October 2012 Weddings

There's One in EVERY Family - UGH!

I'll try to condence this as much as possible.  When my FI and I started planning, we knew we wanted an adults only wedding. We love kids, but SO MANY of our friends have little ones that our guest list would have swelled by at least 50. For the most part, everyone has been great and been super excited for the wedding.

Then, there's my "cousin".  He's my step-father's nephew, and I've only met him a handful of times, but my mom insisted that we invite him.  He and his wife are coming from New Hampshire to Ohio for the wedding. I think this is lovely and I'm quite touched. However, they wrote in the 5 year old daughter on the invitation.  She will be the only child at the reception other than my niece and nephew who are my FG and RB.  I feel weird about this, especially because she could have been left in the care of her grandparents or her aunt in NH. 

Now, "cousin"'s wife is making demands about the menu. She needs a kid's meal. she needs everything to be gluten free and wants a dessert option.  I understand food allergies, but really?  I'm sorry thgat my cake isn't gluten free. 

I know I'm probably stressing for no reason, but the more I think about it, the more annoyed I get.  What should I tell her about the dessert?  I have the final meeting with my caterer tomorrow.
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Re: There's One in EVERY Family - UGH!

  • That was incredibly rude of them to assume that their daughter was invited.  Call her up and say "sorry, the invitation was only for you and Bob.  We can't accommodate little Susie.  We hope you can still make it."  

    As far as demanding the dessert option, I would just buy some candy (maybe something in similar flavors to the cake) and say, I'm sorry the cake isn't gluten free - here's a dessert.  From what I've heard, gluten free cookies/cakes taste like sand and have that consistency too.  You should try to make sure her meal is gluten free; your caterer should be able to help with that.  People that have a gluten intolerance usually end up spending the entire night in the bathroom with digestive issues after ingesting gluten.
  • 1. on the kid front, yes, call them and say "We're sorry for the confusion, but children are not invited to the wedding.  We hope you'll still be able to attend."

    2. Gluten allergies are nothing to mess with.  I have to limit what I eat with gluten in or like PP said, I'm in the restroom for hours.  That being said, I would see what you can do for her meal as far as removing gluten.

    3.  A dessert option, REALLY?  Does she think this is some kind of a fancy dinner where there will be options?  Weddings= Wedding cake.  No one remembers the actual meal, it's all about the cake.  If she has a gluten allergy, she should be used to passing on cake and other desserts anyway!

    Good luck!!!

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  • My SIL and one of the GMs GFs are gluten free b/c they have celiacs disease. My venue is providing a fruit cup or plain ice cream for them. I would talk to your venue about doing that. My cake is certainly not gluten free and they both understand that they won't be able to eat it.

    I think people wil understand the daughter since they travelled.

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  • As a bride who has Celiac Disease and needs to be gluten free, I really think it's important that you honor the gluten free request for the meal.  I actually am having a non-gluten free cake, but my caterer is offering 4 gluten free dessert choices.  It's surprising how many things actually are gluten-free and most caterers should be able to accomodate this request.  They are very "in the know" on food allergies and really should be able to do something.  Also, lots of bakeries sell gluten free cupcakes.  Even fruit is a fine option!  Lots of times I go to weddings and have to pass on dessert, and although I understand, I often feel left out and bombarded with questions with why I can't eat it.  I didn't want that for my GF guests and my caterer is incredible about accomodating them! 

    As far as kids when they weren't invited... I won't get started!
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  • Eeep!  To clarify - I have no problem making sure that her meal is gluten free. That is reasonable. Demanding a dessert and notifying me of the dietary restrictions a week before the wedding seems a bit...rude.  I don't want her to feel ill, or cause her any problems, I just would have liked to have known this in advance.

    Thanks for all the advice, ladies!  :)
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  • yellow1988yellow1988 member
    First Comment
    edited October 2012
    A week before the wedding is very rude!!! Call and tell them it is an adult only wedding, and you wished they had notified you sooner about their allergies. But due to time you unfortunately cannot honor that request. ( I Am having a cake with a nut extract and to be on the safe side we are putting up a cute little sign and letting people know that the grooms cake is but free, if you do t have food allergies you really don't think of them. The only reason I thought about the peanuts (nut extracts) is that I work in child care and it is a common allergy and I want to take no chances)
  • yellow1988yellow1988 member
    First Comment
    edited October 2012
    *nut free, lol. Not but
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