Pre-wedding Parties

Mom's at the bachelorette party???

So I was not planning on inviting my mom or fh's mom to the bachelorette party, but today I was told that fmil will be "heart broken" if she is not invited. I thought that it was more of a night out with friends. Where as the bridal shower was the place for mom's, grandma's and aunts. I don't know how to let fmil know that she is not invited. Am I being a bridezilla? Should I just have the mom's there? I would love any opinions!
TTC since April 2012
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BFP #2 1/18/13 EDD 9/29/13
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Re: Mom's at the bachelorette party???

  • Simply FatedSimply Fated member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    Does she not know what a bachlorette party can sometimes entail? Maybe she is picturing manicures and spa day?

    I'd invite her, to keep the peace, and when the night starts and she is unhappy, she can leave. Or maybe she'll drink you and your friends under the table. Jus sayin. :)
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_moms-bachelorette-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:27a5dc69-b300-412d-94d0-c0187451e9cdPost:33a5da1f-fa53-4783-b305-cb8d3fffed7a">Re: Mom's at the bachelorette party???</a>:
    [QUOTE]Does she not know what a bachlorette party can sometimes entail? Maybe she is picturing manicures and spa day? I'd invite her, to keep the peace, and when the night starts and she is unhappy, she can leave. Or maybe she'll drink you and your friends under the table. Jus sayin. :)
    Posted by Simply Fated[/QUOTE]
    Baaahhhaaa...My future MIL can surely drink me under the table!!! That made me laugh too hard!
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  • jeanna85jeanna85 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I would tell her what the plans are and see if she still wants to go. In my fiance's family, bachelor parties include all of the men in the family (uncles, father, cousins) as well as friends and they usually just go to a sports game or something. The women in his family for bachelorettes do spa days or nice dinners so moms are invited. However, in my family its getting drunk and crazy in Atlantic City type things and the parents don't go. See what she's expecting.
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    As a MOB, my concept of a bp is the same as your's, a night out for my daughter and her friends. I do not expect to be invited.
    It's tough to be put on the spot, like that, but you should just be honest and direct (as she is). Tell her neither mom will be invited to the bp. To sooth her broken heart, you could invite her and your mom, if she's interested,  out to lunch or a spa date.
                       
  • nbcarlsonnbcarlson member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    Haha that would be funny if she drank me under the table, I know my mom could! But fmil doesn't drink...which makes me even more uncomfortable ha. But I like the idea of taking her and my mom out to a spa day that would be good!

    TTC since April 2012
    BFP #1 9/26/12 EDD 6/7/13 MC at 5w2d on 10/6/12
    BFP #2 1/18/13 EDD 9/29/13
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic imageImage and video hosting by TinyPic

    My Blog
  • tracyt14tracyt14 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Yeah-- my mom was at my bachelorette party and she was great!  I guess it depends on the relationship you have with your mom and whether your mom is going to be your "mom" that night of be "one of the girls"-- if she can seperate the two and understand that this is your fun night out-- then I say go for it!  But if she is going to disapprove of whatever goes on and make you feel bad then I would just explain to both moms that the night out will be "X-rated" and they would probably prefer to pass. 
  • m1schlueterm1schlueter member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I've been to several bachelorette parties where we start off with dinner and all the moms come. After dinner the bride and friends go off with her friends for the rowdy part of the evening. The moms all knew beforehand how the night was planned and all agreed they didn't need to see the after dinner activities.
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