My sister is 17 years older than I am, but we were superclose when I was growing up. After she left her husband (after five kids), she made choices I didn't agree with and we've grown apart. She's had two more kids with her new boyfriend, and we've kind of rebuilt our relationship - although we're nowhere near where we used to be. I want her two young daughters in my wedding - I have 10 nieces and nephews and by the time I get married all except for those two will be over 10 and I can't justify a million bridesmaids. Long story short, she asked me the other day if she was going to be in my wedding. I don't want to hurt her, but I know she 1. can't afford it and 2. I don't really want her in the wedding party. How do I let her down gently? She works at a hotel and caters weddings a lot and is really into weddings; would it be a good choice to ask her to help me plan the wedding?