My thoughts used to be consumed by my wedding, but now all I think about is my little peanut. I never imagined becoming pregnant before I was married, but I'm very happy. I know God doesn't make mistakes, and I know that my baby is truly a blessing. I'm so overjoyed by this entire experience although it just started.
As you all know, I was laid off from my job in January. I haven't found a job yet, and I refuse to stop looking. Since I've been unemployed, I've been uninsured too. So yesterday, I went to the department of social services. And I didn't know what to expect or how to feel. I never imagined having to sign up for government assistance in order to take care of myself or my child, but until FI and I are married, I'm unable to get health coverage from his job. Honestly, applying for medicaid wasn't a bad experience. My caseworker was funny and nice and we talked about me graduating from a local university a couple years ago and going to grad school. She actually looked kind of confused about me not being able to find a job.
I was so scared that without having private insurance I would be stuck going to the health department for prenatal care. I have nothing against most health departments; hell I actually preferred going to my health department back home instead of going to a regular OBGYN. The health dept. where I currently live, however, does not seem like the safest place in the world. And I wasn't open to having my baby in the Duke healthcare system. Yeah, Duke is top-ranked and known throughout the world, but I've known people who have had their babies at Duke and the care rubbed me the wrong way. I interned at Duke University the summer before my senior year in college and it was the worst experience in my life. My wonderful caseworker recommended a family practice at the University of NC @ Chapel Hill and I was thrilled! My sis is a UNC alum, FI and I are the biggest Tarheel fans, and I was actually accepted to UNC for undergrad (but I went for the full scholarship at an HBCU instead). I never knew prenatal care would excite me so much! lol
Anywho, yesterday I think the baby taught me to suck up my pride. My peanut has changed my life so much. A week ago I was terrified to find out I was pregnant, and today I can't wait to go through all of the pregnancy milestones. God is so good!!!!
