This is not your birthday party. UGH!

Lrini1 · October 2012

I was able to hang out with some of my girlfriends last weekend and got on the subject of the wedding. They're all invited. Our wedding is the day before one girl's birthday. She informed me that she's so excited to have free drinks to countdown to her birthday (AKA my wedding, where I'm paying per consumption). Her plan is to get as drunk as possible and countdown to being 25, then have everyone leave to go to a hotel that she's booked to party.
I'm taken back because this is my wedding and she's supposed to be my friend. I feel like she's taking this event and turning it into a $15K birthday party for herself. Then to say that our mutual friends should all leave the reception and go party in a hotel? Really? I'm hurt, and annoyed by this but maybe I shouldn't be. I guess the other girls just silently staring at her when she told them to book their rooms because she wasn't going to split with anyone was sort of reassuring. I hope that means that everyone will stay a good while at the reception and dance, have a few drinks (without getting sloppy) eat yummy food and cake, make s'mores and celebrate with us.
I've put so much time and effort into this one day- our wedding day, not her birthday. I want the full day to enjoy it. Not worrying about her getting trashed in front of my Southern Baptist family then leaving with my friends in tow because my wedding wasn't centered around her birthday (which is the following day). Maybe I should put some candles in our cake and ask that everyone sing Happy Birthday to her? Does she think she gets a whole weekend?

achiduck · October 2012

Ugh.. some people are just so selfish. Maybe she's jealous of all the attention you're getting due to the wedding and is trying to take some of it for herself?

LDubHawksFan · October 2012

That is annoying, but try not to let it get to you. I personally wouldn't leave a wedding early to go back to a hotel for a "birthday" party. How late is your wedding going? Ours ends at 10:30, so if I were in that position, I could see the mutual friends all leaving at the end and continuing the party. Unless your wedding goes until after midnight, I don't get where she would even think that this rolls into her birthday! It seems like your other friends don't seem that amused and hopefully they won't follow suit.

EADenver · October 2012

That's very rude (no doubt about it) but don't let it get to you. You shouldn't worry about her lack of class.

Good point made above about what time the wedding ends. If it ends early, then it is less of a problem (ie- people won't be leaving your wedding) and it will impact your reception less.

I was once at a wedding where people kept toasting people besides the bride and groom (ie- a birthday, a couple who got engaged that month, a recently married couple, an anniversary) and it was really weird. If you have a day-of coordinator, have her regulate the toasts pretty carefully so nothing like that starts happening!

But otherwise, enjoy your beautiful, special, wonderful day. :-)

NRod70 · October 2012

Wow. That is just rude and I would be angry as well. I'm guessing the stares from the other friends were in response to how ridiculous she sounded.

I wouldn't worry about her trying to get other guests to leave early for her party...most people have more common sense than she does, not to mention manners. If there heading over there at the end of the reception, then that's a different story.

Don't put too much thought in to her selfish statements and cause yourself stress. You'll have a beautiful day and a wonderful time celebrating with friends!

Lrini1 · October 2012

Thanks all. It's just super frustrating. Last call is at 11. She was really upset that I wasn't going to extend it so she could ring in midnight (like it was frickin' NYE or something). I'll just focus on the good, but I just sat there speechless for a minute when she asked if I'd be coming by the hotel after the wedding. Ummm... no I'll be sort of busy seeing as it's my wedding night. FI and I are spending our first night in our new home, assuming it's ready. Thanks though.

therabbitsmith · October 2012

Wow, thats kinda rude. I would be frustrated too. Just stay focused on the good and ignore anything she says about her birthday.

achiduck · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_this-is-not-your-birthday-party-ugh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:4768164a-e363-41ad-a1a4-80330d7a6b67Post:1531e05f-0832-4b1c-86d2-2c52cf130af9">Re: This is not your birthday party. UGH!</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks all. It's just super frustrating. Last call is at 11. She was really upset that I wasn't going to extend it so she could ring in midnight (like it was frickin' NYE or something). I'll just focus on the good, but<strong> I just sat there speechless for a minute when she asked if I'd be coming by the hotel after the wedding.</strong> Ummm... no I'll be sort of busy seeing as it's my wedding night. FI and I are spending our first night in our new home, assuming it's ready. Thanks though.
Posted by Lrini1[/QUOTE]
This girl has balls... big hairy brass balls.

nitecheese · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_this-is-not-your-birthday-party-ugh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:4768164a-e363-41ad-a1a4-80330d7a6b67Post:9f99251e-d0e2-45df-9ce2-a6ffc66ebf07">Re: This is not your birthday party. UGH!</a>:
[QUOTE]: This girl has balls... big hairy brass balls.
Posted by achiduck[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Heeee! This completely made my afternoon. *snark*

</div>

This is not your birthday party. UGH!

Re: This is not your birthday party. UGH!

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