Older bride with dad walking down the isle

spiritedcharm · April 2011

I'm in my 40s and getting married for the third time. My fiance has never been married and wanted a "real" wedding, so we are having a fairly traditional wedding for him.

My dad didn't walk me down the isle for either of my previous weddings for various reasons, but this time, I'm thinking I would like that. Does it seem silly for a 40 something bride to be escorted by her dad? I know it's "my wedding, my decision", but I wonder what your opinions are of this.

vannymuse · April 2011

I don't think it's silly at all. If it would mean a lot to you and your dad, then you should go ahead and do it.

impslave · April 2011

I was 42 when I got married and had my grandfather walk with me. My dad passed away when I was a baby, so my granddad was the logical one for me.

If this is what you want, I'm sure your dad will be pleased to walk with you.

GL!

foreverurz23 · April 2011

Your always going to be Daddy's little girl...I think Its an awsome idea

Calypso1977 · April 2011

i do, but that's nothing to do with your age or the number of marriages under your belt. i just personally HATE teh symbolism of being "given away". women are not property, and this dates back to when the father literally gave his daughter away in exchange for a dowry.

midgetthemighty · April 2011

If that's what you want, then do it! I don't think it matters at all how old you are in this situation.

On a side note, it's aisle, and I feel like I see this error on at least one board every day. Not trying to be a jerk, just trying to help.

ootmother2 · April 2011

It's not silly to me at all.

I think your dad would be thrilled if you honored him that way!

Lisa50 · April 2011

If that's what floats your boat, go for it. I am marrying for the second time and will walk up the aisle with my fiance.

I think I'm missing something though ... how does having an escort make the wedding more "real" than if you were to take the walk alone? Am I mis-reading?

McKenna2012 · April 2011

I'll be almost 40 when my dad walks me down the aisle. I don't think I could ever be too old for that!

needle&thread · April 2011

My step-dad is giving me away 'again' (he said he wasn't keeping me...LOL).

I'm in my mid-forties...and I still pout and get my way...always daddie's girl.

S and CJ

memSomerville · April 2011

I'm so surprised there isn't an "older brides" board here. I thought I was the only one for a while, until I found the folks in Second Marriages. Even though it's my first, my life is much more like theirs than it is like a lot of college students....But it seems there are more of us than I realized.

I know there are plenty of commonalities among brides in general--but I think there are specific issues that are different for us than for youngstahs.

Or have I just missed that board somewhere?

needle&thread · April 2011

@memsomerville

No...you are so right...there is no older brides board that I know of; second marriages board is the best bet.

Now, as far as weddings go--you're a youngun! Embrace it...you don't have the previous marriage drama. Fresh new marriage...ahhh...the sweet aroma!!! No stench of craziness...

But you gotta admit, these younguns are cute though...

S and CJ

Calypso1977 · April 2011

well, "older" is all a mindset. i was 31, nearly 32 when i married, and i considered myself older, since most gals i know are married in their mid-20's and seem to focus more on the pretty princess day than the marriage. i felt my planning was completely different from that of my friends weddings, who married years before me (and some of which are on their seconds already, which were done very differently than their firsts).

memSomerville · April 2011

Oh, @needle&thread, they are cute. And so eager. And sometimes they make me laugh a lot...

But still--in Attire there was just another question from an "older bride". Now, I know some of us want the same styles the younger ones do--but honestly, my "vintage" body really does require something else, and I also would have liked a place to discuss that with more seasoned women.

My career trajectory is different. Parent and sibling relationships are very different. My home-owning status is different. My...er...birth control needs are different. I could list 10 things that are different off the top of my head, and also not necessarily second wedding issues, but certainly there's overlap.

I'm just suprised it doesn't exist.

Kimberly0402 · April 2011

My mom is getting married 2 1/2 months after me and my brother is walking her down the aisle. I will be the matron of honor (which sounds weird, but true b/c I'll be married by then). Her fiance has never been married, but they've been together for 10 years. There is nothign wrong with your father giving you away or your child or brother ect. Do what you want.

impslave · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_older-bride-dad-walking-down-isle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:e140580f-81b7-41c5-a7ce-b0d7f94c2725Post:4090a58e-c33b-4d11-9605-2fa5f319f8cb">Re: Older bride with dad walking down the isle</a>:
[QUOTE]I suggested to Knot Annie a while back that she start an Older Brides board because Second and Older are not the same thing. I'm a first time bride and in my 40s. Much of what I find on the boards just isn't relevant to me, so I have to sift through it to find bits and pieces that I can use.
Posted by LucyHC[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Agreed!

</div>

memSomerville · April 2011

@LucyHC agreed +1!

Thanks, I figured it had come up before--but had no idea how one went about agitating for that.

jenjenaz · April 2011

i'll be older AND a second time bride when we get married. it felt weird having my dad 'give me away' for the 2nd time, so my fiance and i are going to walk ourselves up that aisle....symbolizing coming to our new life together....

diehld · April 2011

I think it would be great for your dad to walk you down the aisle... he's never done it before so why not try something new...

jleahd33 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_older-bride-dad-walking-down-isle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:e140580f-81b7-41c5-a7ce-b0d7f94c2725Post:19b8f601-13e3-49a4-9817-2550303992e2">Re: Older bride with dad walking down the isle</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Your always going to be Daddy's little girl...I think Its an awsome idea
</strong>Posted by foreverurz23[/QUOTE]

I agree with this!

Giaspo · April 2011

I'm getting married for the first time at 41. My dad passed away because of 9/11 and I would give anything to have him here to walk me down the aisle. I'm going down the aisle alone in his memory as no one can replace him. If you want your dad to walk you down the aisle, go for it!

Giaspo · April 2011

Oh and I'd love an older brides' board! Recently my local board did a roll call of everyone's age and I was mortified! There are unique issues when you are older. I hope it happens! Great idea!

memSomerville · April 2011

I wanted to come back and post that we do now have the 40+ brides board, in case anyone is checking in on this thread:

http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_40-plus-brides

Thanks to all those who made noise about it!

Older bride with dad walking down the isle

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