugh at you, and so will all your guests.  ALL OF THEM.
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  • ElasticCassidyElasticCassidy
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Oh, if he has it and sends it along, we're cool. I just have a nagging suspicion that there's no back panel. It's a pre-owned dress so I understand that some of the beadwork is loose and things like that, but if the panel is lost I want to know how angry I should be that I paid for something complete and now have to pay more.

    It probably isn't that worth it to be angry, it's just the first day I've had my dress and I would like to call everyone I know to come over and watch me walk around in it and I don't want to be doing that with bright red undies peaking out. Once again, I can forgive the delay in the bridal fashion show if the seller sends along the panel no problem. 

    I'm probably making a bigger deal than it actually is... 
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  • DG1DG1 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011

    Don't be mad about it.  Just deal with it.  Ask him to send one. If he doesn't have it, let him know he needs to make one and send it to you by X date (early enough for you to still have one made if he doesn't come through).  If he doesn't, then take it up with ebay and/or paypal and/or your credit card company. 

    But don't waste too much energy actually stressing or being upset about a problem that is so easily solved.

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  • NOLABridesmaidNOLABridesmaid member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited December 2011
    Lord, please let me never get one of these calls, 

    it's just the first day I've had my dress and I would like to call everyone I know to come over and watch me walk around in it
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  • ElasticCassidyElasticCassidy
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    The dress IS not blue... MAN, would I be pissed about that. 

    The thing is I don't know what I would do if the panel is lost, other than have one made - which is a bitch since it DOESN'T need alterations, but I mean as far as the seller goes. I don't know the protocol. Do I leave bad feedback or demand a partial refund... or just ship it back and order something new?


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  • ElasticCassidyElasticCassidy
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thanks DG1, that makes a lot of sense. 

    @NOLA, haha I just have a lot of sisters and family that is chomping at the bit to see the dress. I didn't let anyone go shopping with me so it's sort of this big mystery to everyone involved in my wedding. 
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  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_pissed-should?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:5d816714-ae9a-4896-af0e-635e5da97e20Post:da5ac47c-17db-4f7f-aff2-bf59b0aeb2a6">Re: How pissed should I be?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Lord, please let me never get one of these calls,  it's just the first day I've had my dress and I would like to call everyone I know to come over and watch me walk around in it
    Posted by NOLABridesmaid[/QUOTE]

    No isht NOLA.

    Who besides ElastyCassie here makes those kinds of phone calls? 

    Anyone? Anyone???

    Bueller?
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  • ElasticCassidyElasticCassidy
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Wow I didn't know other brides were such bitches. 
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  • LnR70707LnR70707 member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_pissed-should?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:5d816714-ae9a-4896-af0e-635e5da97e20Post:06dc165a-66db-4b93-a8fa-2d329f30c6fd">Re: How pissed should I be?</a>:
    [QUOTE]The dress IS not blue... MAN, would I be pissed about that.  The thing is I don't know what I would do if the panel is lost, other than have one made - which is a bitch since it DOESN'T need alterations, but I mean as far as the seller goes. I don't know the protocol. Do I leave bad feedback or demand a partial refund... or just ship it back and order something new?
    Posted by ElasticCassidy[/QUOTE]

    As far as ebay goes you have a few options if the description specifically said the panel was included.  The first step (aside from inquiring if the seller just forgot it) is obviously to come to some agreement with the seller.  I'd personally ask for a partial refund.   It is bad ebay etiquette (and gets you nowhere) to leave bad feedback without any attempt to resolve the problem first.  Your other option is to return it and request full refund.  If the seller refuses to work with you at all you can open a dispute with ebay and put a hold on the paypal payment until the issue is resolved.
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  • ElasticCassidyElasticCassidy
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thanks, L&R, this is the only thing I've EVER bought from eBay. I sent a message last night asking if he had it and just forgot, I haven't left feedback yet... I just wondered what I should do if he doesn't have it. I didn't order from somebody who has a lot of dresses and would just have a spare - it's the only dress he had/has. 

    I just didn't want to find out he didn't have and write back and demand part of my money back if that wasn't the right thing to do. 

    I love your signature. 
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  • allisonkbyeallisonkbye member
    100 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    if they dont have it you can leave negative feedback and get your money back with ebay/paypal buyer protection and in the event you file a case and the seller doesn't respond you might even get your money back and get to keep the dress. 
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  • ElasticCassidyElasticCassidy
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    It's been 24 hours since I messaged the seller. How long is appropriate to wait? I was going to give him until Monday. 
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  • NuttyAlmondNuttyAlmond member
    Third Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_pissed-should?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:5d816714-ae9a-4896-af0e-635e5da97e20Post:80870034-0ca1-43b6-a7b5-a625375229f0">Re: How pissed should I be?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wow I didn't know other brides were such bitches. 
    Posted by ElasticCassidy[/QUOTE]

    HAHAHAHAHA I love this
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  • ElasticCassidyElasticCassidy
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    :D

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